If a person is with another person it's because they want to be it's that simple
If there's manipulation or taken advantage of each other you have to be able to read right through it the moment that it happens I mean nowadays in these times people are not stupid
There's a lot of younger women that like older guys because they take care of them
There's a lot of older guys who like younger women because they make them feel young again and they like to be active
There are younger girls that like to be with older guys because older guys know how to treat girls..
But for whatever reason that two people are together it's only their business if they love each other that is awesome if they want to use each other that is awesome but it's only their business it doesn't matter what we think
. I see if they're happy allow them to live life to experience to explore and be happy until they're not anymore or until they. They get married split up have children go on vacation but whatever they want to do it's none of our business really
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Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
As a woman engaged to a guy 14 years younger (and impregnated by him with twins) I've got to say that I really don't like the assumptions that relationships with major age gaps are automatically harmful. I'm sure that there are cases where the older partner is just taking advantage of the younger for their looks/naivety while the younger partner is just a gold digger. However, there are a lot of very healthy major age gap relationships that aren't that way at all. Mine is one of them.
Even though the gender ages are reversed in my case, I actually have gotten a lot of people assume the same things about our relationship. There are a lot of people who have said that I'm just going through some midlife crisis, I'm just dating him because he's young and hot, I'm taking advantage of him, etc. A lot of people have said that he's just dating me because he's trying to take advantage of the money I make. A lot of people say a relationship between us will never work out. After I got pregnant a lot of people actually got upset and told us we were being dumb and irresponsible (even though we'd been dating for over a year and were already engaged/living together).
The thing is that none of those things are true, and if they took the time to not just assume negative things about our relationship (rooted in negative, often untrue, stereotypes about major age gap relationships) they'd soon figure that out.
It gets to the point where it can be hurtful and problematic. People really need to stop assuming that just because a couple has a major age gap that there's got to be some huge problem with them/the relationship.
Both are wrong but maybe a bit more wrong to take advantage of a younger woman that doesn't have a developed enough brain to make good decisions yet. It's like telling a kid to get in the van for some candy. Obviously some kids are just too dumb to know better but we should never blame the kid in that scenario
If a woman being young means she her brain isn't developed enough to make good decisions, then they shouldn't be voting or have any management jobs either.
@HighValue most young people aren't voting anyways 😂 and jobs are a bit different than a relationship. Most of us can quit are jobs without our bosses abusing us for leaving but it's a bit different in a relationship where there is no safety and much higher emotions involved
What? You think a 40 year old man that possibly had his attention caught by an attractive young lady is going to treat her in a bad way. At the same time, the benefits of the military make up for dying at the ripe old age of 18. And you're telling me I'm irresponsible and me brain be underdeveloped? Well thanks, we see where men rate in your view.
@Dongie there are 0 reasons why a 40 year old man should be talking to a girl under 25 unless it's his daughter. Military members that young have higher ups babysitting them on the daily. They ain't out there being responsible on their own
Ok. You want my opinion? Reasons to date a girl under 25 if you are 40. Whew, to recapture some youth, to have pleasure with a young pretty girl as it does wonders for the soul. To experience the generation after you. To not be alone. To look like you have got it going on to the rest of the men around you. To let other women see you with a young beautiful girl. To have fun while you're still young enough to do so. To possibly find love and marriage. And I don't recall it saying the man pursued the woman. Didn't it just ask is either one wrong. I said it's equal. And in the Marines, Army the guys hit the front lines. They don't give them a few years so they die at 20. Which isn't much different. It's difficult to imagine being put out there to get killed when women are not put out there to get killed.
@Dongie if a 40 year old wanted those things then he should have dated a 25 year old and under when he was 25 and under. Not when he's hitting middle age and needs a caretaker. And wtf women also go to war so that has nothing to do with gender. The benefits outweigh the risks for being in the military
A caretaker. How old are you? Tom Brady played pro football till age 45. I am beginning to think you are just pulling my leg. Do you understand that term?
Women go to the military, too. You should look up the death statistics for women who died in battle over the past 80 years or even 30 years. Then take a peek at the men who died so you can sit way up there and tell a 40 year old man that he had his time and can't date any of your fellow females in you generation because it's your call.
You are one stubborn, WRONG little girl. Yeah maybe that 40 year old better fuckin run before letting a 25 year old sink her hooks into him. I told you not to do this. And if you block me. I already can't turn a damn page without seeing 3 or 4 messages that this person blocked me. Haha... shit.
So your saying the girl can't be wrong for using for money but the guy should what, be executed for wanting some pussy? Ot what? That's what it sounds like. Everything is hypothetical. Why do you date when asked out? Money?
How about this. You silly young girls want to be lifted up in your hypotheticals. And you place the man in a situation where he is a sleepy SOB and therefore the girl is sweetened sugar and spice and we guys are shit and snails and all that shot. What does the fucking question say? Does it specify this or that? I'm tired of this question. You are not putting anything valid because you are tampering with the original question. You have to ease it this way so that they are both wrong, BUT HIM A BIT MORE. ARE YOUR LITTLE EGOS SO FRAGILE THAT YOU HAVE TO PUT IT ALL ON THE GUY. WHEN I WAS 20 I HAD ENOUGH SENSE TO SURVIVE. HELL I've BEEN USED FOR MONEY AND GOT NOTHING IN RETURN. GIRLS AT 15, 20, 25, 50 ATE NOT ANYMORE INNOCENT BY NATURE THAN THE GUY. O K
I can see how that is possible. But that isn’t always the truth. When I dated a girl who was younger it wasn’t cause I tried to take advantage of her or something like that. I dated her cause she was nice, always smiling, friendly, didn’t have a lot of emotional damage, wasn’t bitter toward men. She appreciated things. A lot of experiences I was able to give her as far as traveling, new restaurants, etc. She appreciated it. She wasn’t argumentative. I get that no relationship is ever going to to go w out ever having an argument, but there’s just some women who are argumentative about a lot of things. Bitter about a lot of things in their life. I did t take advantage of her inexperience or whatever you wish to call it. I actually instill a lot of wisdom in her, how to navigate through life better. Things that I would consider helpful. In my younger years I could have never done a lot of those things for her. Financially most men don’t make good money till maybe their 30s, maybe even 40s. The wisdom, knowledge that I’ve gained is far superior than what it was when I was in my 20s. Men want to be a girl’s first for a lot of things, it just sex.
Anyone that takes advantage of anyone is wrong , So just because of an age gap that doesn’t mean they are taking advantage of each other , they are just attracted to each other
Younger women are wanted for looks, sure, but moreso for less emotional baggage, less promiscuous past, not having kids from past relationships, and more younger generations of women are more fair to men in a relationship and are more likely to have interests in common.
Older men do have more wisdom than when they were younger, more life experiences to make better decisions in a relationship, are often more honest about what they want in a relationship because they aren't desperate and willing to say anything just to get sex, they have a more masculine looking face, and the women will know what they are getting long term. For example, if a woman goes with a man in his early 20s that is in shape, he may become lazy and get in very bad shape in a few years like many high school and college athletes do, but if he is in his mid 30s pr older and is still in good shape, that is because it is a lifestyle habit he has developed that is unlikely to ever change. Also, if they are older and never used drugs or heavily drank alcohol, they are very unlikely to suddenly start.
It isn't all about just money and looks. There are many reasons why good quality older men and good quality younger women are a good match for long term relationships.
My friends feel it's their appointed duty They keep tryin' to tell me all you want to do is use me Ah-huh, but my answer Yeah to all that use me stuff
Yes, I wanna spread the news That if it feels this good gettin' used Oh, you just keep on usin' me Until you use me up
My brother sit me right down and he talked to me He told me that I ought not to let you just walk on me And I'm sure he meant well Yeah, but when our talk was through I said brother if you only knew You'd wish that you were in my shoes You just keep on usin' me Until you use me up
Talkin' 'bout you usin' people It all depends on what you do It ain't too bad the way you're usin' me 'Cause I sure am usin' you to do the things that you do Ah-huh, to do the things that you do
When you take advantage of someone you treat them poorly in order to get something good from them. An older guy doesn't need to treat a younger woman bad just because she isn't as old as him. That's completely illogical. Most young women are also not beautiful. They are average, nothing special, ho hum... Most guys aren't dating younger women because they have a lack of knowledge. They are dating them because they are single and on the market. As women get older, their odds of getting married increases. When they are younger, they are more interested in dating. You also can't be too wise if you're being hustled for your money by some young women with a "lack of knowledge" as you put it... If you're spoiling a young women with money and material possessions, you're just hiring a prostitute and are afraid to call it what it is.
@yahyahyah Yes most young women are average. They are nothing special. It's weird that I have to repeat myself... That's the general principle of a normal distribution.
Also the lack of baggage. There's generally no kid or kids to deal with. Not only is she younger and prettier but she has more time for you and is able to concentrate on you.
Like a younger woman isn't going to tell you no to sex because she's tired or has to get up for work tomorrow or just isn't feeling it. No the younger woman will have sex if she's not feeling it, in postions an older woman won't. If she on her period a younger woman will give you a blowjob.
Then there's the issue of kids. The older she gets the less kids shd can have and less likely she can have kids, if she has kids already you mat not want anymore and may expect you to contribute financially to the care of her kids
It is bullshit. Maybe in some cases this is true, but some older and younger people get together for the same reason that people the same age get together. They form a genuine connection.
that's a misconception. I dated a 19yo when I was 29. ngl she was extremely obsessed with me. I was super flattered and gave her a chance. I did not for once think about taking advantage of her or brainwashing her or anything like that. I saw her as a young adult. however, I did break it off as she seemed immature. that was just one of the reasons
I for one am 30 and could easily date women aged 18-24 or even 18-29 lol - I would date them mainly because they're still spritely than me, I'd prefer aged 24-25 or even 20 to 24.
So are we going to make assumptions on which one is getting their innocence stolen?
My cousin had her first kid at 14. By the time she graduated high school she was pregnant with her second. A year later she was dating a 45 year old who never dated in his life. So which one stole who’s innocence?
It really depends on the couple and their personalities, sometimes it works out and sometimes it’s a disaster and ends quickly, just depends on honesty
Usually true, and they're both at fault, greater culpability depending the each person's ability to deceive the other.
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Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
Not everybody takes advantage of others, I haven't.
But to answer your question it's wrong for anybody to take advantage of anybody, for any reason.
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
I think anyone who is being honest and capable of setting aside their bias for their own gender would say it's equal. Neither one is a good thing, but a lot of both sexes do as you described.
I changed my answer. Maybe his wife was a school teacher and ran off with a 13 year old. So he's strolling down the sidewalk, feeling lonely and betrayed. And this young 19 year old is window shopping. Fresh out of high school. She sees this attractive 45 year old man and thinks, "Umm, he looks lonely. Think I'll chat him up. She does so, and next thing you know, they are on their honeymoon to Venice. For a month. Because he happens to be a geologist and is very rich. But she didn't find this out until he presented her with the prenuptial after he asked for her hand in matrimony. And they love happily ever after. He making it to 125 years old. She makes it to 102.
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