Guys, I’m beautiful, a virgin, have values, ambitious and a good person, but men never stay. Why don’t they value a woman like that?

[Coquette24]

I’m a 24-year-old woman. I’m attractive, hardworking, ambitious, and focused on my studies. I’m also a virgin by choice because I have strong values and I’m waiting for someone who truly respects and loves me.

Even though I try to be a good person, the men who approach me never stay.

Some only want sex, others lose interest when they realize I have self-respect and serious intentions.

Why is it that men don’t seem to appreciate a woman who is beautiful, goal-oriented, and has morals?

Is something about me pushing them away without me knowing?

I would love to hear honest opinions from both guys and girls. Thank you.

[ohsheeT]

Well you sound like the girl that every guy looks for
He loves everything about that girl appreciate and respects her.

But if that's her 24 hrs a day. It's not going to work he wants a girl that will let her hair down once in a while

Let's pretend you are doing all the above. You find a guy you really like he really like you everything is perfect and one night you let your hair down you want to feel something you want to feel his passion his romance

And you know you can trust him..
You start making out you both are down to your panties bra him to his underwear

He roles you over on top of him places your hips just right and in slow motion slies you forward and back forward and back in slow slow motion he's turn on so are you as he slide you forward and back he's now pulling your hips down so you both can now feel everything

He reaches up grabs your hair pulling you down to kiss your lips your neck your breast. And let's say you do this for about an hr until you both cum. That's
What i guy needs from you it's ok who you are and what you believe in he just needs some passion with it it doesn't matter if you go all the way or not. But he wants some form of caring and getting to hold you and treat you in a beautiful way

[RavVid]

50% of those happy brides posing for pictures in the park are unilaterally divorcing their husbands by 8 years.

That is your first problem. The problem is that we can't tell the women who want marriage to under 8 years apart from those who take who regard it as a till death do us part deal. So not surprising we are reluctant to sign up to the deal.

Back when virgin brides were more common, marriage happened fast. Given men are avoiding marriage for very good reason, being with a girl who is determined to be a virgin bride means they are resolving to not have sex. Few men will make that choice.

More the male strategy, since marriage became a dud deal, is to get the benefits without the huge bill at the end.

Plus it is always good to try before you buy. Your partner has to be liveable with and the best way of determining that is to live with them and that means sex.

You need to find a guy with the same morals and intent as yourself. Nearly all guys won't suit you for the reasons you are finding.

[MrOracle]

You aren't going after "relationship men" - you're going after "fun men." Fun men are more exciting, often better-looking, maybe make more money, etc. On the surface, they are clearly the more attractive choice - but they are NOT interested in committed relationships. These men have advantages that they have every intention of taking advantage of, and part of that means not committing to any one woman. Such men are attractive to a large number of women, which means that guy has lots of options with women. If one woman becomes a hassle to him - if she wants too much, or complains too much - he can dump her and replace her easily and quickly - so to him, why should he commit to any one girl? Why risk that, when what he's doing now minimizes his risk?

Another thing is: those guys are used to getting whatever they want from a woman - including sex. Those guys have hundreds of girls' phone numbers in their phone, and tons of matches in dating apps. If you won't give them what they want when they want it, they have many, MANY other girls who will, and you have no chance with them. These guys aren't focused on anything long-term anyway - it's all about what he can get TODAY.

You don't want to hear this, but it's the truth: you will NEVER, EVER change that guy's mind and get a commitment from him. Even if he pretends to commit, those guys don't take commitments seriously. It doesn't matter how attractive he is, it doesn't matter how much you want him, you won't be able to keep a guy like that. He's fun, but fun is ALWAYS temporary.

So, you have to be strong enough to disqualify the "fun men" from your dating pool, and only date men who are ALREADY looking for a serious, committed relationship. And, yes, those guys won't be as flashy, they won't be as exciting, they're less likely to impress your friends on Instagram or TikTok, but they're WAY more likely to commit in the first place, to take their commitment seriously, and to be there for you in the long term. They're far more likely to be good husbands and good fathers, and to have good, strong morals and values.

If you want a good long-term outcome, you have to make good long-term choices. As much as you want to date the fun guys, funs guys are short-term guys with short-term outcomes. They'll be gone in a few days, weeks, or months. You might thing you are unique and special, but in their eyes, you're just another girl, just like the thousand they have in their phone right now. They'll never value you as an individual.

If you want that, you need to only consider "relationship men", and you need to be willing to give up the "flash" and the short-term excitement. You've tried that, and you already know that it doesn't last. Well, that'll never change, so you have to change your priorities if you want long-term success.

[OneViewpoint]

First of all, beautiful, ambitious, goodness, goal oriented, and morality are all subjective labels you have awarded yourself. Have you considered that most men don't see you the way you see yourself. What have you accomplished? What makes you interesting? Other than your looks.

Do men use other labels for you? Like, self righteous, uptight, boring, preachy, delusional, or impossible to reason with? Do they approach because you look cute then leave because of your personality? Can you be fun, funny, and laugh at a joke? Or do you walk around with a chip on your shoulder? Can you carry a conversation on a broad range of topics? Speak AND listen? Or do you feel the need to fill the silence with the sound of your own voice? Do you project confidence or insecurity? Is your stance on sex your own reasoned values or are you a Christian religious freak who obnoxiously spouts bible quotes to shore up your own insecurities?

I have no idea about any of that. I'm just saying... go sit in front of the metaphorical mirror and have an honest introspective look at who you are before you go looking for your answers in other people's behavior.

[lorenzomichael]

I couldn’t tell you why sweetheart. I’m single and I never had a problem approaching and girl in school or in the street at the market, the gas station or even at the ice cream truck if I felt they were somebody I like to get to know I will try to get to know him 10 times out of 10 I got to know that person it isn’t that we don’t value those things that you possess hell my little girl 21 years old and she has all of them treats that you Possess God bless her for it. She gets approached all the time however she has a boyfriend and I’m glad for that. Don’t need the wolves coming around. Maybe you shouldn’t let a guy see these things in you other than the beauty cause us guys are real simple. We don’t want you smarter than us stronger than us. As far as being a virgin, that’s great I don’t think you need to tell him that unless it comes up, I don’t see why it would. I don’t know if this is the top one because they say that guys don’t want to hit on beautiful women because they think they’re not in their league. I always said fuck that I’m in a league all by my self and I’ll go try to hit up on them like I said it normally worked out for me, but I do have to say, my sense of humor, my personality, and just me being me pretty much sealed the deal but yeah, I was a male tramp kind of when I was young. I didn’t give a shit.

[Anonymous]

It's impossible to know without knowing you personally, but I do see a couple of red flags. You started with "Guys, I’m beautiful", which strikes me as someone who might think a little too highly of themself. It gives me the sense you might have a bit of an ego, which can be off putting. If you give off a vibe like that, a lot of guys are not going to be interested. I could be totally wrong, but just an observation.

You said you are "hardworking, ambitious, and focused on your studies". You also made it clear you're looking for something serious with a man wo is also looking for a serious relationship. What do you think a quality man who is looking for a bride wants in a woman? A provider? Someone who will bring home the bacon, as they say? Someone who would rather chase her professional ambitions than be a good mother and wife? I can tell you that's not what good men want. There are still a lot of good guys who are family men at heart. A man who wants to settle down and start a family is not looking for an ambitious career woman.

Again, I don't know you, so I could be way off base. Those are just my observations based on what you wrote here. I wish you the best.

[MisterWack]

I don’t have information from any of the relationships to be able to pinpoint an exact reason, though I would like to say that it is more complicated than a surface level “yeah that is weird”.

10 times out of 10 gentlemen will choose the lovely virgin , value having , ambitious , good woman though factors may apply. Not a single quality, most definitely not those.

My relationship ended, for a number of reasons (DM Me to learn my reasons, because it is personal and I don’t want to be recognized).

[TrimmedTip]

You're not the problem — but you are filtering out the wrong guys, and that can feel lonely.

A lot of men are drawn to beauty but aren’t mature enough to handle depth, boundaries, or commitment. When you show you’re serious about love, not just attention, it scares off the ones who aren’t ready for real connection.

It doesn’t mean you should change — it means the right kind of man hasn’t shown up yet. Keep your standards. The right one will stay because of them, not despite them.

[MannMitAntworten]

In some ways you answered your own question. Thing is, most of your feminine contemporaries are sleeping around. Essentially making it a low bar expected mainstay. Women typically are the keepers of moralistic behaviors between the sexes. Since your sisterhood is largely humping its way through their teens and early 30’s, boys then later men get used to this dynamic. It is ‘You’ as to why they do not stick around. It is because you aren’t blithely “giving it up”, so to speak. So the guys just move on elsewhere. You aren’t necessarily doomed to remain single. It just means you are going to face a challenge in seeking a noble man who equally captures and keeps your interest, too.

[aaron13547]

You are the purpose. You already know that or you wouldn't be so motivated. Never let other people make you feel like you should lower your standards. You are worth the world. Nothing comes easy and a lot of the times the more something is worth it the more difficult it is to get. Your looking for your idea of a perfect life. Most people will tell you your never going to get that, those people want you to make them right. You can have anything you want for yourself you already know that it's just going to take a lot of looking. This world is full of average people and you are looking for an uncommon person among common people... don't give up on yourself stay true to who you are but never stop learning and growing to become who you want to be. You got this!

[SotiCoto]

As I was just saying to someone else... some women grossly overestimate themselves despite being completely mediocre... while others lack confidence despite having every reason to be confident.
General rule of thumb though is a woman describing herself as "beautiful" and "good", or just about any form of hard marketing where they're self-praising constantly... they're talking shit. You're almost certainly completely mediocre and you can't keep anyone because you've grossly overselling yourself.

[samael_kmarty]

I will be honest with you. Similar to you many guys never approch anyone.
The "nice guy" who will do everything for u is sitting a job which he must love or hate, earning enough to sustain his and his parents life style.
And he want to find love he is actively looking for himself but due to becoming a nice guy, he doesn't have any looks, no dancing sence and sometimes no hope of finding someone like you. Every time he tried to approach someone he has be declared a nice guy basically friendzoned.

I know this cause I am that person.
We aren't attractive, we don't earn in millions, we don't party, many of us don't even drink, we sit at home thinking of approaching you but we know that looks matters, first impressions matters.
If u have a similar guy in your group, secretly he might have expressed his feelings to you, but you have ignored those words as you thought they where as friends only.

[Cormac995]

All of these qualities are green flags. As far as I'm concerned based on what you've said I don't see any problems so my best guess is you have either bad luck or bad taste in men maybe even a mix of the two. If you keep running into guys who aren't willing to take commitment seriously then you're finding the wrong guys.

[sinestro23]

could be multiple reasons.. plenty of people call themselves beautiful when everyone else would say otherwise. Outside of that most men have sex very high on their list so even the ones fine waiting awhile for it will still know you're inexperienced and likely not kinky/open to all the fun aspects to sex..

[BadApple69]

It’s sex… guys your age only want sex period. Stick to your values and the right guy will come along, be patient.
Also where are these guys coming from? With your morals you might need to be looking for a church going guy. The normal street rats will have no consideration for your virginity or your morals.

[Zylos]

I think it's great that you have your values and are true to them. And maybe you've just not met the right guy yet.

But maybe you come off a bit cold, unattainable, strict, boring?

Maybe it would help for you to seem a bit friendlier, more down to earth, relaxed, fun, kind?

[ChicoFromThe305]

I don't think you are the issue if everything you say is true, you either run into a lot of people that just want sex or traditional men that want to take care of a woman and you being ambitious and hardworking can make them assume you don't match their standards even if you have the rest of the qualities, personally I think you just running into a bunch of horny mfs but I guess it's for you to investigate.

[Staximus]

Don't give them any sex until you know you're going to want them around for a while. Your generation fucks like shaking hands. Most younger people have sex before they even think about getting into a relationship with the person nowadays. At least you value yourself enough to not just give yourself away. If a guy thinks you're worth waiting for then he'll wait.

[Staximus]

But if you find a good guy you better seal the deal, nobody is going to wait around for you forever

[Staximus]

And you need to take a look at how you pick guys, you're obviously picking all the wrong ones

[noohair]

Great question, I think most people have this thing where they look at another person and say, yes or no, as far as physical attraction. After that I want to see a woman’s energy or vibe. So, I would guess that there is something that you project that you don’t see and it is pushing men away. Women wanted freedom and equality. What that looks like is women giving away sex. Guys want sex, so why make a commitment? Good Luck…

[HighValue]

Does ambitious mean you will prioritize work/career over the relationship? Are you planning to wait until it is too late to start a family? What interests do you have? Anything that a man may also enjoy so you have other stuff to do together?

[Berethor]

Men don't tend to care about woman's studies and career, beauty and virginity are good traits. Looks like you only meeting men that want easy sex, you sounds like a wife material.

[Miristheiss]

What are you talking about? That is the kind of woman you marry and have a family with. I guess you are picking guys that do not want marriage, maybe they are looking to be in hook up culture.

[WhiteThought]

Men don't care how hardworking you are, ambitious you are, or how educated you are (in terms of of college and whatnot).

Men are not women. What we look for in women is not symmetrical to what women look for in men.

[exitseven]

you say you are hardworking and ambitious. Are you somebody who is obsessed with their career and look at a relationship as just a distraction?

[slatyb]

Strong values? Like what exactly? Don't imagine that your virginity makes you superior to other women. To many men, that would be a red flag.

[Vegasrunner]

That's an easy answer. You outlined a bunch of traits that don't benifit men. Outside if being attractive, men don't care about any of the other things you mentioned.

[qwerty2469]

You are looking for low class men as a high class woman. Pickup men at church or a "dorky hobby" club. Look for shy men of worth. Id say close to half the men outntherebare just like you and looking for you. You just aren't looking for them

[LiftingFencer]

I doubt this. Polls state and from my own research just taking to my employees and friends a few years back, that men want a family and a woman like you more than women would want a family or a man like you (virgin).

[Iron_Man]

what do you actually bring to the table other than being nice

[RingOfFire]

It's an impossible question to answer unless someone knows you well.

[RedInnocent69]

In your age bracket, there’s a lot more girls that aren’t. Difficult to find a guy willing to make serious sacrifices for a relationship that isn’t

[Shy_Steve]

Instead of focusing on your morals and your likes and dislikes when your with a Guy you like, Try focusing on his.

That's your problem.