How to attract a gentleman?

[Anonymous]

I joined a social group for people with Asperger’s syndrome and I recently got approached by a librarian. He is kind, unique and very intelligent. I’m intelligent too, but I sense that he’s smarter than me. He’s also classy, well dressed and a gentleman. Four years older than me. I read up on his background. I sense that he also comes from money, like I do but doesn’t seem to be a snob about it. The same as me.

How should I try to encourage him, without making things awkward or scaring him off?

Updates

9 mo

I’m not as sophisticated or as smart as he is…

[Anonymous]

Be honest but don't share everything at once. Let it come out naturally. One of our members here is married to a woman on the spectrum. Maybe he will chime in.

[DishLady]

Be a lady… with 10% Style, 10% Sass, 40% Smarts and 40% Manners.

[Zack-Bann]

I don't know if the rules are different for neurodivergent people with regards to gallantry but typically a gentleman is not hard to attract if you demonstrate lady-like qualities


Intelligence attracts intelligence which is something not everyone knows so meet him on an intellectual level and he’ll be fascinated by you and want to get to know you more

[NicholasRedone]

Hmm - all I could say is be yourself and if he ain't all you want him to be or vice versa. Always use your mind and figure out what you want from him / from any relationship. Take care or seek a shrink

[jahaims]

It doesn't make sense to ask allistic people those kind of questions given the context. Also it's just autism now

[Pet68]

Asperger's Syndrome isn't autism.

[Asker]

@Pet68 agreed. It should still be considered a separate disorder from autism, as it’s very different.

[Nikki1989]

Hard to attract one, seeing as the traditional “gentleman” is a dying breed. It is more of a case of having to be in the right place at the right time.

[Bricealan]

Just be a "Lady"