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Waste her fertile reproducing deadbeat kids, getting abused because she didn't want a green flag man because he was to safe, for her, boring etc.
3 d
Is dating women pointless if they choose emotionally unavailable, abusive men over ‘safe’ guys?
Anonymous
(25-29) 
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
7Opinion
Instead of offloading your disgust onto words, why not face your fears? Why not feel sorry for the women being so traumatized that they require an external abuser to help themselves repress their pain? ć ¤
They do it to them self & for some reason, they don't want to be saved.
May i suggest you either read alice miller's work or use AI to learn the key lessons of all her books. I mean, not just to understand these women but also yourself.
I'm already familiar it was recommended to me by a counsellor five years ago I borrowed from them.
I studied the likes of her and read books with excerpts from her books since i was 15. And only this month i will be 23 and i am succeeding fixing my childhood abuse. For past days i get internal hemorrhoids or whatever reason there's some blood on the tissue, and i get paresthesia for the second day now, low grade but consistent whole body. All because my chronic hypervigilance is going away and my blood flow goes to normal, all documented clinically proven symptoms of undoing trauma. My astigmatism is lower than it was in a decade. I woke up with a racing heart as usual today but instead of doing relaxation slow breaths, i told myself "anxiety is healthy" and then suddenly in a sleepy state i acted like a dog who fights another dog, thrashing face side to side and kicking the air. It definitely seems like i was silenced as an infant and my muscles held onto it even when my brain was incapable of forming conscious memories.
The point is, no matter how much i studied, i even studied somatic release and heard excepts of the book The Body Keeps The Score on podcasts since i was 15 too. I studied shamanism how emotional release unfucks physical illness. None of the knowledge helped.
I am saying all this because you sound like you did not apply the anxiety processing which Miller too talked about. At the very least, i usually had enough awareness not to blame women for being stuck in abuse cycles.
Everyone in the world is stuck in abuse cycles, even the most liberal and emotion friendly schools still teach you to repress free will, natural needs, disgust reactions etc.
You are familiar with religion. Nobody enters heaven unless they become like children. Children do not use ideology to excuse and explain pain, that's what clueless adults brainwash them into. Treat your pain like an infant's. Don't force a relaxation.
Do you think, until we admit "i was a junkie" and face horrors, everyone has anxiety disorders but only severely traumatized people can get diagnosed? ā
I don't know why this happens so often. I think a lot of the time it starts out as something to fill a void, a kid pops into the equation, she decides she wants to keep it and tries to include the baby's father in its life.
Some women I think it's about low self esteem. You'd be surprised how fucked up in the head a lot of people are.
I think there's also this primative thing women have where it's like if a guy doesn't make her feel like he might leave at any moment, if he values her too much then it must be because he himself is low value and therefore his affection must be fake.
I think this comes as naturally to some women as men wanting women with a low body count.
I already know part of this from dating 20 of them in 8 years.
I knew this girl who was super freaky and she was into being degraded and slapping and stuff. At first I thought it was kinda just role playing but after a while I realized she actually used it as a way to sort of accept these bad decisions she made in her life.
Not to role play a character for a few minutes but to instead convince herself she is this character: a worthless partner, deadbeat mom, sex object. And it fueled other bad decisions she made where she'd treat other people poorly.
Why do I need to be loyal or keep my word if I'm a deadbeat? I take pleasure in these qualities. And so I think she used it as a way to release herself from the pressure of having any responsibility in life.
The whole story is kinda fucked up but I did learn these things about her as I got to know her.
But I see bits and pieces of her personality in a lot of other people. That girl was just on an extreme end.
Damn sounds rough. Yeah, I don't think a lot of men & women want healthy connections.
Youāre not being rejected or ignored because youāre a good person or a āgreen flagā. Youāre being rejected or ignored because you lack social skills, dry, boring and unattractive. Iāve talked to tons of guys like you on dating sites and Iāve seen men like this irl and itās always the case that they are unattractive, awkward, lack social skills, insecure, dry, boring. Many of them, like you, think women donāt want them because theyāre a good person. Itās not. Many of them arenāt even good people although they seem to think they are.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sub 6, that not toxic.
Sounds like your type is said above
Those women, yes.
I wish guys understood that a MAJORITY of the women today simply are not dating material. Men need to understand it's a new world socially. Any guy that does not understand a woman has earn his attention and effort is in for a boatload of trouble and heartache.
Any woman that truly values will make wffort to get to know you (notice i said "get to know you". Not to be confused with the women will just try to hook you with feminine wiles). A woman that truly likes you and values you wants to understand you. The other type of woman just wants to understand how to MANIPULATE you.
It is pointless under those circumstances yes, but many girls aren't like this which can make it worth trying.
Really, every woman I've dated has ended up with one. Wasted her fertile produce deadbeats to shit bloke. š
This is only your excuse for not getting a girl. This doesn't happen irl.
Please go outside more.
So be smart and do not date these sorts of women, problem solved.
Basically the majority of them.
Basically no, because from a thousand women I knew, maybe one or two were like that.
Sounds like you lucky or they just hid it from you. literally every women I've met.
Was wired that way to worship this type of man.
I think you are obsessing on people you don't even want man 😭
Why would you want a person like that? If she doesn't want you it's a blessing in disguise if that's the case
Well, I do want a partner, but it just seems that if you're toxic immediately, you become notice & and choose, but im too much of a green flag guy. You're usually left alone.
Ohhh... had the same problem. Well, I found out that if you care too much about finding someone you look like a desperate mf. You just need to live your life and enjoy it without seeking anybody to save you. When you stop caring about it girls will start to see you, eventually somebody interested in you. I'm healing now and I'm noticing that people now have a more positive opinion about me
I'm disabled so people will never have a positive view on me regardless of my actions.
I'm sorry for your problem but give it a chance, people will notice you. Don't surrender, if you do you can't win anything.
I will be if it same when I enter my 30s. I still want to be a father, which I won't give up on that, yet.
Don't give up, I know it's annoying to hear this when you are feeling like that but someone will notice and like you one day if you start to care about yourself with the same love you'll share with the right person
Having been doing that for 25 years, my outcome is the same.
Another rerun episode on TV Land