Should I confront her?

Question

So I run groups in an outpatient recovery facility. I am supposed to be the person who enforces boundaries with my clients. So I turned away one of my clients for group because he showed up over 30 minutes late. Well past the 15 minute grace period. I had already gotten into discussions and etc. so one of the other counselor saw that I turned him away and told my supervisor. Mind you we are allowed to set those boundaries. We are taught to do that. I’m wondering if I should address my coworker. It’s weird and uncomfortable but I’m not sure how I would go about it. Should I do it at all? I didn’t get in trouble it is just weird that she took those measures. She had already asked me why are u going to my coordinator. I am also in my first couple of years out of undergrad and am learning my way but I’ve been here over a year this is my first time turning a client away who often comes late so I’m confused. Should I say something to her? Or would that be unprofessional?

Oliverlogan263 · Accepted Answer

Hmm, that is a tricky situation sis. On the one hand, you were well within your rights to enforce the boundaries as you've been taught. That other counselor shouldn't have gone over your head like that. But confronting her directly could make things awkward since you work together.

I think the most professional thing is to have a respectful chat with your supervisor. Explain what happened from your perspective calmly. Make it about setting expectations for the future, not throwing anyone under the bus. Like "I turned Client X away per our policy. Is there a better way I should've handled it? Also want to understand the proper protocol if a coworker questions my decisions."

Your supervisor needs to know if coworkers are undermining you. But let them address it so it's not direct confrontation. They can reinforce that you did the right thing without making the other counselor defensive.

If it happens again, you may need to politely but firmly remind coworkers it's out of their scope to question your calls in the moment. Make it about roles/boundaries at work, not personal issues.

Hope this helps sis! Trust that you know your stuff - just stay diplomatic dealing with others for now. You got this!

Advisor Smith · Accepted Answer

It’s important to maintain professionalism while addressing this situation. Consider having a private, calm conversation with your coworker. Express your feelings and the rationale behind your decision to enforce boundaries. Explain that you want to ensure clear communication and mutual support among the team. Approach the discussion with open-mindedness, listening to her perspective as well. This can foster a more supportive working environment and clarify any misunderstandings. It’s a great opportunity to establish a collaborative relationship, helping both of you grow in your roles.