When you know someone clearly has the hots for you , the signs are there, Do you approach them first or wait for them to make the first move?

[Finchie40]

I see this girl every day when I go to work and she parks in the same parking garage as me and I notice wherever I park she parks next to me , I usually sit in my car for a little bit playing on my phone before walking into work , I caught her checking me out a few times and smiling and turns her head real fast when I look up at her , I can tell she is shy , but She is very attractive and I smile as well, She has been doing this for a few weeks now , but hasn’t walked up to me to talk , Is she expecting me to make the first move? It be different if i was actually looking to meet someone but I am not looking for a relationship with anyone at this time , but I wouldn’t mind being FWB’s with her because she is very attractive. Should I approach her or just let her make the first move considering she is the one that’s been showing clear signs she is interested in me? What would you do?

[Crimsyjo]

As a female I would want the man to make the move. I know that's "old fashioned" or clichéd or whatever but I feel if I'm putting signals that are clear out there then I'm doing my part. She is probably the same. Being CLEAR in signals but needs you to move next. It's a game of chess. Your turn.

As for not wanting a relationship? Well hopefully you want to ask her out not ask her to fuck? So everything else can come later (if dates go well sex will prob happen then discuss friends with benefits or relationship terms. But early on. So she doesn't feel betrayed thinking you wanted relationship. This discussion could happen before sex. But there's no hard and fast rule. Just let things flow naturally and then stop for a talk about it).

[Finchie40]

The only problem I am having is the fact that she is shy , if she at least made eye contact with me , I would of easily approached her , but the fact that she turns her head and is shy , I don’t know what to say to her cuz talking to shy people is like a shot in the dark , so until she locks eyes with me , I am not saying a word unless you have good advice for me lol

[Crimsyjo]

Well you could say hi and go from there. A daily hello/hi. If ste says hi back build up convo daily. If she ignores you forget it.

[blackeagle007]

I feel no one should make a move

[Crimsyjo]

@blackeagle007 in this situation? Or ever lol

[blackeagle007]

Ever. Do you think that’s fair? 😁

[Genie23]

I push them away or run away if I like someone and it turns out they're very much into me, lol. But when I wasn't allergic to dating and relationship, they would make a move on me when they felt that I am interested too. So, I didn't have to wait but yeah, I'd rather wait than take initiative.

[exitseven]

I am having this experience with a woman at the gym. When I pulled into the parking lot one day she pulls in right next to me. and one day she uses the bike next to me even though none of the other bikes were being used. There is a training room that I use a lot and I have never seen her in there before but all of a sudden she is in there while I am working out. I am very married but if I was not I would definitely go and talk to her. It does not have to be anything weird. Just ask her how things are going.

[exitseven]

Thanks for the MHO😎

[OneViewpoint]

Honestly, the chances I'd respond are slim. I'm very selective about who I associate with and keep around me. She could be gorgeous as hell. She could also be an emotional mess. Batshit crazy. Or dumber than a bag of rocks. I just don't have the desire to do the diligence required to find out most of the time. I'm not looking for a relationship. Especially with someone I work with. And I take a loooong time to vet a woman before I ever decide to pursue her.

[Finchie40]

I don’t work with her , she just parks in the same garage I park , I am not seeking a relationship either but I wouldn’t mind playing Twister with her in bed😊

[OneViewpoint]

That sounds like fun. But... what if she goes nuts after a one night stand and trashes your car? What if she shows up at your office screaming about how you fucked her and dumped her?

[AviatorTom]

Next time you see her, say Hi and see what happens.

[Joshydavid25]

Women usually want the man to make the first move.. I've had women checking me out clear as day, and that's really how far it'll go for most.. They'll look at you with all the desire in the world, but never approach, unless they really really like a guy and just can't go without seeinghow things will go.. And TBF, they've done their job honestly.. They showed clear interest and weren't shy about it and all but said "come over here"..

[Anonymous]

As a woman I fail to distinguish genuine interest from mere playfulness and have resigned from approaching men. The few times I did, they weren't interested, so for me if a man is, he will have to tell me.

[Finchie40]

Just because a few weren’t interested it doesn’t mean every guy won’t be interested, that’s the way the game goes , you win some you lose some , as for this girl she is clearly showing signs she is interested in me , but I am no mind reader , so for me to make the first move isn’t sitting well with me , even though I do find her very attractive, and I had girls approach me first before and make the first move which I was flattered about whether I was attracted to her or not , So I feel this girl should be doing the same , I gave her plenty of opportunities to do so by trying to lock eyes with her and smile but she quickly turns her head cuz she is shy , I don’t know what to say to someone that is shy , she isn’t giving me much room to play with by her being shy lol if she at least made eye contact with me and smiled like I am smiling at her , then it would be easier for me to apply her and make the first move , Shy people are sadly hard to read

[Opinion Owner]

What makes you think she is aware you like her, and what makes you think her signs are interest?

[Crimsyjo]

I agree with miss anon here. It is hard to tell a man is genuine interested and not just looking or mocking or being friendly. That's why it's a game. Woman puts out some signals. Man's turn to act upon them. And yes men do take the risk of being rejected more than woman and that's not nice but that's just how the game is played.
And @Finchie40 have you considered maybe she's not going to be right for you anyways if you find her too shy? Sounds like your used uk a faster pace of things than maybe she's ready for.
Either just say hi... or move on maybe. Not every pretty girl needs asking out.

[Finchie40]

Her actions are speaking louder than words that’s why I know she has the hots for me, she is giving off every signal and making sure she parks near me when there are plenty more open spots in the garage , there is no way it’s a coincidence, she has been doing this for a few weeks now , plus I caught her on the corner of my eye checking me out numerous times , and smiling , she is just to shy or nervous to approach me for whatever reason , I smiled at her and I know she saw me smiling because she was smiling as well and letting her know I am down to talk , so I am 99 percent positive she has the hots for me , she just is nervous to make the first move , So when I see her again , I will make the first move and say Hi to her , because I am not shy and not worried about rejection , she is hot so I figure worth a shot

[Crimsyjo]

Great!! Sounds like you got a good chance then.

[Finchie40]

I am just going to break the ice with her and say Hi and introduce myself , giving her the opportunity to make the move , otherwise I will just be friendly with her considering I don’t want a relationship, but if she wants the D , that’s fine lol

[Miristheiss]

As a man, IF I was interested back I would just go flirt and ask them out. If I didn't have any interest I'd avoid them to a degree and not give them any positive re-enforcement by being overly friendly.

[MannMitAntworten]

Historically when there exists a definitely shared interest the approach was more or less a meet in the middle kind of thing with us. In other words we simultaneously approached each other. Granted, this doesn’t necessarily mean it goes anywhere beyond that given moment into the night. This is even regardlessly of intensity. Which occurs more often than not. To be candid, it baffles me but I just chalk it up to just another woman whose itch I scratched. Even women, “nail and bail”.

[Anonymous]

Personally, I’m purposely flirting with a guy right now (I wanna screw him at least once), but I’m waiting for him to approach me. He doesn’t seem to be put off by my flirting, but I don’t know. Anyway, if you like this girl, I’d say go for it. 😊

[thegreenyogi]

I'm not the kind of woman that makes the first moves. So if someone is actively flirting with me and I like them too I will flirt back and wait for them to make the first move.

[Finchie40]

With my experiences with girls’ it’s a hit or miss if they make the first move or not , just comes down to her own confidence

[Sal_Monella]

I wait for them to "drop the handkerchief" like the really old days. You should get some sort of invitation.

[Nikki1989]

I am married, any approaching stopped a very long time ago. If they have the hots, that is not my concern.

[Anonymous]

are you sure she is interested in you? Old men nowadays assume any little thing is a sign of interest. Women smile at everyone. Trust me, I'm a woman. Its our role to be nice.

[Finchie40]

O’ pretty positive she is , by the way she glances at me and turns her head , by the way she parks next to me all the time when there are plenty of other parking spots available, , by the way she walks into work and then comes back out to her car every time , and her outfits look sexier and sexier. So I am pretty sure she has the hots for me

[Jltakk]

I don't care for games, if she's interested she can ask like an adult.

[robocop666]

I would simply say hi. Nobody cares what you say all they care about is who is saying it.

[SotiCoto]

Neither. It doesn't happen. And I'm not really concerned either. I gave up on that crap many years ago.

[Anonymous]

Well there is no such thing as a woman showing CLEAR interest. But no in general I wait for them to make the first move. I'm a firm believer in equal effort. This way when she inevitably flakes she leaves having not got the better of me.

[Anonymous]

I would wait for her to make the first move.

But in reality, no girl ever had hots for me :(

[WhitneySnow]

Neither unless I’m interested in them

[Anonymous]

why do i get the feeling men will always be stuck with this role

[sage2021]

You're still married 💍

[Finchie40]

Legally but not romantically , plus this girl is checking me out and showing signs she is interested in me , Indo find her very attractive and wouldn’t mind giving her the D lol

[Staximus]

Hot stalker alert? Haha go for it, dude

[Pohjolan]

That's hardly clear signs.

[chocolatetwopointo]

wait for the other one