Are polyamorus relationships sustainable long term in a healthy environement?

[Anonymous]

so this subject is really controversial so I am gonna ask that when you post here you back up your statements with facts from sources 2 at the minimum would be really great however I understand if you dont

[SteveSmith1985]

Oh... so... nobody is going to cite two sources on GAG. Good on you for trying to bring some evidence based criteria into this. But... my prediction is; that effort is doomed to fail (I'd love to be wrong about that!).

I am not going to make any statement about the sustainability of polyamorous relationships. I am not in one. I would never consider a polyamorous relationship. It does not compute for me, how anybody could want that type of relationship.

It would certainly not be healthy or sustainable FOR ME.

There are, however, people who swear that they are in a long-term healthy and sustainable polyamorous relationship... and they think its great. I feel like we might not both be the same species... but somehow, people with the same basic biology do indeed claim to feel that way. Who am I to tell them they aren't happy?

I think that you have to think fundamentally differently about relationships in order to be in a polyamorous relationship.

I guess anything is sustainable as long as everyone involved continues to want to be involved in the polyamorous relationship (just like a regular relationship. But with more participants, I guess).

I think you are likely to get a lot of personal anecdotes, as well as personal opinions.
I'm afraid you have grossly overestimated the academic rigor common on GAG.

[Asker]

i haven't anything i put in my questions is stuff i can use for later after all the perfect question is only acheived by figureing out what people on platforms like gag and gag itself that way in future questions i can better draw there questions and get really good awnsers from them

[SteveSmith1985]

It's not your question I am saying won't work. It's the idea that people will back up their answers by citing sources. That's just not the kind of ANSWERS people tend to give on GAG (the question is a good one. Citing sources would be wonderful. )

I just don't think GAG users are prepared to do the work to dig up specific sources... even if there were sources. GAG is very much an anecdotal/intuitive less... objective place.

Unfortunately, the quality of answers isn't necessarily correlated to the quality of the question. You can ask the perfect question, and still get terrible answers. (unhelpful, ignorant, incorrect, etc). It partly depends who happens to see your question. It's a bit of luck.

But I wish you luck. I hope you get your perfect question, and that the answers are as good as you're hoping.

[Asker]

ik but i still add to try

[SteveSmith1985]

I am glad to hear it! I do really wish you luck.

[MrChinaski]

Yes, and also, yes. There may be many problems in the world, but too little love isn't one of them.

Are they easy? No and also, no. They require more work and vastly more honesty than in a two-person relationship.

As with most things in life, what you get out depends on how much you are willing to put in.

Just one yogi's perspective.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Sure they are. I'm in one right now with my wife and my boyfriend. I've been with her between dating and marriage for over 20 years and with my boyfriend for over 2 years. I know another user on this site who is in an open relationship and she seems stable too.

Its all about communication and trust. It can definitely work though.

[MrChinaski]

I am very happy for you.

[Ez-Bri-Z_v2]

Thank you!

[Oldschool1981]

I'm married nine years and have been with my wife 11 years. She has a side guy that she's been seeing since before we met. She was upfront about it, so it's okay.

[Miristheiss]

No.

They are unhealthy, degenerate and cannot last... as they shouldn't.

[Ironic_Method]

Factually untrue. People are right now in happy, long lasting poly relationships. Try again.

[TheSpaceGnome]

@Ironic_Method the long lasting plus happy combo is a myth in polyamory.
Anyone claiming otherwise is a liar,

[Ironic_Method]

Hilarious that you think something like that is impossible. You sound miserable any other outcome is a lie.

[TheSpaceGnome]

@Ironic_Method Oh hey my bullshit detector went off again.

[TheSpaceGnome]

No, they create an unhealthy environment both emotionally, and from a safety standpoint.

[shortster]

Only if everyone is on board with each additional member.

[LiverOfLife]

Only if all are males.

[Renegade_Sailor]

Only when it's a closed relationship.

[Anonymous]

Two men one woman? Sure.

[Lokiion]

of course it is

[Sophia001]

Sounds good

[jahaims]

Nope