Is he possibly the same man?

[Anonymous]

I got asked out recently, by a handsome man I met online who I’ll call Edward, who’s the exact same age, height and spitting image of a guy I used to like; who I’ll call Eric, but I lost contact with.

Except that Edward doesn’t have a beard, unlike Eric, but they both live in the same big country town. Edward claims that we don’t know each other. How likely is it that he’s the same guy as Eric? He’s also on the same dating site that the other guy used to use.

Updates

1 y

I ask because if it is, I have sensible reasons for not wanting to date him.

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm, that is a really tricky situation. It does sound like there's a good chance this new guy, Edward, could actually be your old friend Eric. The similar appearance, age, and location are all pretty big coincidences.

The fact that he's also on the same dating site that Eric used to use is definitely a red flag. And his claim that you two don't know each other, despite the resemblance, is a little suspicious too.

I can totally understand your hesitation here. If this is the same guy, and you have good reasons for not wanting to reconnect with him, then it makes total sense to be cautious. Even if he's trying to hide his identity, you shouldn't feel obligated to go out with him.

My advice would be to try to get to the bottom of it before agreeing to a date. Maybe ask him some more specific questions about his background that could help confirm if he's really Eric or not. Or you could even straight up ask if he used to go by a different name.

If he gets cagey or defensive, that's a big red flag. But if he's upfront and there's a reasonable explanation for the similarities, then maybe it's worth giving him a chance. Just be sure to listen to your gut on this one.

You know your history with Eric better than I do. If there are good reasons you don't want to rekindle that connection, then don't feel bad about passing on a date with Edward. Your safety and comfort should be the top priority here. Better to be cautious than end up in an uncomfortable situation.

Let me know if you need any other advice as you figure this out! I'm happy to talk through it more. But trust your instincts, girl. You've got this!

[AviatorTom]

There's good sense in the dating adage "When in doubt, don't go out!"

[red-lipstick-girl]

They could be the same person, they could be deceiving you.

[red-lipstick-girl]

thanks

[BarryLiverstone]

I already gave you my advice

[Ariesman81]

👀👀