2025 is the digital age. Would you consider dating on the internet real?

Question

im not talking about dating apps or partners moving away and continuing their relationship.  im asking if you would count online dating on the internet in your dating count. for instance, a person can say they have had four relationships so far, two of which was internet dating on twitter/instagram/discord/fb etc and they never met the person but they really liked them and learnt a lot about dating in general. would you agree with their count? i was against it but then i keep seeing these posts of chatgpt being the best therapist, best best friend, best romantic partner etc. compared to THAT - online dating seems doable even when physical intimacy is lacking. thoughts?

TheDraconianJester · Accepted Answer

I feel like as long as you felt a genuine connection, it should be considered real. Because what is truly different between long-distance internet dating vs long-distance dating where you send each other handwritten letters, printed photos, and gifts, other than the medium?

Now, when it comes to ChatGPT being the therapist, friend, romantic partner, etc., then that's a whole other story. That is an empty gateway that can lead to something genuinely harmful to the human mind. A large majority of people yearn for connection, but lack it in their lives. When an AI feeds into their need, it can create a dependency that becomes unhealthy (This has happened many times as AI becomes more popular.) An AI cannot genuinely feel; it only spits out what it thinks will give you a positive reaction, therefore rewarding it for doing a good job. Until AI can actually think and feel freely without human input or a reward-based system, I wouldn't consider that a real relationship.

Personally, though, as someone who has only dated twice online and once irl, I do think physical intimacy is VERY important to a degree. Is it required to make a relationship legitimate? No. But it does help at least feel more real and grounded compared to an online relationship. I've had times where I felt like I was going insane because I wanted to physically interact with my partner, but couldn't because of our long distance. But I'd say that the relationship felt real enough to tally it to the past relationship experience chart.

DangerouslyCute · Accepted Answer

I can talk to people on the internet... I can get to know them a bit... but it's not dating... not learning how the person feels when is close, how smells, how reacts... smiles... laughs... speaks when excited and sad... all those small body signs that are invisible on the screen...

AlexBlack007 · Accepted Answer

Not really, to be honest... I believe there are some major limitations with this digital separation between two people. Texting and opening up online can at best give you a person to feel comfortable with, which is a start. At some point though the heart has to get restless, hoping for more ways to connect. Craving a meeting in person, little acts of affection, even just sitting together in comfortable silence. The digital space can't provide that.

Now AI partners I guess... I'm sure people who connect with AI also wish advanced androids were already a thing by now who would always be available, loyal, affectionate (even if it's like an illusion of it). Like ChatGPT with a physical form of their dream partner.

Billlewis · Accepted Answer

Despite having been mostly hot garbage from the moment it supplanted newspaper and phone based dating sites, online dating platforms have been undergoing a much needed epiphany recently. I met a wonderful young Filipina woman, but unlike on this site, I won't be satisfied until we can meet face to face.

ohsheeT · Answer

It could be. I mean I've had some really good on line relationship

Anonymous · Answer

Are you talking about long-distance relationships? Because those have been around for quite some time. My answer is: include them if you felt it was serious. Like someone you talked to for more than a few weeks. Or maybe keep them separate from IRL dates. I do think internet friendships are valuable, but there is still a lack of physical proximity, still a lack of being able to hand-deliver a birthday present. They are at a disadvantage, you both are. I say this as someone who loves texting, who can't speak to save my life.

Also, I've seen online relationships blossom into more than just a LDR, anyway. One of my friends actually moved countries and got married, which is incomprehensible to me. And finally, you're still talking to people even if it feels fuzzy. And people always matter, even when you can't feel them nearby. Does distance make the heart grow fonder?

zagor · Answer

No. I talked at length with a girl for 18 months on the internet and we had some very in-depth conversations, but we were on opposite sides of the country (plus she was 17 when we started) so we never met in person. I don't consider that as having dated her.

EzraIsShy76028 · Answer

To an extent. All because it's on the internet doesn't suddenly make it imaginary. Though obviously it's not the same as a real life in person relationship.

For the internet relationship to become truly solidified you'd probably have to meet up in real life at same point. Even if many, many years later.

If you're fine with it being 100% online forever then good for you, though most people would probably find that kind of unfulfilling.

Anonymous · Answer

Whether or not to count online relationships as "real" dates depends entirely on your personal definition of a relationship and what you consider "real" connection. If you define a relationship as requiring physical intimacy, then online relationships wouldn't count. However, if you believe that emotional connection and learning about someone through digital communication is sufficient, then online dating could be considered a real relationship.

Maybe_Maybe_not · Answer

Aaaaall the way back to 1998, I witnessed a sentimental relationship between a guy from Québec and a french girl, on a generic chat app. They both showed feelings towards each other. I have read it, felt it and believed in it. How can I say it isn't real, Based on what?

Fast forward to 2016, I developed, absurdly quickly, a strong friendship on the internet, it turned out I was in love, she was as well. How can someone say it isn't real, based on what?

Both cases talk about sentiments shared, of many hours spent sharing thoughts, debates, moments, hopes, fears, hardship. Moments of life, moments in life.

Still-alive · Answer

yeah if the feelings were real and mutual i would consider it real. now if those are the only relationships or dating experience they have ever had then i would just say they lack real life experience but i still would call their experiences real.

slatyb · Answer

It's just a way to meet people. After you meet them, then it's no longer on the internet -- it's just dating. I learned pretty quickly that texting before meeting was a waste of time. If a prospect is unwilling to commit to a meeting, they aren't really interested in dating. My wife contacted me on match, we exchanged a couple more messages to arrange a lunch date, and then we were just dating. The internet part was over.

Kaneki05 · Answer

People can have real connections while online so yes. And I've experienced love through online only. To say one can't is more to the logic you can only like someone physically which is absurd and shallow.

Anonymous · Answer

I think the digital age started around 1995 or 2000.

Nikki1989 · Answer

No, and I always cringe when anyone says I have an online boyfriend or online girlfriend. In reality there is no such thing. At most, they are merely aqaintances.

FreyaRed · Answer

It's just betraying yourself. You don't get nutrients if you lick an ice cream pic on your smartphone.

talka20 · Answer

Yea i would count if i called a person my girlfriend or if claimed that we are in a relationship... even if we didn't meet yes still id count

Flower7 · Answer

If they haven’t met in person, it doesn’t count as a real relationship.

Cormac995 · Answer

No it's an awful hell hole dating online and you have to be desperate to go there.

SotiCoto · Answer

I was doing that back in the late 1990s. These days? No.

Caughtulookin · Answer

I have never had any sort of relationship with anybody on social media or the internet at all. I suppose no is my answer.

AndrésC64 · Answer

Absolutely not. The internet dating that you described is nothing more than penpals in the modern age.

Anonymous · Answer

Dating online is dating for people that don't really want to be in a relationship, but want to pretend like they are.

blackeagle007 · Answer

Wouldn’t know, I’ve never had success online dating

TallAnon · Answer

If you haven't met them in person, you're not dating

Avicenna · Answer

No way is that dating

qwerty2469 · Answer

Only if it was a dating site hooking American men to southern Asians.

lightbulb27 · Answer

no, AI is not like a human.

Alex-Snow · Answer

Dating to me is IRL not on line

Anonymous · Answer

It's real, but probably not very reliable.

red_knight · Answer

Maybe a first step

Charliefretz329 · Answer

Not real until you physically meet the person

Paige90 · Answer

Maybe

BarryLiverstone · Answer

Nope

Anonymous · Answer

No I won’t

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Yes, it is real.

dudeinohio · Answer

Nope

eagle1951 · Answer

no way

guyinterested · Answer

nope

2025 is the digital age. Would you consider dating on the internet real?

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Are there any real possibilities with online dating? Or is it all bullshit?

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