What the fudge tarts?

[Anonymous]

So I have this friends with benefits we ended up catching feelings for eachother etc. so we caught feelings, we text every day, talk every day, he says I’m his and all that cheesy stuff. We aren’t in a relationship because I’m not ready for one nor is he. We both work a lot. Like a lot. So we see eachother on the weekends for a day. I like it. He’s making plans for us to do stuff, haunted houses, pumpkin patches etc. last night he was over, I’ve been doing a lot of doubles so i was tired. But when he was over I was just all over him clingy. I couldn’t help it. He’s like my safe space. He left 2 hours later because I have a 16 hour shift and another shift 8 hours later. But I cried. I freakin cried when he left. Like who am I? Why tf did I cry? Why am I so clingy? Is it just work? Or lack of sleep and lack of eating? He saw me crying held me said he’ll spend the night next time but now I don’t want him to because I want him to spend the night because he wants to not because he saw me cry because I was upset he was leaving. I don’t cry over guys!!! I can’t explain it. Am I going mad? Is that a thing? Definitely.

[HollyK21]

Lol what did you expect. No matter how emotionally void you wish you were, you’re not a robot. You can’t carry on like that so closely with someone and expect to catch no feelings. Now you’ve got to deal with it.

[HollyK21]

@Abbycado it’s so insane to me how people think they can do all this with someone but be noncommittal.

[Asker]

We are both aware we have caught feelings for eachother, we are also aware that we don’t want a relationship we both have our reasons to not just jump into something, we have both sat down and communicated on our goals and what we expect. It’s not the ‘emotional void’ that you believe is happening here. I simply was emotional over a small matter that I was concerned about and was seeking alternative perspectives. But your comment does speak volumes.

[HollyK21]

Maybe you guys had certain expectations in the beginning, but as time goes on, shit changes and you can’t help that. Mainly because once you open yourself to someone in the way you’ve opened yourself to him, there’s no going back. He is your safe space, you talk to him every day, make plans for couple-ish dates and holidays, that’s quite literally a relationship without the title on it. You two have managed to work around/through your busy schedules and whatever other reasons you both agree a relationship wouldn’t work. Like it’s already happening, girl. So why not just make it official? Does that create too much expectation or commitment? I think this is the line of questioning you should be asking yourself about now.

You say that you aren’t trying to be emotionally void, but context like this says otherwise:

“But I cried. I freakin cried when he left. Like who am I? Why tf did I cry? Why am I so clingy? Is it just work? Or lack of sleep and lack of eating?” “I don’t cry over guys!!! I can’t explain it. Am I going mad? Is that a thing?”

This is such a visceral reaction to your own feelings, which in my opinion, you’re trying to suppress when maybe that’s not the best route anymore. Like I said originally, you aren’t a robot. You can’t carry on like this for weeks, months, years, and expect feelings not to grow.

[Danny_dan92]

Sounds like you caught more feelings than he did.




That or you just love his dick




Or you’re just the clingy type

[Asker]

Perhaps all 3

[Danny_dan92]

More than likely yes

[Anonymous]

So all that and you answer your own question with the very last word. Ffs

[Asker]

So I am going mad?