I agree, except as to " chances are, you only like this girl because of her looks."
To be more accurate, "chances are" a guy "only prefers" her because of her looks. That is to say, all else equal (personality, finances, intelligence, etc.), a hot woman is preferable to an average or unattractive woman. Yet, that's NOT to say that a man is interested in a woman that's hot ONLY because she's hot.
Yes, that's a frustrating reality for women to deal with. Ideally, women would like to point to a super hot, uneducated, broke, aspiration-less, passionless, untalented, woman with no sex drive and full-blown manic bipolar, anti-social personality, and narcissistic personality disorder and say, "aha! You see, it's true! Men ONLY CARE ABOUT LOOKS!"
Unfortunately, that's not the case. No degree of beautiful can make up for being a complete b*tch.
Now, back to your primary thesis.
I completely agree. For some reason, people in America feel this sense of entitlement. "I'm entitled to the perfect man." "I'm entitled to a super-hot model/stripper girlfriend who's clit is located in the back of her tongue."
The truth is, we all live in a marketplace. We are sellers of ourselves, and buyers of others. Our purchasing power is determined by how much currency we have to offer. The more value we have to exchange, the more value we can receive. A seller of a Ferrari won't be willing to "give you a deal" just because you "really want" or "feel you deserve" a Ferrari. The seller wants $285,000. You have that? The Ferrari is yours. Don't have that? You have to start coping with life and learning how to enjoy living with a Honda.
The dynamic is not purely a male problem, which is what I think the QA was trying to highlight. Women face the same problem. A young hot and sexy woman with a high sex drive, who is sweet, caring, honest, uninhibited, and intellectually intelligent is able to trade herself in return for a man "literally" worth $1,556,283 (in present value terms). An older, ugly and unattractive woman with a low sex drive, who is manipulative, sneaky, controlling, selfish, self-centered, inhibited, and only "emotionally" intelligent is able to trade herself in return for a man worth only $657,097 (in present value terms).
Nobody can "rightfully" blame or be mad at the buyer for not being an idiot who is willing to GIVE MORE in return for GETTING LESS. Assuming a fair trade, the only person that's left to blame for not being with the person you want is the "seller," either because (1) the seller has unrealistically high expectations, or because (2) the seller simply doesn't have enough value that he's putting into the deal in order to make sense for the other side to be interesting in giving what they have to offer in return for what the buyer has to offer.
Absolutely nothing wrong with that.
Like a ladies man, why should he settle or remain faithful with one girl? When he can sleep with many?
It's like having super powers and being told not to use them. Get that hot guy, use your super powers.
I don't agree with this at all, maybe I misunderstand the question.
But, if I'm correct, what you're saying is that attractive people should
only date attractive people? And, that no unattractive person should
hold out hope of dating someone they're attracted to, especially if they're
quote "hot", is that what you're saying?
I hope not, because people are allowed to be attracted to and or date
whoever they want! And, this whole only dating in your "league" thing
is SO stupid! I know must people hate celebrities, but hollywood is the
place of the rich and the vain! So, tell me why was Katy Perry married to
Russell Brand? Those two couldn't be more different in looks or personality
if they tried! What about Beth Stern, Howard Stern's wife? She's a (I think a ex)
model who's attractive and he's the guy with the potty mouth who wears sunglasses
indoors lol. But, yet somehow they made a love connection. My point is, in the one
place where things like attractness and "leagues" matter. Is usually the one place
where you look at a couple and think "how'd they get togther?". You know how, because
they had a connection and connection is what matters. I could say more, but I think
made my point. It's not about "hot dating hot" or "nerd dating nerd", it's just about
the chemistry,compatibilty and connection! And, you can have any and or ALL of those
things, with ANYONE! Just how I feel.
They aren't in the girl's position so they think they can assume whatever they want.You are right about this.Hot girls have the right to demand a hot guy.She works hard for it.Everyone isn't just beautiful for no reasons.They put effort to look good.As for me I know my scale.I never demand someone who is outside my league unless if he is the one who start to approach me.That's a different story.Those whiners are just selfish who want to be accepted but they don't even want to accept themselves.If they do why don't they date someone who is in their league?
Doesn't it just mean that your dating pool is larger since you are able to get a good looking guy? Maybe you will find that the "hot" guys aren't exactly the type your really looking for.
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Because historically women have chosen men for how USEFUL they are. How much they have achieved in life. Men are defined by their JOB in society.
This is why money, intelligence and status, in a guy, is so important to so many women.
Men have always been working their ass off because their job was their identity.
If they were working hard and were succesful, they would be rewarded by the love of a good looking woman. Whether she was smart or successful or not was irrelevant for men.
(it's easy to check because most billionaires have a hot wife even though they are old and ugly)
Women on the other side, have always been praised for their appearance mainly in society. People will ALWAYS judge a female's appareance no matter the context and no matter her job. It doesn't matter if she is a billionaire and owns a huge company. She is a woman, and men will judge her on her looks mainly.
Their role was not to work hard and have a useful job, back in the days. Their role was to give birth and be a good mother.
A good looking wife would give birth to good looking kids, while the father would be able to provide for the family because he was a hard worker and great achiever.
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Conclusion:
Historically,
- Men were expected to BE SUCCESSFUL = USEFUL and were rewarded as such by women (remember the billionaires...)
- Women are asked to be beautiful and be good mothers, and are rewarded as such by men.
They ARE EXPECTED to be good looking. That's why we have always chosen you based on THAT.
That's why women who are MAINLY concerned about a guys physical appearance, are looked down upon by men AND other women.
if the hot guy is low class, has no values, and has womanizing traits or has substance abuse problems, should we not have the right to get fed up and angry?
women can chose a hot man all she wants, but she should also know which ones to stay away from, which a lot of them don't and date whoever, just because the guy is hot.
what about everything that matters? a lot of "not as hot" but still moderately good looking guys have a lot of better things going for them but are still ignored because they aren't physically buff enough or hot enough for half of these girls, which is just simply wrong. again, what about everything else about the guy that actually matters?
1. Looks don't make you like a girl, they attract you to a girl, then her personality/etc either makes you like her or you dislike her.
2. Sure! Why shouldn't a hot girl date a hot guy? If you're an 8, date 8's. If you're a 9, why wouldn't you date 9's? As long as the girl isn't just getting picked for sex by the top guys (which gives an inflated sense of self-worth on the dating market) then it works out fine.
It's funny because guys always whine about girls wanting hot guys yet everyone knows damn well if a 400lb girl came up to them all of a sudden it's "Well... we live in two totally different worlds" and they will deny up and down that her weight is the reason.
Well I don't think it is write for you to criticize these guys but girls have the right to pick and choose who they want to be with guys even if they are decent looking don't have that luxury in the dating world favors women not men I mean it's human nature to want to be loved men have feelings to you know try taking a walk in a mans shoes because trust me I have seen attractive girls date unattractive guys or attractive guys date unattractive girls it's also preference what may be ugly to you may attractive to another but I do believe people should take proper care of their appearance like workout, wear nice clothing, get a decent hair cut if they feel they deserve an attractive mate.
I think the problem is that almost every girl thinks she is hot and deserves the best. You see it a lot one here actually. It's the 80/20 thing some people refer to.
I wouldn't say guys are THAT much different, but they do the approaching, average and all.
I see hot girls with ugly guys and ugly girls with hot guys all the time. The only thing that will always ruin a guy's chances is lack of confidence/assertiveness.
Also, most girls wear make-up. If you're going to be fair about this, you have to compare a girl without make-up to a guy without make-up. Most guys are dazzled by a girl's make-up though lol.
People should go with who-ever they want to go with. The only people who whine about stuff like that or age gaps are those who can't get a partner if their life depended on it.
And who gives a rats ass what they think because it all comes down to jealousy. Why else would they care about who dates who or if a 35 year old is screwing a 25 year old? Because they can't so what else is there to do...
but whine, and GaG has it's share of those
Harvey - you're right. Guys are thirsty as f*** and base it on looks ALONE in terms of pursuing a relationship.
I agree that looks are important for women and men. But the reality is men are not judges as heavily on looks. Just the way it is.
I'm with you on this. Why are you so interested in these hot girls, anyway? Oh, right...because they're hot! Kind of why they're interested in hot guys, no? F***ing hypocrites, man...
They, certainly, should, but they should also need to stop pretending to put personality over everything else. Men and women are really the same in this category.
Well, you answered your own question, because they are girls not women.
Anyways, some of the "hottest" girls I know are people I would never date because they are also the most ugly.
you are so right! but there might be exceptions, I mean you never know ahah
I'm not. I'm a hot guy and I have fun with dating hot girls.
and how do you know if you are ugly or not to the girl you are interested in?
Everyone is free to do whatever they wish.
You are so right.
You see the guys that complain are ugly.
Exactly.
Go for the hot guy is my motto
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