Does a 4-hour date with dancing, singing and hand caressing mean it went well?

[Anonymous]

I didn’t kiss her as she said she puts her guard up on first dates as she feels a guy will make a move on her and kiss her whilst she’d rather go at her own pace but she liked me caressing her wrist and I wanted to respect her boundaries.

Sounds like a good date

Sounds like a bad date

[HollyK21]

Only time will tell. If you notice she starts losing interest and pulling away, then you can have a chat with her to decide whether or not she wants to continue. None of us can tell you if her own personal boundaries were crossed, but if you were really so worried about do so then you should’ve asked.


I don’t know if you’ve watched Love on the Spectrum; but before this show I didn’t realize how abnormal it was for me to see men ask for so much consent or just trying to gauge how the date is going. “Would you like to hold hands?” “Are you feeling comfortable right now?” “Would it be alright if I kissed you?”. I know for some people that could all feel corny to address or whatever, a lot of men would just go with the vibe and hold hands, kiss etc based off that. But I think asking about things you want to assure a woman’s comfort level about is so important and respectful. Especially when you’re new to each other and she’s expressed having some concerns.


In any case, what’s done is done. I’d hope that she wouldn’t agree to a second date if the first one wasn’t to her liking, although I know some people will go on the second date just to confirm for themselves that it isn’t a match. You could be more direct and just ask her if she enjoyed herself, but that’s really it for now.

[HollyK21]

**doing so

[Asker]

I asked whether she’s comfortable, if she’s ok with me holding her hand etc and whether she wanted to stay and she said yes to all.

[HollyK21]

So if all that went down, then what’s making you unsure as to whether or not the date went well?

[Asker]

Well we live in a world where there’s always a million options

[HollyK21]

I understand we live in a world where people have a million options, however if you choose to date with that mindset then you should go into a situation already considering yourself as one of those options. Don’t rule yourself out before you even get a chance to try, otherwise what’s the point in dating? What’s the point in asking a woman numerous questions to confirm whether or not she’s having a good time, and despite her affirming that she was, you’re still need to ask outside sources about her feelings? Give her the chance to speak for herself and give yourself the chance to be a good romantic candidate.

[Asker]

Well I haven’t heard from her since as she ignored my Instagram follow request so I have my answer

[Nikki1989]

Tip: Don't seek advice from men on here, especially the anons. They will only bring you down. Keep it positive.

[Anonymous]

I don't want to be the person to tell someone there's no Santa Claus. But it sounds like there is another guy my man. She's holding you off at the moment because she has a first option (the other guy), and she wants to see where that goes first. But she will keep you as a backup if that goes bad.

Sorry man, wish I had better news. It's up to whether you want to wait on deck or not.

[Asker]

Well in the world of apps there’s always a million other options

[Opinion Owner]

That's the right attitude my man. Respect yourself!💯 I hope it works out for you man. Whatever that may be.👍💯

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

It does sound like a good date to me.

Because 4 hours sounds like a lot of time spent for people who don't know each other, it's a good sign to me.

But I'm saying this from a very limited experience in formal dating lol. All my relationships from early adulthood to now have happened organically instead.

[Asker]

How has it happened organically?

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Because I'm meeting the same people, regularly, in various places, just talking with them and... With some of them, a shared and ambiguous interest gradually emerges then we start feeling more than friendship and... There it is, the beginning of a new relationship

[Asker]

How does it happen in group settings

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Gradually, from a few interactions during group talks to more and more, that is, when we both realize we enjoy each other views

[queenofcardio]

Sounds like it went very well.

Any updates?

[Jammannn]

Sounds like simp city. Most girls sleep with guys on the first date, and research shows that those who do find relationships quicker. Not even getting a kiss? Pretty eh vibes from her then.

[Godihateyou]

It means you probably got pegged you little bitch

[In_Trance]

You're 30...