Would it be appropriate to go out with someone who had their engagement broken off?

[Anonymous]

She was the one who asked me out.

[Zack-Bann]

Appropriate towards whom is the question here.


On paper: she’s single.
You’re not being a “home wrecker”


Now if she just left her fiance on the alter last night then the issue is more about “are you willing to get in the middle of an ongoing situation?”


A few years ago I met a woman and we went out.
She later told me that she was moving in with boyfriend of 4 years and got cold feet about it


So after she and I spent about 2 whole weeks having sex like rabbits the boyfriend in question started threatening to kill himself if she didn’t go back to him


I was left with an ultimatum: either make her MY girlfriend and tell him to stop contacting her
But that would mean moving her in with me as well
Or let her go back to him and give him one more chance.


So I let her go.


It’s been a long time but last I heard they’re still together.
It’s a shame though. We had outstanding chemistry.


I learned the hard way not to get in the middle of ongoing squabbles

[OneViewpoint]

Dumb question. She ain't engaged any longer. She asked you out. You are demonstrating some massive indecisiveness and lack of self confidence. If you like her, hang out. See where it goes.

First order of business... find out why she ain't engaged any more. That may be a red flag.

[Nikki1989]

The fact that an engagement ended says more about the previous relationship's fit than it does about the person's readiness for a new one. It's fine.

[Abbycado]

Why not? They are single and looking to mingle like a pringle apparently.

[Asker]

I had feelings for her when she was engaged, but kept them buried.

[Abbycado]

And that’s fine. Situations change. You did the right thing by not expressing those feelings.

Now things are different and you can. Nothing wrong with it given the circumstances.

[Asker]

Should I tell her?

[Abbycado]

I don’t think that is necessary right off the bat. I mean if things work out then maybe. You can’t help who you like.

I had a crush when I was a teen on a guy that had a girlfriend. What was I supposed to do? Not be human?

Can’t control that sometimes other than to do the right thing and suppress it and accept it. Now if things go well, in time, you can make that admission.

[jahaims]

Stupid to do unless you are just going for pussy. She is broken if she goes from being engaged straight to dating.

[jazzy34]

How long has the engagement been broken off?

[Asker]

A few months

[In_Trance]

Why would it not be appropriate?

[Asker]

Recently broke it off

[Anonymous]

Sure, if they don't mind.

[WhitneySnow]

Sure