Does this mean he will cheat?

[Anonymous]

So whenever i ask my husband if he is cheating, he says " with this big belly, u think girls are dying for me?" Or " when? I'm always at work "

I find this weird to say, as if he is telling Me if he was fit, he would cheat.

I caught him years ago, flirting with girls online. He says he stopped and I don't wanna check his phone.

[kmg9150]

I still can't understand how dudes thinks a guys physical appearance all of a sudden makes him so much more likely to get women. These boys still think that women feel attraction as they do, physical, outer characteristics…. Yes Mr Oracle this ones for you…. With all your statistical claims, I would have assume you would read something about the female psyche. You think its the money, cars, status, looks that women sought out these men for. Errr wrong. Its the confidence they have. Most men lack confidence because they lack these things in their life. So they walk around feeling sorry for themselves and cower when around women they feel are out of their league. I feel this is you…. The other thing is, men default when conversing with women as if they are talking to a dude…. Stop thinking women behave like dudes… Quit thinking that “If this was me, then ……. So she would also ……”. No………. Females, can I get some input…..





As for the flirty husband…. If all he was doing was flirting, maybe he wanted to better his social skills. After all honey, if you were out and about at a party, do you want to see your man engaging with people making them laugh and feel good or be literal with all his interactions lacking a feel vibe? I flirt with everyone, one of my favorite things to do is at Walmart when dudes are stalking the shelves I randomly go, hey, that doesn't belong there. Then bullshit a bit.. I do same kind of things with females. Do you want ever dude you interact with to behave as a monotone “Can I take your order, for here or to go, that will be 24.35. Number 5, NEXT!” I doubt it…. If you caught him dancing with some girl somewhere in “secret” what would you think, what would you say, would you think he was plowing it?


Now, what if this great man actually had been taking dancing lessons and was out in front of real people for the first time doing so to shake off any anxiety…. Because he wanted to surprise you….. Unless you caught him with his D in another V, you shouldn't behave as such..


It should be trust until you find out otherwise… If he was cheating I feel you would know it. All your basing this off is a couple lines of banter…….. I mean what would you say if the roles were reversed?

[Asker]

He actually really shy and so bad with social interaction, growing up, he didn't get much attention from women, I could tell.
He started losing confidence when he started putting on weight..

I'm probably over thinking. I'm actually kinda surprised with the comments i got here, I was hoping to find some reassurance. I have no evidence that he is cheating on me. He is with the family when he is not at work. And he enjoying spending time hanging with Me and the kids. Uts just his reply to ny question that made me a but suspicious

[Asker]

True, all of that.

I would probably say, I'm with the kids 24/7, how am I gonna cheat? Or I would say that he knows I don't do this kind of stuff!

[MrOracle]

What your husband is trying to get you to understand is that whether or not someone cheats has quite a bit to do with how much opportunity they have to cheat. This is exactly why top 5% guys - the guys that nearly all women find attractive - don't even pretend to be faithful.

Take Tiger Woods, for example. 20 years ago, he was married to a Swedish model, but he was young, wealthy, famous, and reasonably good looking, and he literally has BUSLOADS of women following him around, paying off hotel staff to get into his room, etc. For Tiger, opportunity to cheat was literally everywhere, and it's a 1-on-a-million man who could resist that level of temptation.

Most average men get a handful of opportunities to cheat in an entire lifetime, unless they are putting in real time and work to find girls to cheat with. It's not that difficult to be faithful with such little temptation, and so most men don't cheat.

The reason most women think that most men cheat is because most women exclusively chase only the top 10% men - men who can easily cheat. And, yes, most of them cheat, because it's so easy for them to do.

Your husband isn't in that top tier of men, and he knows it. No one is chasing him, and he doesn't have the time and energy to actively try to find someone to cheat with, plus he's not trying to cheat. So the chance of him cheating is close to zero.

Yes, if he woke up tomorrow looking like Brad Pitt at 25, then it would be a very different situation, but that not going to happen, so you shouldn't worry about it.

[DishLady]

🙄 He’s actively trying to open your eyes and tell you in a sarcastic “guy speak” way that the only gal who will have him is you. Why are you being so antsy?

[Nikki1989]

He already has some excuses lined up. Yes, he could cheat.

[Finchie40]

So your husband pretty much already cheated on you , since you found him flirting with other girls’ online , so why are you still with him? His belly has nothing to do with his intentions , there are a lot of girls’ that like chubby teddy bear looking guys’ so his intentions is to physically cheat on you, since he already emotionally cheated on you. Kick him to the curb girl , you are setting yourself up for disaster

[Asker]

How would I know if his intentions is physically cheat on me? I had to stay because we have small kids. He treats me well, he is very thoughtful and kind. And yes years ago I found him talking to some girls online. I forgave him but when I heard his reply last time, I started to have doubts. I'm not physically attracted to him anymore. So intimacy is kinda dead.

[kmg9150]

Flirting is a natural part of human interaction. Your confusing flirting with seduction. You know when you give other guys sh it thats a form of flirting. Its not that serious.

[Finchie40]

Well if the intimacy and affection is kind of dead in your marriage and you aren’t really attracted to him anymore , that could be his reason that he is flirting with other girls’ , he probably feels you don’t want to be close to him anymore , so he is open to other girls’ cuz he is looking for acceptance and the feeling of being wanted. , he probably craves your intimacy and affection , but you are pushing him away. So instead of pointing fingers at him, point fingers at yourself first and ask yourself why all of a sudden aren’t
You attracted to him anymore? and want to be close to him anymore? What changed to make you not attracted to him anymore? Most men will cheat or leave a girl if she doesn’t make him feel valued and wanted anymore , especially if intimacy and affection wasn’t an issue before, in the beginning of your relationship with him , so if it’s an issue now ? He more than likely with be open to finding it elsewhere. Me personally will not stay in a relationship with a girl that all of a sudden stops wanting to be intimate and affectionate with me anymore , that makes excuses not to be in my arms , , I will show her the door and tell her good luck to you , because there are plenty of other girls’ that want to make me feel wanted and valued and appreciated. But I would talk to my partner first and express my feelings of concern to her before making that decision. But if nothing changes after I talked to her? , then I am done with her and will move on. It’s not about who is right or wrong , it’s about compromising with each other , if you love your husband and you want your marriage to last you have to swallow your selfishness and focus on your marriage , make him feel valued and wanted and appreciated , if not? You are best to file for divorce and go your separate ways , and let him find someone that wants to be in his arms. Lack of intimacy and affection in most relationships will kill a relationship mark my words. Understand you married to

[Finchie40]

Not be single anymore , your single days are over the second you said I do , your vows were to love and care for each other no matter what , for sickness and in health til death do us part , if you can’t follow those vows that you more than likely made a promise to God , you are best to file for divorce and let him go.

[OhLongJohnsoning]

I think that he's saying he got lucky with you. id take it as a compliment, however, on the other hand, it could mean that he's settling with who ever took him.

You're basically just saying "you're not shallow"

[TommyMountainFigure]

It COULD mean that, or it could also mean he has no intention of losing weight!

[Abbycado]

Your guys have a solid marriage there, don’t ya? He’d cheat if he wasn’t a fatty? Awesome.

[Asker]

So you mean he would cheat if he wasn't a fatty 🤔 ? we have a good marriage, he is good to me. I asked him if he is cheating because of a show we were watching together on Netflix which was about infidelity and his answer chocked me.

[Abbycado]

Is it good though? He flirted with girls online babe. That’s not good.

I get he doesn’t do it now or at least that is what you think. There is a lot of mistrust from what I can tell.

[Asker]

True. I know what you mean.

[DrPepper12]

No. he's trying to placate your insecurities with humor. I've done that too.

[RavVid]

How often do you ask if he is cheating. I think he just wants you to be realistic.

[Asker]

I think I asked few times lately. Just because of this stupid show on Netflix. And then also because we have not been intimate lately

[RavVid]

He is not responsible for netflix characters. We can get pissed off and not feel like it consequently. Try being nice, loving and respectful.

[Iron_Man]

If you’re insecure, have one of your friends follow him around for a while to verify everything

[Asker]

I wouldn't do go this far. I don't even want to go through his phone.

[Iron_Man]

Ok….

[Anonymous]

If he is not a true man of God, then he is more likely to cheat.

[noohair]

Flirting is not cheating in a man’s view. You might think differently.

[scott04sa22]

Everybody cheats

[Asker]

I never did.

[scott04sa22]

That's what they all say, and they still cheat on people, no matter what