Is using a dating app really just like playing a slot machine?

[Anonymous]

I mean that's in the sense that you leave message after message and you get no response or for a slot machine no pay off. Then maybe you get one or two small responses or small payoffs, and you're hoping for that big payoff, but maybe it never really comes. That's particularly true on a dating app.

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[slatyb]

Not at all. "You leave message after message..." Why? Stop doing that. If you aren't getting a response, she's not interested. I dated online and learned to quickly set a meeting. If a woman wouldn't meet without extensive texting, then she was a waste of time.

[Anonymous]

I'll tell any guy that will listen that online dating is the inverse of offline dating. You virtually NEVER message a woman first. If a woman IS interested SHE WILL message you first.

It's really that simple!

And don't take it personal if you do not get a lot of messages. Most women on dating sites are not there to date ANYONE (save for that rare unicorn that they will NEVER find on a dating app.) This is why you fail when you message women. In this case, it's most definitely not you, it's them.

I wish I could get more guys to understand this. You're beating yourself up unnecessarily.

[Asker]

So what you're saying is essentially get on the dating app, pay for it and then do nothing and wait and hope that something good happens?

[Opinion Owner]

No, never pay for a dating app. Only use the free ones.

[Asker]

I don't think there are any free ones that are not even a worse scam.

[Anonymous]

as an experienced girl who has been on dating apps on and off for almost 10 years, I can confidently say that if you cannot get ANY matches or positive replies back from girls... it just means you are below average looking. Because there are guys who do get messages and matches from girls.

[Anonymous]

Dating apps are full of crap.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

I think your metaphor fits, dating apps manipulate their audience exactly like casinos, with promises of juicy rewards, which do exist but only for a selected few. Whereas big money falls in the pocket of whoever owns the slot machines.

What's even more fascinating is that people are willingly turning themselves into products browsing products on a market. And all of that without even considering being paid for that labour. The casino is so clever lol

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

As for where people get together, it's largely documented, it's at work, at school, in their own friends network, and during leisure activities

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Which also explains why dating apps are so tempting for people working with a bunch of bros or having a small network of friends, then dating apps offer them to amplify that... In theory.

Yet it produces no encounters or poor quality ones because nothing beats the quality of organic encounters

[SAMI_DABBAB]

Dating platforms are businesses, they profit from keeping people for longer, if they actually worked everyone would use them once and maybe never again

[Asker]

Yes, I know all that, but what is your point?

[SAMI_DABBAB]

My point is your point exactly, it is a slot machine , it is emotional gambling and the house will always win

[Asker]

Well, the house wins to the extent that I don't think anybody leaves, and so they keep paying, but that's not exactly winning from my standpoint.

[BadApple69]

Life is a slot machine lol.
The issue with dating apps is there are so many fake accounts, so many scammers.

[GrammariklyIncorrekt]

It's useful, but meeting someone in person is 10x better.

[MannMitAntworten]

Dating apps are great for one thing only. Casual sex.

[Anonymous]

Low odds of success and only used by the wasters of society

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

Nope.

[Asker]

Well of course you don't have that experience given the way you look and your gender.

[MissSunshine2]

Haha... it's pretty similar.

[DishLady]

Pretty much

[dudeinohio]

Yes. I'd say so.

[Jeff51]

Go meet people in real life

[Asker]

What do you think is a good place to meet people in "real life", as you put it?

[Jeff51]

Join 1 of those singles meet and greet places. Im sure you can Google it. Other might say nite club or bar. Im sure people hook up for sex but nothing long-term.

[Asker]

In the city where I live, there are none of the ones you mentioned