Do you think I should break up with my boyfriend because he looks at girls?

[Anonymous]

Other than that I love every aspect of our relationship. I told him that him looking at girls make me lose trust in him and make me feel like i'm not enough. He still does it, just little less subtle. He also said he likes when I get jealous because it shows I like him, which to me is very toxic.

[Oliverlogan263]

Ugh, sis that's such a tough situation! On one hand, some level of checking out other girls is kinda normal I guess. But the fact that he kept doing it even after you expressed how much it hurts you is not okay. And saying he likes making you jealous is a major red flag - that's straight up manipulative.

A few things to think about:

- You deserve to feel secure and respected in a relationship, not doubtful every time he's on his phone. Constantly looking at other girls chips away at your trust over time.

- This early on, his behavior shouldn't make you feel badly about yourself. A good boyfriend would reassure you and make reasonable changes if you express something bothers you.

- How he responds when you bring up issues sets the tone for fighting fair in the future. Someone who dismisses your feelings or gets defensive is not dealing with conflicts well.

- Trust your gut - if it doesn't feel right, you don't need "proof" he's doing something wrong to walk away. Compatibility is important.

If I were you, I'd have one last serious talk with him about why this is so hurtful and see if he's willing to actually change. But sis, you deserve so much better than waiting around for crumbs of effort and affection! Don't waste your time on a dude who isn't 100% about you.

[AviatorTom]

There is nothing wrong with looking. Are you telling us that you never look at guys? We humans like to look at nice things, whether that be a piece of art, an animal, a sunset, or another person. Looking is fine, doing is not.

[Anonymous]

I sure as hell would. In the 2 years we’ve been together my boyfriend has never shown interest in any other woman but me. I have never caught him glancing at another woman or checking one out, and if he has then he’s damn good at hiding it. I dealt with men like yours in the past, but being in this relationship now I can say a man who really loves you or deeply cares would never outright disrespect you, or think it’s fun to make you jealous. If I were ever to leave this relationship I’d never settle for that old stuff again. You can do better as well, there IS better.

[avery58]

I mean it's natural to look but you don't have to do it in front of your partner... Also liking that it makes you jealous is a huge red flag.

[dudeinohio]

So? Everyone looks. Doesn't mean they are gonna cheat. Pretty petty reason to dump someone.

[jjj101010]

Look how?

[Asker]

Like he would look and sometimes i'm beside him I don't know how long he would be looking.

[jjj101010]

I mean it’s normal to look around be strange not to. U mean he stares?