What is your Unpopular dating advice?

[Summeroflove]

[mattthefatbat]

In all honesty and sincerety it's to literally just date the nerds lmao.

Coming from a nerd. When I say nerds I mean what most would call geeks, weird, or un popular people and sometimes not always the most eye catching people. 9 times out of 10 they have a good mindset for sustaining a good relationship with you not just for a couple days but for much longer than that. These are the types that have basically been turned down by the ones most learn to avoid later in life, earlier in their life. They're usually never coming in with baggage or problems like some of these other people have like clingy exes, kids with multiple partners, a group of friends that may not approve of you, or sometimes family issues. But I may be generalizing too much because I know everyone is different in their own way but from what I seen and experience. Nerds know love. It maybe just because of the loneliness most endure throughout school but I'm telling you. You're missing out on the Nerds

[denzooo9]

stoppp i agreee😭💕💕

[Summeroflove]

I would say quality over quantity. Having a lot of people chasing you you need to be able to pick out whose good and whose not. Because they aren’t always the right people.

When it’s few you’ll be able to better spot who genuinely is interested in you

[denzooo9]

@summeroflove i love how you said thisss💕

[Summeroflove]

@denzooo9 thanks

[denzooo9]

🫶🫶

[Anonymous]

Match her energy. If EVERY guy would do this women would be forced to be genuine with guys or they would be alone.

And yes I know there will still be manipulative women out there that will flirting with every guy under the sun. You still have to use your brain. You still have to use common sense to weed those out.

But this is the best way to meet a woman who likes you for you. Too many men today think what defines them as a man is how many women are attracted to them.🤦‍♂️

[Summeroflove]

I understand what you’re saying. But you cannot force anyone to be genuine. If someone’s forced to be anything they aren’t going to be genuine and that’s just the sad truth.

People need to find someone who is just genuine. Nobody’s perfect but people need to see the red flags and if it gets toxic leave.

[Summeroflove]

But it’s true people need to find who genuinely likes them. Not superficial and materialistic people. As well as people only with someone because they’re the best option at the time. Because I promise they will leave if they find someone else if there isn’t a genuine connection.

As well as those wanting to marry just for the sake of having kids.

[fartingspinster]

Learn to date yourself first, gain that self love then start dating. And i mean really date yourself - eat out at a restaurant by yourself, do nice things for yourself, do an activity you wanted to do. You won't accept anything less than what you give yourself.
Then start dating, but date many. Dont go by the one person at a time rule. There's no harm in dating multiple people- thats how they used to date in the 50s. Then once they grew attached to someone, they'd start narrowing down the dating until the chose someone to go steady with.
Enjoy each stage of the relationship - dont rush it. The getting to know each other/talking phase, the innocent romance, then slowly transition into the intimate moments... but really the build up to the intimate moments makes it so much better.

[BonzoInBitburg]

This is GREAT advice and well said. It's exactly what I did and things couldn't have worked out better.

[fartingspinster]

I'm glad to hear you did the same things and it worked out well for you 😍 there's hope yet for me then! Ahha

[grega239]

I do everything by myself. Tried asking women out to dates. They all said no.
Stopped talking to women and i just kept doing everything by myself.

[Nikki1989]

Date many, date often, date multiple people if you can. Never settle for the first person who comes along and NEVER wait to have sex before marriage, that is setting yourself up for a miserable disappointment.

[Summeroflove]

I think dating with the intentions to have something more is very important. But I also know some people aren’t
Compatible and it could take trial and error to find whose right.

[SteveSmith1985]

"have an open and honest conversation. Put your cards on the table first, and the other person will show you theirs. If you show vulnerable honest first, the other person will talk to you honestly and truthfully."

That ends up being the solution I suggest 80% of the time.

Just talk about things honestly. Go first. Everybody's a big chicken and are scared to go first. But its impossible to have questions about a situation, if you get them all cleared up with an "open and honest conversation..."

🙂

[Summeroflove]

The issue is people trust too fast and others never trust. Trust should develop naturally and it can be a bad sign if only one person is being vulnerable or the other is sharing TMI too fast.

Could be a sign someone’s trying to gain your trust for information they can use against you later.

[SteveSmith1985]

Dude... It's not blanket advice to be vulnerable to anybody. I use it in context. None of what you mentioned here even comes close to being applicable in the contexts in which it's used. It is not meant for any situation. That would be absurd.

[Avicenna]

Don't date someone if you aren't serious about them

[Wayneg89]

Don't try so hard. Being with someone should come easy if it's meant to work. However, that doesn't mean don't try at all. Relationships require teamwork and some effort. Just that if you're feeling like it's being forced then you're probably doing it wrong.

[Summeroflove]

I agree many people put energy into the wrong people. Especially when it’s one sided they become miserable until they realize they wasted years or their life on this person and are completely miserable

[Truthatanycost]

Skip dating all together and instead Seek first the Kingdom of God, seek a relationship with your Heavenly Father. Heal the sick, raise the dead, speak in new tongues and bring others to the only thing that truly matters, their eternal salvation. As you do this, everything else will be provided unto you and, if you wish, will be able to discern a godly person to be with (Holy Spirit will assist).

[CrazyKittyCatLady]

Talk about serious topics on your first date so everyone doesn't get 2 years in and find out the other person has different goals in life.

I am talking like questions asking if they want or how do they feel about kids, how do they feel about marriage, religion etc. This will help weed out if the person your looking for better and not waste your time or theirs.

[Shiprex]

Impress your date with comments about their clothing and style advice. Give them the latest guidance for their type and inform them of how you know you can sort their image for them.

During the date make sure to drop what things you expect to have provided for you and what how you expect them to be giving them your total attention and to be exclusive until you've decided that you can move on. That you'll be the one deciding the next steps in your time frame

[Anonymous]

Men should never pay for a female for any reason on a date.

they want to be treated equal. Their time is not more valuable than ours. They work just like us.

Don’t ever let a female use her potential for sex to cash in and use you like a prostitute unless she is 100% putting out.

[Summeroflove]

Not all women are narcissists. But narcissists definitely want what benefits themselves such as calling someone sexist for expecting them to do something but also demanding and saying men should do XYZ

[Summeroflove]

But a lot of these so called traditional women are also women wanting a easy ride many times.

[MzAsh]

Bring so much value as a woman that all a man can offer you is his undying love and loyalty.

[SixFootSexy]

Never met a woman like that. Must be nice to be your partner if it is actually as you say.

[Summeroflove]

The thing is that some people give all and get the bare minimum. I see men too who provide. Defend. Do everything a man should do to just be miserable and end up being cheated on by some deadbeat dude and she moves in with him.

I’ve seen women who did everything working two jobs and taking care of the kids. While her husband…. Sits smoking pot playing Xbox.

[Summeroflove]

The very least someone can do is be loyal and love someone. But unfortunately some people take advantage of good peope

[Summeroflove]

Sadly some people can’t even offer love or loyalty.

[NicholasRedone]

For starters, people and their hygiene habits - crikey yikes doesn't anyone see a mirror anymore or are we all vampires to our screens 👀😂😋😉 🪞 🪞 🪞 let alone due to crime rates and becoming homebody who never leave their homes lol 😆🤣

[NicholasRedone]

@summeroflove when consensually in the bedroom as two adults making love aka a man and his girlfriend or a woman and her boyfriend ; "smack the arse/ass, squeeze the tits" lol 😂 almost every man wants a submissive and almost every woman wants a dominant - lol 😆 - disclaimer; consensual acts between two love-making consenting adults only

[NicholasRedone]

@summeroflove I wish it was a common phrase - or someone's slogan ; sigh - "smack the arse, squeeze the tits" or even *smack the arse; squeeze the tits* - not the slight variation there with a slight pause of ;

[MoonFace2]

That you’re better off alone than unhappily married.

[Summeroflove]

Agreed

[Anonymous]

Stay Single become all women only wants is your money. If she isn't, she's 100% lying... and don't believe anying from what they say. Stay single my friend 😎

[Summeroflove]

Not all women are the same. Neither are all men. .

[Opinion Owner]

I dont trust women. They're getting too sneaking and too greedy

[Summeroflove]

Some women are and you shouldn’t trust anyone too fast. Neither should a woman

[Opinion Owner]

I simply don't trust women, period. Why? Because they always lie, they always cheat, and they always steal everything from you at the end. Then, they go and find the next victim and repeat. No datings for me!

[Anonymous]

Never date someone who says they’re “reformed” because sooner or later that old version is likely to return.

[masterSir]

Stop "dating" for fun or something to do. Go back to courtship. It's like dating but you're actively trying to find a spouse not just some one to hang out with and screw.

[Eempriyanka]

Always go after what you want

[Summeroflove]

The thing is people hate others for their preferences and standards and feel entitled to someone else. Even if their own standards are very high and even unreasonable….

But let the unreasonable people learn those people would make you miserable anyways being with.

[Summeroflove]

At the end of the day what everyone is looking for is different it’s called compatibility. If someone’s not attracted to you be glad they’re not wasting your time even if it’s something you feel is stupid. There is someone else who won’t have a issue with it.

People can mature over time and drop certain standards as well as gain some. As they get experience dating as well as see what they’re really wanting verses what they been taught they want.

Many people face pressure and shame for having standards. That’s why you don’t need to tell anyone what you’re looking for except those you’re trying to build with.

[Summeroflove]

Unfortunately what can happen too is other people such as well meaning friends and family members. Start projecting their ideas of a relationship on someone.

So they don’t look for what they genuinely want and end up miserable…. And much worse make someone who doesn’t deserve it miserable as well

[Anonymous]

Wait until marriage before having sex.

[Summeroflove]

Yep…. Many people absolutely refuse to have that self control. End up marrying the first person they knock up/get knocked up by that
Or having too many baby mommys or daddy’s

[Summeroflove]

Many people also don’t have sex with the kind of people they want to build a future with. They think they can find Mr. Or Mrs right later….

They end up very disappointed when the kind of people they want don’t want them and they get caught up with people who pretend to be someone
They’re not.

[Uglygaypoorcoward94]

Dont

[Dongie]

Stay single.

[Anonymous]

Don't just don't