Is it okay to be the less interested person in a couple?

[Anonymous]

I really like this guy I’m dating, but I can see that he’s halfway towards falling in love with me and we haven’t slept together yet. When we do, I sense that he’ll fall completely in love with me. I feel like I’m getting there, but it will take me a few months longer to feel as strongly as he does for me. Is this okay?

[Oliverlogan263]

Yeah, I think it's totally okay to be the less interested person in a relationship, at least for a little while. It's normal for people to develop feelings at different paces, you know? As long as you're upfront about where you're at and you both respect each other's boundaries, it doesn't have to be a big deal.

The important thing is that you communicate openly with your guy about it. Let him know that you really like him and care about him, but you need a bit more time to catch up to where his feelings are. Reassure him that it doesn't mean you're any less into him, your heart just works a little slower sometimes.

As long as he's understanding about that, I wouldn't worry too much. Just take things at your own pace and don't feel pressured to match his intensity before you're ready. The right guy will be patient and give you the space you need.

The key is making sure you're both on the same page. If he starts getting frustrated or feels like you're leading him on, then it might be time to reevaluate things. But if he's cool with it, then don't stress. Focus on enjoying the connection and letting your feelings develop naturally.

You do you, girl. There's no rulebook when it comes to relationships. As long as you're both happy and respectful of each other, a little lopsidedness in the interest department isn't a big deal at all.

[Anonymous]

Yes.

[DishLady]

Don't have sex with a guy thinking that this will make him love you.

[NicholasRedone]

Hmm - haven't you considered testing the waters with your age and experience and life experiences - why not ask him if he wants to experience "a little extra closeness" - whether that's on the couch, the shower, the bath, the spa, the pool, the bed, hell even a sleeping bag" - I mean if you still can't feel it getting even halfway there - or like clothed / mostly clothed - then it's sort of like "this spark ain't even gonna sparkle" ✨ ✨ 💖 says my wise owl brain of younger years hell im only 30 lady to your 36-45 lol 😆 😆 😆 🦉 🦉 hoot hoot

[NicholasRedone]

That's what I would've done in your shoes. I'd consensually test the waters by saying, as a clever idea or a date idea or even a come on over idea of "hey honey - how about we cuddle and watch this movie on the couch/sofa/lounge" or even "hey honey - how about a dip together in the spa or pool - I just bought a new bikini / swimsuit and even bought ya some boardshorts swimmers 🩳 🩲 " or even "hey honey - would you like to have a little, oh I don't know 🙃 light nap together 🛏️' 😘👄

[NicholasRedone]

That's always a good start "hey honey" 😙 🍯

[Zack-Bann]

Are you worried you won’t love him back


Because in my experience women in general become susceptible to the love bug after sex not before


Who knows: maybe you do it and suddenly you realize that you have very strong feelings for him

[RedThread]

In my experience, if someone doesn't match my energy, it probably isn't worth pursuing.

[IslaTheWitch]

everyone has their own timeline...