Can you make me laugh? Tell me your best joke?

Question

Having a bad day, need something to make me smile

NamerOfStars · Accepted Answer

A man goes out and buys a parrot, but upon getting it home, discovers that it's horribly foul-mouthed. Every other word is says is profane or obscene, and even the exceptions are impolite. He tries everything he can think of, but nothing helps. He reads books, talks to experts, and consults the internet, to no avail. Finally, in a moment of frustration, he flings open the freezer door, tosses the bird inside, and slams it closed. A minute passes, and he calms down, and opens the door again. A changed bird walks out- it looks down at the floor as it says "I want to apologize for my behavior. I know that my language has upset you, and I assure you that I'll be doing my best to improve it going forward."

The man is absolutely stunned, and can only stare in confusion. The bird lifts its eyes to him and timidly says "May I ask what the chicken did?".

Fireguy17 · Accepted Answer

So this sandwich goes into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and orders a drink. The bartender looks at him and say, sorry, we don't serve food here. Sorry, bad dad joke.

SweetDumplings · Accepted Answer

A woman was walking alone in a forest, she came across a frozen snake, she took the snake home and nursed it back to health, the snake then bit her, as she laid on the floor dying she asked the snake "why" the snake responded with "bitch you knew I was a snake"

linka_pat307 · Accepted Answer

Even the worst has the best, what could be worst than the clever students failing exams yet she knows she passed and be ashamed because of showing off

newfreshstart · Answer

A bear walks into a bar and says, “Give me a whiskey and … cola.” “Why the big pause?” asks the bartender. The bear shrugged. “I’m not sure; I was born with them.”

theelegantman · Answer

His neighbor asked Nasreddin Hodja for his donkey. Hodja said that the donkey is not at home. Just then, the voice of the donkey came from the barn, his neighbor said, "Oh, hodja, does it suit you, to lie to me. hodja said ''Do you believe my words or do you believe the donkey's words?"

MCheetah · Answer

I don't have any jokes or ways to make anyone laugh. All the 20 year old women aren't back from Spring Break yet and most guys don't like it when you show them that body part.

Still-alive · Answer

ok what did one saggy boob say to the other? If we get any lower they'll think we're nuts!

GoPhuckYaself · Answer

That's pretty hard to do. Not much in life is funny tbh. But watch impractical Jokers Joe the cave rat in YouTube

ChiTownLov · Answer

So, my buddy David had his ID stolen recently. So, we call him Dav now.

boobliker · Answer

think of a monkey sitting the other side of the desk asking the questions and you have to answer in chimp to get the day done.

jahaims · Answer

Ever tried to watch a stand up special? If you aren't easily offended that is a good way to get a laugh.

Anonymous · Answer

Naaah can't make you smile lol If you smile, stars of the sky will fall

JOSHUAGIVEANSWERS89 · Answer

Why do chicken not wear underwear... Their pesker is on their face

OneManOnly01 · Answer

No I can't

Can you make me laugh? Tell me your best joke?

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Can you make me laugh? Tell me your best joke?

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