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When i see people marry people they met off of online dating and married I'm not jealous there's a part of me that feels that that relationship probably isn't very authentic.
Because what i noticed about friends I've made through bumble bff, friendship apps are the friendships are very surface level. You're hanging out because everyone needs friends but the setting doesn't enable authentic relationship building.
And yet i do know people who have married the people they met off of online dating so I'm not sure whether it's the same or different from friendship apps
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
3Opinion
People who use and meet people on dating apps are already in the red flag zone by default. Quality people don't need dating apps, so you are basically digging through the manure. When couples do make it work, it is just pure luck more than anything else.
I don't even think it's just about like the type of people who go on there I'm saying like the type of relationship that forms from online dating can never be authentic than if you meet someone organically.
Because that person realistically has nothing to do with your life. You are almost like forcing a connection having to plan dates etc.
Whereas when you meet someone in real life you first get to know them without all of that develop feelings and then start dating
Like it reminds me of you can see the most handsome man on the planet and feel nothing for him as you barely know him and meet an average looking guy who is friends with some of your friends, hang out with her as part of your friend group and fall madly in love with him as he's already part of your life you're getting to know him organically
Online dating is for rejecting. You date people online for the sole purpose of rejecting them. But it's a chess match when you do it. You want to take them as far as you can before rejecting them/ghosting them. But you always run the risk of them doing it to you first. That's what makes it a chess match.
I meant in terms of for example I know of some who are marrying someone they met online
And I have trouble believing they truly love each other
It’s settling
Yeah but that's just because of the way women think. Women have a hard time seeing online dating as anything legitimate because she wants to be pursued. The REALITY is women have just as good of chance as finding a good man online as IRL. There's just a lot of trash online for BOTH men and women.
It's hard to find ANYONE not toxic, or at least damaged and commited to the pursuit of a real trelationship either online, or offline.
I'm turning 34 in a few months. Should I give it a shot?
Online dating? You can. Just be aware you have to wade through a lot of crap. If you're not prepared for that then you probably shouldn't.
I don't know where else to meet guys
Concerts and music festivals is where i meet most women. They walk right up to you there. It's a real relaxed atmosphere. People are drinking and having fun. Maybe it's just my age group.🤷‍♂️
Sometimes, yes. Online relationships can feel less stable because it’s easier to disconnect, but strong communication and genuine commitment can make them just as meaningful as offline relationships.
I feel a lot of it is people settling.
I agree
Like I feel for example ther eis a girl I know who is a lawyer.
I wondered who she'd marry. I figured probably some hot shot.
When I saw she married someone from online dating I felt like it's probably not someone that great.
And from what I've seen it is.
But if she met someone in real life like someone in law school for sure she'd nd up with a dream husband
I think that’s a bit of an unfair assumption. Meeting someone online doesn’t mean they’re less successful, attractive, or compatible, just like meeting someone in law school doesn’t guarantee a “dream husband.” What matters more is how good the relationship actually is.
But even otherwise I mean of course I don't know exactly what her future hubby did in school etc. but I think she would be considered more educated/successful than him.
Meeting someine in law school much much more likely to meet an equal.
That's true. The relationship could be good healthy this part I agree with.
But I feel like unlike for men when women marry, usually they like to amrry someon emore succesful than them (not always though).
For men it doesn' tmatter as much I think it's more the connection they have with the woman
Men, on the other hand, prioritize personality, attractiveness, emotional security, and compatibility.
Sometimes I wonder if that’s why men are so confused.
Those are very generic qualities how do they know who to pick
If men's criteria are broad, many kind, charming, and fun people may seem suitable at first. The real choice usually depends on shared values, timing, compatibility, and how the relationship feels over time.
But something i never understood is that like why do men not care about a woman's education her ccareer etc. because they benefit if the woman is educated career = more $ etc.
Like as a woman if I married a guy who hadn't worked hard at all in life I wouldn't see it as fair I'd looke at it as why did I have to work hard in life and he got a free pass?
So I don't get why guys don't have that resentment towards women like why do they think that if they spent a lot of time establishing career all that studying all that hard work that a woman can bypass doing all of that?
Like why would an investment banker want a trophy wife he'd want someone who also worked hard in life so that he'd not feel resentment that only one of them was doing the work
Many men do care, but some value attraction, personality, and compatibility more than matching education or career success.
But why?
Because some men don’t see career success as the main thing they need from a partner—they may already feel secure in that area and value emotional connection, attraction, and compatibility more.
But successful people are overworked and tired all the time.
Don't they want a woman who is also overworked and tired all the time so it's fair? Otherwise wouldn't they feel resentment
Fairness means both contribute, not that both must be equally stressed or overworked.
Not all relationships and friendships but definitely most of them are.
Not always. My best friend met her man on bumble. They're happily married now
Met my wife online.