Is it possible for a guy to not be confident in what he could bring to a long term relationship?

[Anonymous]

What is he thinking?

[Summeroflove]

A lot of people can feel insecure especially if they’re with someone that lets say…. Does a lot for them maybe they aren’t used to it.

Also, there are some people that yeah maybe they don’t have a lot to offer and they start to realize that.

[Anonymous]

Yes, but it is good he is worried about not doing enough.

[Nikki1989]

Yes it often happens, especially to men who have internalized strong societal expectations about their role in a relationship.

[Anonymous]

EVERY GUY (whether he admits to it or not) questions himself in this area. Guys just know we are judged not only by what we can provide but also by the confidence we display about it.

I have a nephew right now who has found a great woman that we hope he will marry. But he's allowing 2 things to derail that. 1. he's letting a failure of choosing a bad woman, a selfish succubi in the past affect whether he proposes to this current woman. 2. If he does propose to her (and I think he wants to) he won't do it till he achieves a level of success that he deems proper to proposing to her. Which as a guy I understand. But I try to tell him. Take it from somebody olderthan you. She wouldn't be waiting patiently if she didn't know you were the right guy for her. But her patience IS NOT unending. She will tire of waiting at some point. Don't f*** this up!

[Gobbyjobby52]

It can help with positive affirmation and focus encase a turning point is about to turn up. I would say the relationship would be healthier if both partners were mature and secure in themselves, I've read around that when one partner is insecure, needy and submissive the other partner tends to fill in and become domineering and challenging in some people out there which can break a relationship in the long term especially when kids come into the picture - divorces.

[Shiprex]

He is afraid he will do something to screw things up and doesn't want to take that risk. He doesn't feel safe that screwing up won't end things the way they are.

[jahaims]

Duh.