What’s wrong with some western men no longer dating western women?

Question

I was on a date with this English man, who is cute and all. We talked about our dating histories and he told me he only dated women from his country when he was a teen and after that he has dated Asians or Asian Americans. I am not Asian.

He said the reason he doesn’t date the women from his country is that they have become very masculine and they are also quite big for his taste. I don’t think so, I have seen lots of very pretty British women.
He’s very fit himself.

He thinks I look like I could be French, so not sure how I fit in his fondness of liking Asians lol.

I don’t mind that. I think he obviously likes me so far.

What I wonder is , why do western men no longer date western women?

I myself am from The Eastern Europe. So I kind of am in the middle I think, in Asia, they consider me western, in the west, they consider me more exotic, as Eastern. So, I am a winner in both, cause I am exotic in both hehe

DishLady · Accepted Answer

First of all, the root of the phenomenon is that western men are way more complicated than they seem... They tend to stay buttoned up about a lot of things, leaving a lot more guesswork for a girl... They may tell you they want some word/behavior/thing (A), not (B)... but they really want both. On top of it, today's western man often just seems to expect the right girl to fall into his lap rather than to be a gentleman and make an effort with the right lady.

Next, in general it's important to pay attention to a guys words, hints and actions in order to understand his actual values and intentions. All three have to line up. There are the direct things they say, then things they hint at (either verbally or with gestures) but don't outright tell you (so they can wiggle out of your interpretation as needed) and finally there are their direct actions. When all three don't line up it causes a ton of tension and confusion in a relationship.

Next, western WOMEN want to do the same thing -- playing this stupid game -- and dating thus becomes a recipe for disaster.

One solution -- for those who aren't ready to throw in the towel on dating -- is for folks from western communities to start looking at folks from eastern communities. Folks from several mediterranean, eastern european, Asian regions tend not to subscribe to the puritanical bs that's so popular in America, for example... They regard all the uptight rules, hesitation and double-talk as being complete and utter nonsense (and rightfully so). They tend to value a more "safe space" philosophy (in which both the guy and gal share openly and honestly, which leads to fewer obstacles in the relationship overall). It's not a perfect theory, but in general, there's a more linear mode of thought among eastern communities compared to folks in western communities, which makes the opposing culture more appealing, particularly to a guy/girl who has had their fill of frustration from their local dating pool.

When folks from Eastern communities live in places like North America and try to start up relationships there are some hilarious conceptual blooper reels to cross... Some leading to a wonderful and lasting relationship, some leading to a breakup and a few important life lessons.

The important thing is not to date the opposing culture simply for the novelty of doing so. Learn about the culture and see if those values are something you as an individual are 100% capable of embracing.

Nothing is perfect, each of us just has to pick what works best for themselves.

Rei13 · Accepted Answer

Honestly doesn’t matter to me if a western man does or doesn’t date western women. I do find the reasoning funny/hypocritical towards the men that specifically only date foreign women sometimes and a lot of the men that are passport bros can’t attract women in their everyday life.

MasseurDeMojo · Accepted Answer

It is not all western women; it is a good number who give the rest a bad name. I love all women, I try to find beauty in all. In the last 10 to 15 years, attitudes have changed, and the women have become such that they demand the man do what ever they say without question. They have in essence taken the leadership role from the men, and after about a year or so leave the man they are with for a new man.

There are a few women who have come to the realization that being in charge is not good. So, now they are looking for leadership from a man. The men have gotten tired of being treated as non-leaders, and have started looking elsewhere to women who still believe in supporting the man so he can be successful in the leadership role. If you do a study about the title "husband," you will find that the husband being the protector is given that title because he is the first to die in protecting the family. Most assailants would rather go against the husband than the mother. If the husband is not there and the mother has to fight, she will fight to the death to protect her children. If you manage to overcome the mother, and the husband finds her lifeless; there is no place you can hide, he will find you, and make you pay with your life.

Western men want women who are willing to submit to them 100 percent, as they submit to their wives 100 percent; but lead the family and fight to make sure the family has what it needs. A woman who supports her husband is not a slave, she is his equal in all things!!! Every decision he makes for the family has been made with consideration to her inputs!!! You have two equals, but only one can lead!! By allowing the man to lead, you give yourself as a woman more freedom to do other things that will compliment his leadership; making you both working together stronger!!!

OlderAndWiser · Accepted Answer

I am a Caucasian American and most of the women I dated over my lifetime were Caucasian Americans. The relationships I had were mainly with Caucasian Americans, though two of my partners were from Colombia and Germany. I was open to dating women from different cultures but I rarely met them, as my hometown does not have a big international community.

When I started using online dating in 2007, it opened up many more possibilities for me. I didn't particularly seek foreign women but I read their profiles and messaged the ones who sounded like a reasonable match for me. I dated women from Ukraine, Poland, Ireland, Brazil, Philippines, India, and China.

Dating foreign-born women initially had some novelty to it but that difference didn't make or break the relationship. Ultimately, we discovered we were compatible and developed feelings for each other, or we didn't.

In April, I married my Chinese (now American citizen) girlfriend. The differences between American and the Chinese culture (of 1960's through the 1990's, when she came to the US) are huge and some of those differences make our relationship more challenging.

If she was not in my life and I was using online dating again, I would be open to dating American women and foreign-born women. Perhaps the phenomenon you have noted is a generational thing but I don't think American women are ruined.

AviatorTom · Answer

Nothing against England, but I agree with him. I've been to England many times, lived there for a shirt time, several years ago. Most English women are not what most would call "pretty".

Skinhead-1979 · Answer

The only example I can use is my dad

My dad couldn't handle my mother, she was too confronting towards him about all his flaws and he can't deal with that. He completely ignored her and blocked her out (which led to her emotionally and to some extend physically abusing me).

So he went looking for an Eastern European Woman. They are more family orientated and will stick with their families/ husbands no matter how difficult things get.

My dad is an insensitive, lazy, selfish prick (He does display Narcissistic Traits)... I feel sorry for my 'step-mother'; he is also the reason why she doesn't have any contact with her son; the prick has lost contact with 3 of his 4 sons, me included.

I also ended up with a 'foreign' woman. I have never been lucky when it came down to love in my native country (which is the Netherlands by the way); online, in computer games, I met women from other European countries. I have been close to a woman from Finland, Iceland and eventually I moved to the UK to move in with an English woman. Big mistake, I should have gone to Italy which was my initial intention (I had been offered a place to stay and employment by a couple from Milan; they were also looking forward to couple me with an Italian woman).

If I could go back in time, I would look for a woman even further away... a non-European woman. I am massively interested in Black History, Culture and Music. I would love to live in an African country or Jamaica, and build up a life and family there... but alas, I am stuck in the UK now because I have son with that 'Black Widow' and I have also raised her daughter as my own. I have no contact with both kids, it's too dangerous for me... but I do want to stay near them in case they ever come looking for me.

A friend of mine from Indonesia also tries to persuade me to come to Sulawesi and he will help me find a woman. Yes, I do feel drawn to Asian women too... but I think I will pass on this.

RyanR03 · Answer

Honestly a lot of the Younger ones are so indoctrinated via an inflated sense of self and importance on social media that it has created a collective entitled personality that is a complete turnoff. It’s a saturation of nauseating feminist ego that is not remotely appealing to men. Men aren’t terribly complex. They are simply more GENETICALLY drawn to a woman that behaves like a woman should and not one that this dogmatic brainwashing femi-Nazi doctrine has created. It’s simply not appealing to me at all. I don’t care what they look like on exterior.

my lady is first generation Hispanic and she is by no means a waif. But she is not prancing around trying to be “fierce” and competing. Women competing against a man for “who is the most dominant ego” is simply against nature. And a random woman doesn’t owe a male a single thing. But if you just want to know why a lot of men no longer even bother.. it’s because this emergent power dynamic between women and men does not foster a relationship. And it is simply not in a man’s nature to desire. At all.

RebelinSteel · Answer

Well he was talking bollox, yes western guys date western girls. Who else are they supposed to date when the actual demographic for non western is so low. I would likely need to travel 40 miles to be in an area with none western girls, these would be predominantly Pakistani but not many other types other than a much higher level of western girls.
To date a non western girl you need to try among a very small number of girls, for example if in a pub, cafe etc, if they were 100 girls, about 4 would be non western. Places like London will be higher but who is going to spend £200 on train costs and then a couple hundred on hotel costs on the off chance of meeting a single non western girl.
if you are from Eastern Europe, you are European to anyone from Europe.

HighValue · Answer

Many western women are terrible partners. They have a promiscuous past, greedy, unfair to men, expect MUCH more from the man than they have to offer themselves, are hypocritical, dishonest, lazy, quite overweight, and put in very little effort to make their partner happy, but expect him to do a lot for her.

Good quality men have options and don't need to put up with the very low quality of the majority of western women. There is a whole world of options to choose form for good quality men. Especially tall strong White men with a good face have many options throughout the world.

DJB72 · Answer

It's not about you being exotic. It's about western women being toxic in their attitude.

No guy wants to have a real relationship with a woman who refers to her dating history as a "body count". Honestly, if they've racked up that many sexual partners by 25 that the term seems appropriate then zero decent guys will want to be the last on the list.

The attitude is what passes for "feminism" these days - which is actually misandry. The whole "I don't need a man" attitude in the West - especially America and the UK - is pretty much the biggest turnoff in history, bluntly it reduces men to little more than a dildo on legs. And Real Men don't want that.

I'm not saying that a wife has to stay at home or earn less than the husband or anything like that, I'm just saying a Real Man wants to be the provider for his family.

TDDMS · Answer

I believe I was about 21 years old when I stopped dating American women and began dating east Asian women (eg. sophisticated Asian). The issue with so many American women is every time I ask a woman out, I feel like I should have two lawyers on hand, an arsenal of video cameras, a forensic scientist, and 5 witnesses. With east Asian women, interacting with them just feels natural. When I tell Asian women that I want to date them, to do them, or relate to them, I don't need an entire staff of lawyers and forensic staff supporting me and be on the ready in a second's notice.

Also, honor is a big part of their culture. I've never been falsely accused by one Asian woman. With American women, I know more men who've had to deal with that nonsense than women who have been Real Raped (TM).

Unit1 · Answer

"western women" Cut this bullshit out. On average  it is perceived from us, that women are hateful towards us in one region and the opposite of that in another. Why would men date women, that treat them with hostility? If there are any, that's beyond me. When women make us feel loved like they do in places like in Thailand or Philippines (at least from what I see being posted, that isn't produced for the purpose of gaining mass views like those gold digger prank videos) and not give us any hostile treatments, is that really a surprised pikachu face moment, that passport bro's exist or fucking what?

KostasKouvalis · Answer

Those videos sum it up perfectly. Also, enough of this already. You're not from Eastern Europe, you're from WEST Asia. Your genetic origins come from West Asia. Most people wouldn't consider you guys White.

hahahmm · Answer

He wasn't saying they were masculine for their looks but rather for their behavior. Although there are also women who look masculine too. Normal men don't want masculine acting women in a serious relationship... even if he thinks she looks visually attractive.

Feminism is all about making women more masculine (when it benefits her) and making men more feminine (when it benefits her).

LazerBean · Answer

Males like that are pretty rare. But conservative women are hard to find and have very high standards. So when a man wants a conservative wife but does not meet those standards (typically because they have already been ruined by liberal values) , they have to look to countries that are more culturally conservative and have lower standards.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

54% of the population is overweight or obese. About 30% (or higher) of the population has a shite attitude. It's not so much that we won't, I have three dates this week, it's that many just aren't worth any effort. We'll see how these three turn out.

Lionman95 · Answer

It´s a trend online I don´t think it´s happening that much in real life. Though the issue is that some Western guys have a hard time finding a woman that´s interested in them as they may lack social skills, they don´t make less or the amount of the average woman or they are have conservative values. So some of them go to Eastern Europe or to Asia to find a partner there.

BonzoInBitburg · Answer

After I dated an Asian woman I never dated someone born in my country again. It has nothing to do with looks, they seem to understand men better and know what men want. Most of the women I dated were very hard working, even if they didn't make much, they appreciated what they had. I've never been nagged by my Asian wife and she makes our house peaceful. She changed for the better after we got married.

RavVid · Answer

Basically women aren't offering much. Women like high value men. Men like high quality women. We just don't see much quality anymore.

Anonymous · Answer

It's because looking white is no longer considered "on vogue". Nowadays mixed race women, or ethnically ambiguous or women of color are considered more attractive due to shifting beauty standards and social media. Being a person of color or dating one is just perceived as cooler by a lot of people, both personality-wise and lookswise 🤷

osmanthus · Answer

Patriarchal thinking. Western women refusing to be domestic slaves and pushovers who make less money and live their lives apart from making men the center of their universe.

Nikki1989 · Answer

Western men mostly date western women. Those saying otherwise probably never leave their basements.

Anonymous · Answer

Why should western men waste time on women who dont want to be wives and mothers, and treat marriage like something you wipe your ass with and flush down the toilet. Traditional men are not into the average typical modern worthless piece of shit feminist woman. And small town conservative girls are getting harder and harder to find.

Anonymous · Answer

Western women for the most part lack moral values, almost always single mothers, Wasteful and No respect for themselves.

After my last 2 experience being lead on for 3 years when I was 22-28 and a year when I was 30. Not interested in American women.

ChinaGrove · Answer

Thai women don't weaponize sex. That's a phenomena of the West. Western men tolerate it and Asian men do not.

NathanDavis · Answer

I will definitely won't be traveling to the East back and forth just to date... that's crazy, lol

Twalli · Answer

My girlfriend is pretty western, born and raised in the US, white, not a first generation American.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

He just told you what's wrong. Lol, it's a problem with the culture. A lot of Western women are simply aggressive and abrasive people.

Amur8711 · Answer

Western women especially left leaning women have become extremely feminist and everything a guy does that may be considered traditional treatment of a woman gets labeled toxic masculinity and patriarchy.

HusamRocks · Answer

Because they're boring, typical and easy to get and COLD - no offense - and men love to pursue women

Grond21 · Answer

Because feminism has been highly destructive to women in the West

PeterLegg91 · Answer

It's cos we live in a world where we have to like agree and accept people from other countries, and part of that is people think its the right thing to do :( they'd be called racist so people go along with the narrative

MK1997 · Answer

Why does your profile says Solomon islands? And because western women are much different to Eastern Europen women. In their values, thinking and looks.

OhLongJohnsoning · Answer

Why does it HAVE to be western and western, or eastern and eastern. Why can't it be a western person with a eastern person?

Phoenix98 · Answer

Why waste your time on something not worth your time?

Anonymous · Answer

There's still plenty of great western women but western women as a whole have been gradually moving away from femininity and it's simply not appealing to a lot of guys.

msc545 · Answer

Thanks to feminism, Western women have become almost unbearable to most men.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

They are dating them when I go outside my house.  It's just internet propaganda BS that men aren't.

KrakenAttackin · Answer

Because modern western women are insufferable.

genericname85 · Answer

western women. that's what's wrong.

Anonymous · Answer

MeToo statutes and firing squads

What’s wrong with some western men no longer dating western women?

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