The loser in a love triangle!

[Anonymous]

Two guys fighting for the affection of one girl. We were both friends with the girl and knew each other (but not how we both felt about her). He told her how he felt first but she rejected him and we hooked up days afterward. She told me about him but that she just wanted to be friends with him. So we date for a month (not knowing that he was still contacting her often). Then she does a u-turn, dumps me and ends up going out with him. This was 6 months ago! She still dates him.

I was really angry at the time. I fetl used like a pawn in her attempts to make him jealous? So I'm not hurting anymore but do I have a right to still feel resentment towards her? She has made attempts to be friends but has never apologized (I've known her years), and acts as if nothing has ever happened. I have declined to communicate with her and don't plan to. But isn't this a genuine reason to not want any sort of friendship with her or should I let it go? If I never had to see her again it wouldn't bother me but we've lots of mutual friends so our paths do cross from time to time?

[Anonymous]

It's perfectly normal. A girl did something similar to that with me.

Just be polite, but excuse yourself whenever she contacts you, just like everyone else said. You don't want to give her any reason to go to your mutual friends and call you a jackass, etc.

My ex ruined some of my good friendships after the breakup, and only now have some of them begun to realize that she was full of it.

Sometimes you learn who your friends really are the hard way.

[Anonymous]

she sounds like a bitch. but instead of cutting her from your life.. you should stay friends. but on a limited basis. so just pretend like you're busy when you don'r want to see her. when you do hang with her, make sure you've got a hot chick with you. you've got to date a couple girls.. make her a little jealous. and show her what she's missing. get your revenge like that..

[BirdofParadise]

I doubt she used you to make him jealous, she was the one who rejected him in the first place. But if you don't feel like being friends with her, that is completely understandable. Whenever you run into her just take the high road, be polite, acknowledge that she is there... but you have no obligation to talk to her if you don't want to. If she comes over and talks to you, just excuse yourself and walk away.

[martyfellow]

She probably didn't do that deliberately, just to make you jealous. But girls don't have to apologize for changing their mind. It could be no more complciated than that he has more money...

One reason I opted out of traditional dating as a teenager. This double standard, that girls can do whatever but guys are supposed to be loyal, is one of the worst parts of the dating scene..

[martyfellow]

Isn't this the best answer?

[Iamnobody]

let it go. I recently found out one of my best childhood friends had been hitting on my ex and I was livid as I still loved her very much. but ultimately we have no control over others' choices and if she wants to date him, nothing is going to stop her. just drop them both and move on. it'll be better for you.