A girl im seeing said im not a priority and it makes me feel like im an afterthought. what should I do?

[Silver89]

She and I matched on Tinder last month and our first date was amazing. Conversation just flowed naturally. A week later was our second date where things began to go downhill. I thought it was time to ask deeper question and I ask what her intentions for us were. She explains that currently she's considering polyamory and the she still has a "connection" with a guy in another state because she believes she shouldn't cut ties with someone in her past after dating someone new. Then drops her entire sexual history with zero shame at all. A part of me just died inside. In my eyes, she went from potential girlfriend to casual hookup quality. I tried to hold in my anger but it was hard just to find things to talk about now. All I could think of was why am I investing my time, money, and energy into a woman that doesn't even see me as a potential boyfriend.

We met up a 3rd time where we re-entered that topic. I asked her when is she usually free because all my plans for us get responded to with "sorry Im with friends that day". Even on V-Day and my birthday and if I dont text her, there'd be up to a week of nothing. She said she prioritizes her friends over "some random guy she barely knows" and has no intention of being monogamous unless the bond we have is strong enough. We haven't known each other long. I dont want her to drop friends for me but people put in work to get to know the person they're interested in, right? It made me feel like Im nothing to her. It hurt because I told her before that I my past dates were one sided.

I know its not worth trying to convince her to change her perspective on dating. I understand Im tolerating it is because I dont really have other women Im talking to. Part of me knows getting close is going to hurt. Another part of me just wants continue hanging out but she'll pay her half of the bill, and see her as just a friends with benefits. I hate seeing women that way but it keeps me emotionally distant. I just dont know what to do

Updates

1 y

Thanks everyone, Im no longer dealing with her

[natured]

You seem like a wonderful Man, I would not consider this woman serious enough for your being, she clearly is confused and is not ready for something like you.
You do not deserve to be pushed around like that, and just to be her little "rebound" because that's how it looks like.
You did your part, and you can tell her that, and it's up to her... but if she is not bothered to contact you then drop it.. it's not worth it, a woman that is interested will look out for you, will even initiate another date and organize it, she will text you and call you...
Hope you will find your perfect match , but do not do it on Tinder please...
Good luck

[Silver89]

Thank you. I try to be the best man I possibly can but as time goes on Im learning that type is respected less and less. Everyone that commented is pretty much saying the very things I've already been telling myself. Guess I just needed to hear it from elsewhere. My dating luck is cursed. Women I date locally barely put in any effort but I know a woman in Tokyo that actually remembered my birthday and is planning a flight just to see me

[DishLady]

Dude, she's just not for you. Sounds like you were very uncomfortable around that type of person (which I understand). She picked up on that and is putting distance between you.

[Silver89]

Thanks, I've learned she isn't for me after the second date. A part of my just wanted to tolerate it just enough so I can have my fun with her then leave. But She's not even worth entertaining any further. Ever since the 2nd date, I'm the one that grew distant from her actually.

[DishLady]

It's not worth it to "just have fun" with that type of girl bc it probably only lands you in the same STD clinic. She's not worth it.

[Silver89]

Facts

[Anonymous]

You to set boundaries and stop letting women doormat you.

[Nikki1989]

Being on Tinder was your first mistake.

[Silver89]

tell me about it. Tinder is a dumpster fire where i live. 90% of the women are in open relationships

[TheSpaceGnome]

Dump her immediately.