I hate smoking and my boyfriend says I should still let him even if it makes me upset. Is he right?

[Anonymous]

I really hate smoking a lot i dont trust him bcs he himself has said that he hates it and will stop but he has always ended up smoking a puff or two and still he expects me to let it go even if it makes me upset. His entire friend circle smoke and drink excessively and im afraid he's gonna start doing that too. He says he won't but i dont trust him. what should i do

[ohsheeT]

Well you are right in hate being around people that smoke to

But I never say to much about it because I to smoke sometimes when he is truly ready he will stop

My mom was a smoker all her life she had alzheimer's and dementia. I believe smoking had to do with a lot of it in the last stages of her life she for got she was a smoker. But every once in a while she would ask me if I smoked and could she have a cigarette. I would always say yes and go to get her one and walk back in to the kitchen or living room and we would start talking about something and that moment had passed. But there were times I would walk back in to the room and she was waiting for it .

The one thing that I would not do is be the person that say no meant no and there was no way no matter what not give he one.

Many people that have smoked for ever the doctor says you need to stop right now and they do but they are so miserable , and then they die within a few weeks after that

I know a few of those people

But I also know people that had been told the same thing and I would tell them yes you need to stop but be happy

There body has done it for so long that cold turkey of away doing it kills them but if the stop and every once I. A while smoke one if needed.
I've told 2 people this and they are happy and still going strong because they are not shocking there body like the other did.

Any way you right to a point. Don't do it in a nagging way make your point and drop it it will work faster that way

If you nag all the time it will make him think about it more and want to do it more

[Zack-Bann]

You can chose not to go near him when he smokes or right after
Demand he doesn’t do it indoors or in your vicinity


But it’s childish and selfish to demand he quits something that has nothing to do with you.


I lived through that with my parents all my life.
My mom is a smoker and my dad hates that.


30 years later he finally learned that she’s gonna smoke and that needs to be ok.


Because it has nothing to do with him

[AvaRay]

No, respect in a relationship isn’t just about your comfort, it’s about honoring each other’s boundaries..

If smoking genuinely upsets u n breaks your trust, he can’t expect u to simply let it go..

True care shows in actions, not empty promises or peer pressure..

[Abbycado]

You need to make a decision. He isn't going to quit, especially if he keeps telling you he is and then doesn't. His complete social circle being smokers is going to probably make it near impossible.

[Asker]

wdym by i need to make a decision

[Anonymous]

I used to work with this chick whose husband didn't like her smoking so she did all her smoking at work. And whenever she went out for a smoke break she'd wear a hoodie (even in the summer) because she believed it kept the cigarette smell off her, and off her hair, etc.😂

[slatyb]

Maybe you shouldn't be dating him. This is a very common deal-breaker. There are plenty of guys your age who don't smoke -- the majority.

[Asker]

we've been dating for a couple years now. Breaking up over this makes me feel like id be wasting all the time we spent together.

[slatyb]

That's the fallacy of "sunk cost". Are you living with him now? If not, can you imagine living with him? How do you like kissing him?

[CherryLove007]

Get a mini air purifier and hold it to your lips and don't let him kiss you...

smoking is YUCKY

[NoDecision]

He will be smoking forever. Unless you are OK with that I would say dump him.

[Anonymous]

Simple. Leave. If you don’t trust him then why are you w him?

[dudeinohio]

He's a grown man who can make his own choices.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you need a better boyfriend.