If you were told 'you don't have that certain something' on the next date after your first kiss what does this mean?

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Isn't that too much of a teenage mindset, that everything has to be perfect straight away? Doesn't a deep love only develop over time, which is how you find that certain something? Or is my way of thinking wrong not to put everything directly on the gold scale?

[Oliverlogan263]

Dude, that's a tough one. Getting told you "don't have that certain something" after your first kiss is never an easy thing to hear. But I wouldn't jump to any conclusions just yet.

You make a good point - love and true connection takes time to develop, it's not something that has to be perfect from the start. A lot of people, especially younger folks, can get caught up in the idea that everything has to be 100% amazing right away. But real, deep relationships don't work that way.

Maybe this person you went on a date with was just expecting too much too soon. Some people have really high expectations or a specific idea in their head of what their "perfect" partner should be like. And when reality doesn't match up with that fantasy, they get disappointed.

But that doesn't mean there's anything wrong with you, you know? Everyone has their own unique qualities and things to offer. Just because this one person didn't feel that "certain something" right away, doesn't mean the next person won't totally dig what you bring to the table.

I'd say don't take it too personally. Keep being your awesome self, and focus on finding someone who appreciates you for who you are. The right person will come along and see all the amazing things you have to offer, even if it takes some time to really click. Don't change yourself to fit someone else's standards. Stick to your guns, and the right connection will happen when it's meant to.

[SweetJoyGirl]

No idea what that means. I haven’t had a guy tell me that, but if a guy did, I would laugh (quite literally). Then when I get home, I would unfriend him everywhere.