Why do I feel like women hate me and what am I doing wrong dating?

[Awesomesauce2005]

I'm 21 now and I've had just as much luck dating when I was 16. No dates at all. What am I doing wrong?

[Cleatchaser1]

No one here knows you so it's unlikely anyone can possibly give you much helpful advice. I try to take a moment to glance through people's previous questions to try and glean something about them but it's still a far cry from knowing them. You know how narrow your acceptable dating pool is based on you wanting a stay at home wife? You're entitled to want whatever you want but what percentage of women are even acceptable to you? It's a pretty small percentage. You worry about confidence a lot. It's not nothing but it's not as much having confidence as it is not making it extremely obvious you don't have any or appearing awkward. Of course no one here has ever watched you ask someone on a date so it's impossible to say what you are doing wrong there.

Some other observations: you have a disdain for probably the vast majority of women based on your previous questions and that seeps through in all your interactions I guarantee. You can always tell when a man's general attitude about women is negative. You either come across as condescending or maybe distant and serious instead of fun or relaxed and that limits who is going to be interested in you too. Personally, you seem a little too obsessed about money and that seems like your priority over dating. Your attitude is undoubtedly based on your personal experience but it's just something you have to put aside and not make obvious you assume every one of us is out to get you or whatever it is you're worried about or it just becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy because you are looking for it so intently. Everyone is someone's type no matter who you are so of course there is someone out there for you but perhaps you need to adjust where you are looking.

[Awesomesauce2005]

I only care as much as I do about money because money is security and freedom. It allows me to be more relaxed and I'm not worried about issues because I don't have any debt. I have a considerable emergency fund accumulated and a considerable investment in the stock market in energy companies and Berkshire Hathaway so I have a small passive income that keeps up with inflation. I started my own business 3 months ago so on top of working 50 hours a week I now have a decent paying job on the weekends working on European classic cars. I have always been a really upbeat person to be around. Most of my friends and aquaintences are 40-93 years old so I don't have to deal with crazy teenagers being loud and getting passed out drunk. I never smoke I never drink and I never partake in any drugs of any kind. I try to live my best and it seems as though my best still isn't enough. I keep telling myself that I'm the reason I've only had one date/girlfriend/relationship so far and maybe I'm wrong to blame myself for that. Im told by so many people that if I'm patient the right one will show up and meanwhile they dated 13 different women before they got married in their 20s. I can't help but feel like I'm somehow the problem.

[Crimsyjo]

Ok. Reading sone of your other replies to get a better sense of who you are I think you are more advanced in what you want than your peers around you. It's like inside your 21 year old self you are a matured wine. The type of women you want are not there yet. I think you will find what you are looking for but it could take a long time. Does number bother you? You say other friends may have had 13 relationships where you had one. But thats 13 failed relationships not 13 happy ever afters. If you wait a decade then get the one that lasts and is your wife isn't that more fulfilling than 10 failed relationships first?

Some people are happy to try out more "options" and see if maybe they become the one. And that's ok for them too. I think you sound like you are doing things in life that matter to you, building stability, financial security and you have friends- even if you prefer older people. Just accept that your values might mean waiting longer and if you can feel at peace with that I think your be happier. Because I do feel you will find the type of woman you want. There are women who have the same traditional views as you. So don't think badly of all women because ghe ones that don't fit are not bad people, they are just incompatible people and that's ok.

I wish you well! Your doing ok!

[Awesomesauce2005]

Wish I could make this a superb opinion because it is one 100%

[Crimsyjo]

Thank you. Your appreciation is much better than a "superb" marking by GaG anyways. Hope you feeling OK now :)

[Anonymous]

You care too much. I know it sounds backwards but the less you give a 💩 and the more you just engage women (in the right situations) the more successful you're going to be.

I learned a long time ago you cannot convince a woman of anything. She's either smart enough to see it or she isn't and if she isn't it's not going to matter if you're Chris Hemsworth.

If you feel like women hate you you're already overthinking it.

Go to where the women are, meet them on their terms (i. e. concerts and music festivals) they're just there to have a good time. Go there and have a good time as well. I get approached by at least 1 woman AT LEAST every other concert I go to. Where it goes from there is up to you. If she approached you she's already seen SOMETHING that drew her interest. If you want to approach them that's fine. But I'd be selective. Because it sounds like you're frustrated right now. I'd let them approach you and build your confidence first.

[Awesomesauce2005]

I've heard the same story from men in your age group, it's not that way anymore for my generation. Kids nowadays are too glued to their phones to build any semblance of social skill so they are terrified of approaching or being approached. I am president of a car club so I have had plenty of experience talking to large groups and individual people. I'm 21 and I've never had a woman my age approach me or even talk to me without me having to engage first. It seems like a lost cause at times but I perservere so I might get the chance to have kids and a family of my own one day.

[NathanDavis]

it's not them... it is you

because the truth us 99% of women don't even care about you... but you spend your day convincing yourself they all must hate you

therapy would be a better idea

[Awesomesauce2005]

Therapy is for wusses unless you have experienced combat.

[NathanDavis]

ah... that explains

[Anonymous]

They hate us all it's trained into them during schooling
Nothing you can do about it

[Awesomesauce2005]

Isn't that the cold hard truth. Government indoctrination at its finest. 😢

[Billlewis]

If it appears that they dislike you, you're probably trying too hard or being too obvious about your intentions.

[Alex-Snow]

You don't really give enough details to assist. Have you had any girlfriends?

[Awesomesauce2005]

1 girlfriend, 1 relationship that lasted a year till we had a disagreement upon how we should raise our future kids when we had them.

[Alex-Snow]

Maybe you were rushing things when talking about kids. Was the sex any good with her?

[Awesomesauce2005]

We never had sex in the traditional sense. I performed oral on her every date but nothing was ever reciprocated. I didn't ask for anything in return so nothing was given.

[Alex-Snow]

Sorry to hear that. I know jerking off is not as much fun as sex. Keep a positive attitude, when you least expect it the right girl will enter your life

[linka_pat307]

Nothing just you yourself isn't ready in many ways that you don't pay attention to

[Mike_Hum]

How can we know what you're doing wrong if we don't know what you're doing?