Where did the flirting go?

[mrcool48047]

I’ve recently reconnected with a crush I went out with a couple of times about 9yrs ago and we have been texting a lot since last week. I messaged her on FB Sun after she posted a pic from vaca and said she looked great and it started from there. I asked her if she was single these days and if I could see her to which she promptly replied yes so we quickly planned a date for this week. The texting continued for almost 3 full days straight with lots of witty banter, joking, flirting, talking about sexual preferences and she even sent some unsolicited selfies (face and x rated). we had plans for a date on Fri but by Wed, she was ready to meet and asked me to come see her after she got off work, to which I did. We spent a few hours together talking, and I eventually drove her home and we kissed briefly before she went in for the night. However the next day things shifted. She still sent me a message in the morning like she had done the days previous however she told me she was going to be quiet for the day because she was tired and wanted to sleep. She was sweet and did call me babe though. I told her I appreciated her letting me know and to get rest and we could talk later. As the week has gone on she has cont to initiate contact with me and held conversations but her flirting has nearly stopped even with me attempting to interject humor and some of the joking and teasing that we laughed about before. She also canceled the date on Friday because she ended up having to work all weekend (which is true) and has mentioned multiple times that she is tired and exhausted. She did agree to reschedule, but no firm commitment and she told me I would need to be patient with her because her plate is full. However, she has kept in touch and continues to initiate and hold text conv when she can. So what’s going on and how do I handle this? I really like her and happy to be patient but things are feeling flat. Do I ask her about it? How do I reengage her? Withdraw my attention?

[Oliverlogan263]

Whoa bro, that is a trip. Sounds like this girl has some mixed feelings or something going on under the surface. A few thoughts:

- Things got super intimate real fast between you guys so maybe she got spooked once it became "real" and not just texts.

- Her work being crazy could be legit, but her energy dropping off so sudden is suspect. Like she's cooling things off.

- Don't mean to pry, but any chance she's already got a guy she's not fully over or something? Might explain the hot/cold.

- For now I'd back off the texts a bit and let her chase you instead of blowing her phone up. Play it cool like you've got options.

- When she reaches out, keep it light and fun. No need to address things getting serious or ask where her heads at. Might push her away.

- Suggest doing something low-key next time like coffee after work if she's down. See how she acts in person.

- If the lukewarm thing continues much longer, you may just have to confront her or let it fizzle out, bro. Your call if you can handle the confusion.

Hope it works out man. Stay positive - at least she's still making an effort for now!

[strateguy632]

she seems too busy for a relationship.

find someone who can put a limit on career time.