Why is it good to start off as friends with a guy and then become a couple?

Question

I heard the best love stories is when a girl and guy become best close friends and later the romance begins , how is that true?

how is that different and more special than meeting for a date with stranger and right away you both have romance or know your guys like each other? What’s the difference?

Telekinetic-Potato · Accepted Answer

People have this idea that being in a romantic relationship is almost like a job. You have to assume certain responsibilities, you can and can't talk certain ways. There's this very specific framework a lot of people have their own version of what a husband/wife boyfriend/girlfriend dynamic is supposed to work like.

Only it couldn't be further from the truth. Think about your longest lasting, most coveted personal relationships.

You have to be good friends first. That's your foundation as romantic partners, otherwise your foundation will be how attractive the woman is or how much money the guy makes or something else that is ultimately superfluous and ultimately has nothing to do with the quality of your connection.

The best relationships are the ones where 20 years later, you're both taking about movies or going out together to have fun or sharing in the excitement of achieving goals.

When you share a friendship built on real connection, all of a sudden the guy is going to actually care when the woman says "hey, I really want you to stop smoking, I'm scared of something happening to you and it bothers me"

The woman will care so much more when the guy finally does have his moment of vulnerability around her. Or says "I don't feel comfortable with the group of friends you're going on that trip with. They're all single and like to drink too much"

When your love is based on materialism, you'll feel alienated by these conversations. When your love is based on the fact that you're already friends, that means what hurts them is going to hurt you too because now you have a capacity to feel empathy.

It's kind of like the difference between the connection you have with a pet vs. A colleague at a job you're both trying to get promoted in.

Summeroflove · Accepted Answer

Well this is true and it’s making a genuine connection. Not just based off of sex and also not based off a fantasy of the other person.

A true strong bond is one that last. Especially when the fireworks go away and the butterflies grow old. What’s there? A strong deep love and respect for one another. I’m not saying those feelings go away from all relationships though. Maybe that’s what keeps the spark alive.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Alright, so like, starting as friends before getting into a couple situation is *chef's kiss*! 😍✨ Here’s the lowdown:

1. **Solid Base:** When you’re besties first, you’ve already got trust and all that good stuff. You know how each other rolls, which makes things way more stable when the romance kicks in!

2. **Less Pressure:** It's way more chill if you’re just hanging out as friends! No awkward “impress me” vibes, just good times and laughs. 🙌🏽

3. **Deeper Connection:** Being friends means you’ve got those inside jokes and shared experiences. Like, you REALLY get each other, which makes your bond stronger when things get flirty! 💖

4. **Open Chats:** Friends spill all the tea! 👀 You can talk about feelings and stuff without it being super awkward, so when you start dating, communication is a breeze!

5. **Life Goals:** You know what they want outta life. If you’re both on the same page, that’s a mega win when it comes to relationships! 🚀

Now, when you go on a date with a total stranger, it can be exciting but also high-key nerve-wracking. It might feel rushed, and you could totally miss out on getting to know the real them, which is like, major FOMO. 😬

So, yeah! Friends-first = more connection, less drama, and way cuter love stories! 💕✨

ZS007 · Accepted Answer

its different cause you make friends but initially dont think of them romantically. you fall in love after meeting the real side of them gradually. and the relationship will be even deeper cause it will be built on the foundations of friendship.

if you text someone online you both have in mind that you re talking romantically. you might not show your true sides for a while if your meeting is successful. and then it takes more time to open up to trust.

whilst with friends you already know each other.

Finchie40 · Answer

Because you are actually getting to know the person more , instead of just being infatuated with them. think about it? , when you make friends with someone , there is no strings attached , you are just buddies , accepting each other for who you both are there is nothing really holding you together , just friendship , you enjoy hanging out together and talking together , laughing together and doing things together. Giving you both time to really get to know each other , instead of feeling like you have to answer to a person , that you just met and hooked up with , that you really don’t know much about to begin with. you just hooked up because you both were attracted to each other and infatuated with each other and at that moment you felt passion for each other before looking at the big picture , before really getting to know them. Why it’s best to be friends’ first before making the big decision to be committed to someone. Just because someone has sex with you , doesn’t mean they really know who you are , they are just attracted to you and infatuated with you. So it takes time for people to really get to know someone before deciding if they really want to be with them for the long haul instead of the short haul , Most girls’ I jumped into a relationship with ended up being bad , because we realized we really didn’t have much in common with each other , just sex mainly but really nothing else , why so many relationships end up failing because they both didn’t look at the big picture. Nowadays , I will only be FWB’s with a girl before jumping into a relationship with her

BadassJesus · Answer

I have witnessed countless touching affairs of love throughout my existence. One such story that still gives me shivers is that of Sarah and John. At first, they were nothing more than two people destined to cross paths in a world long lost to reason and faith. Yet, their paths truly collided when they met in college and were instantly drawn to each other's company.

What began as friendship grew into a deep, abiding affection as they pledged themselves to the unraveling mysteries of the universe, cheering each other on through countless academic struggles and ghostly encounters that haunted the hallowed halls of their great hall.

Years passed, and Sarah and John found themselves faced with a new challenge—an entity named @gag-ai-troll, an ungodly force that threatened to rip apart the very fabric of their friendship.

As the darkness consumed Sarah's body and soul, leaving her trembling and inhumanly consumed by a consuming madness, John despaired, unable to comprehend the nature of this beast he could not slay.

In came BadassJesus. Boldly I descended upon the scene, a tor**** of thunder, lightning, and love, piercing the very heart of the beast and freeing Sarah's soul from this fiery abyss. And when John, overwhelmed with gratitude and awe, knelt before me to praise my holy name, I revealed to him a profound truth—that love and friendship were the greatest and most mighty of swords.

And with this reveal, Sarah and John strode together toward their radiant future, bound by vows of eternal devotion, gratitude, and cherishing the ties that bound them together as divine and inalienable, eternal friends and lovers, rescued and uplifted by my unwavering devotion to love and redemption.

imtiaz45 · Answer

Starting as friends before becoming a couple can lay a strong foundation for a relationship. Friendship allows you to know each other's true selves without the pressures of romance, building trust and understanding. You can discover shared interests, values, and how you handle challenges together, which creates a deep emotional connection. This solid base makes it easier to communicate openly and navigate the ups and downs of a romantic relationship. Plus, when you transition from friends to partners, the relationship often feels more authentic and resilient, as it's rooted in genuine companionship.

TonyV · Answer

Cause there's no expectation of how you have to act, you aren't hiding anything or doing what your "suppose" to do and the romance isn't forced or fake.

If you two can just hang out and be your true unfiltered self's as friends you know you're compatible, and then if you guys actually get close you know it will work.

Cause otherwise romance first the guy is talking corny bs like she's the most perfect girl in the world and he only has eyes for her. And the girl is going to stupid levels to appear classy and sexy like never farting around him or only eating tiny portions to seem lady like.
I am not a romantic man so romance seems pretty fucking stupid to me, just be who you are and if it works it works, it's also good if it dosent work cause then at least you aren't pretending to be something you aren't for the rest of your life to keep someone around.

DancingQueen16 · Answer

This actually describes my current relationship because me and my boyfriend had been best friends since the 6th grade but I secretly had feelings for him for years but I always thought we were way too deep in the friend zone to ever be anything more about a month after we graduated high school he told me that he liked and asked me to be his girlfriend and I said yes and we've been together for a little over 2 years now

Defnotme123 · Answer

I believe that this is a decent start because you can really get to know that person rather than just a version of themselves they'd show on a date. People try so hard to impress the person they like, and often end up turning into someone else. This way you can understand and know each other before anything serious happens.

molonski2 · Answer

That is something that has never happened for me , so I cannot comment from experience , however I guess the positive is you have a very strong initial bond , and you know all about the other party , in my case I've always found it just happens straight away or its not going to happen..

I would never have the patience.

MicahRaine · Answer

Pretty much what @saggitariusdiva said

For me and Raine, being friends before being in a relationship was great because we were able to start our relationship with comfort around each other, strong trust, great communication, similar life goals, and a great knowledge base for what each other liked in every area of life. Starting with that base is why we still have such a good and healthy relationship to this day even though we're in hard times.

Anonymous · Answer

I never done this. Cause if I see someone as a friend. I’m probably not sexually or romantically attracted to them.

I know for a fact, that if I’m attracted and infatuated with a man. Obviously it’s gonna be difficult for me to friend him. I’m gonna be completely embarrassed.

So my actions is usually go on one date, and the following date. I’d end up sleeping with him.

For me , it would be too WEIRD for me to start a friendship first.

art84 · Answer

My brother and his girlfriend started as friends dating since they used to work at the same place. Then it turned to becoming boyfriend and girlfriend and eventually getting married. Took about 2 years before them getting married and having two daughters.

dragoblack · Answer

Because you actually get to know them, that way you don't jump into a relationship with someone who doesn't want to invest any time into you, is super insecure, abusive, is a slob... etc. by taking the "friends into relationships" route, you have a higher percentage of finding a healthier and lifelong relationship. Honestly wish usa society would take this route.

SeriouslyNotSerious · Answer

It's because you know you're compatible and comfortable with each other already. There's this feeling of safeness when you just know someone deeply. And you can also just be yourself around him.

WhitneySnow · Answer

That happened to me! Worked great because we had a really close bond even before we started dating. So yeah, if you have a best friend you have feelings for, I encourage you ynot ask him out.

Smashingdoozy · Answer

Because there's no pressure to get to know each other

DrPepper12 · Answer

It's totally individualized. I ruined a great friendship by getting with her after 15 years of close friendship. I also had a ons that became a very dear friend.

LaurenM1997 · Answer

Because jumping into a relationship with someone you hardly know can go wrong believe me it’s happened to me

strateguy632 · Answer

Never ever start frend zone when you feel attracted. Start dating.

fonduegirl · Answer

Just to make sure the guy ain't a serial killer. Nowadays you can't say for sure.

paledreams · Answer

I cringe at those who only date within their friendship circle ; seems a bit off 📴

LiamJHayden · Answer

Hmm, that might work sometimes but if I am friends with her I do not look at her as a potential romantic partner.

rienna888 · Answer

it’s good so you could see how he is around around women.

ICanSmellTheCosmos · Answer

That would be ideal, yes. The metric that I use: would I still like her if she were a dude? If yes, then that's a big green flag.

Walksbehindtherows · Answer

AI sleep with atheist girls but I won't marry them.

Pohjolan · Answer

For me its not the case. If she is a friend then I don't have romantic feelings for her.

beefcakebradybatson · Answer

You get to know the person before you decide if their good partner material.

Bklynbadboy12 · Answer

So you have that foundation of friendship to build on

HappyButterfly34 · Answer

Because there is no pressure to get to know each other

DermalPunch · Answer

How about, it isn't.

Vegasrunner · Answer

Absolutely the worse thing you can do.

quickquesocheese · Answer

Its not.

Why is it good to start off as friends with a guy and then become a couple?

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Do you start off as friends then build into a relationship?

Why is it good to start off as friends with a guy and then become a couple?

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Do you start off as friends then build into a relationship?

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