My parents walked in on me and my boyfriend?

[Anonymous]

My parents are extremely mad at me and my boyfriend. Though, I know where they're coming from, I really don't know what to do. I'm a 16 and my boyfriend is 17. About two weeks ago, I brought him home when my parents weren't there (we pretty much planned it). We were about to have sex, but we quickly changed our minds because we did not want to risk it at all. As we were changing back into our clothes, my dad suddenly came home, and we were in panic. My boyfriend hid in the closet, and I quickly changed and went down the stairs. Well, of course my dad went to my room and opened my closet and saw my boyfriend. He started freaking out and told him to leave, and he started to yell at me. My mom came home and it was the same case. I know it was VERY stupid on my part, and I really did learn my lesson. I took advantage of all of the oppurtunities they have given me, especially the chance of having a boyfriend. Now, they took away a lot of my thinks, which is understandable. I don't have my phone anymore, I'm not allowed to drive, I'm not allowed to see my boyfriend, and he's not allowed over. I'm not allowed to go anywhere either. What really upsetted me was that they told me that I'm not allowed to join the next track or cross country season! I understand all of the other things, but I really don't want running to be taken away from me too. My mom talks to me as if nothing happened, but gives me lectures and brings it up so I can understand the huge mistake I did. My dad can barely talk to me, and he hates my boyfriend (my mom is a bit more forgiving and she still likes my boyfriend, but just upset on the choices we have made). I wrote them a 7 page letter about what happened, and about how sorry I am for trying to have sex. I tried to convince them that we didn't do it, but of course they're my parents and won't believe me. They are my parents after all. I really need advice on how to get my trust from them again. I'll give up everything else, but I don't want tra

Updates

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*I don't want track and cross country to be taken away from me. I want to have some time with my boyfriend, and I know it is very stubborn of me for trying to see him even when I'm grounded. I don't want them to hate him so much, because he's a great guy, and all of this was my fault anyways. I want them to trust me and at least give me a bit more permission to do some things. I have my priorities straight, and we have learned our lesson. Will we ever be trusted again?

[AleDeEurope]

One thing my father told me that has really stuck with me was: "When trust is lost, regaining that trust back, is one of the most difficult things to do."
He's right, and that's what's going on with you right now.

They trusted you when they left you alone in the house, you took it for granted and screwed up. You say you learnt your lesson, but you also told them they could trust you, so how are they supposed to believe you when you say you've learnt your lesson, when you previously lied?
And it's a big issue, that's why it's even worse.

You can write 7, 20, 50, 100 pages apologizing if you want, but you gotta show it. Words mean nothing if your actions show the opposite.
You got your punishment and you gotta deal with that, so just act right, follow the rules, do what your parents tell you, and hope they let you join the track team, but there's nothing else you can do. You wanted to act like an adult, then face the consequences like an adult.

[Asker]

You're right. I made a mistake, and I have to work harder to regain their trust. I have to deal with it, and just hope that things get better over time. Even if it takes a very very long time.

[bryon]

Trust once broken is hard to get back. Try this ( attemp to regain track ) being you stated that your mom is more reasonable and more forgiving. Have a one on one with her and explain how to are understanding and accept you punishments that they gave but would they lease consider not forbidding you from track / running. But for petes sake if your going to use this time to see your boyfriend be aware try can arrange for you to be spied on and if you think re gaining trust is hard just wait and see how bad it will be if they find you two were together.

[Anonymous]

With fascist parents, you either have to train them, earn their trust or side step them.
I think you understand the first two options, which means doing EVERYTHING they say, regardless of your whining wishes. If he was The One, he wouldn't have participated.

Side stepping is not tricky in this case.
You follow ALL their rules and this extra time will be spent on academics and training solo to stay in shape.
Your goal now is to enter college ASAP, even scholarships (in case they refuse to pay). In college, all your wishes will be finally fulfilled.

[Luv2BRealExotic13]

They just want their little girl to be safe and not have to worry about those things till you're old enough. They dont need their child auditioning for another season of mom at 16. I guess you just abide by their rules or have a conversation with them about it not just a seven page letter, seems to me they know you dont care too much about everything else being taken from you so theyre just hitting you were it hurts most for you to really learn your lesson. Getting them to change their minds might take moving heaven and earth.

[Asker]

I did have a conversation with them, especially my mom. I tried to have a conversation with my dad, but he just wouldn't listen. I understand where they're coming from, they don't want me to mess up my life so soon. It really does hurt having what I like the most taken away, but after all I do have to face the consequences.

[MysteriousFlower]

If I have a daughter, I would be most pissed off if there was no protection. Be practical kid, and there is no point of trying to convince them. You explained yourself and leave it to that, next time get a hotel or even better- wait for a little more while.

[Anonymous]

Well i understand you, but suffocating not always good for your personality, my mom beat me once when she knew that i liked a girl, i still remember, it was bad, i went to school next day and everybody asked me what happened to my hand and face, i told them its my younger brother, well i dont have one. Anyway i grow up and she still try to control me untik i ran away to another country, and now im still suffering fron these memories, im not able to help myself. I can't be part of that life anymore.

[throwit]

Your parents sound like assholes. This is a bit extreme

[Asker]

They are a tad bit strict, but I do agree that they did take it a bit too far.

[Pink2000]

First of all this could've been prevented as you obviously know. But how was it so easy for him to just come over. My parents are just like yours. They can be strict.

[Anonymous]

Just give it some time. Lay low, help out around the house, and try to do things that'll make them happy. And next time be a bit more open with your parents, though I'm sure you understand that.

[Asker]

Definitely!

[Anonymous]

Maybe dad would of joined in if he caught you legs high or banging doggie

[MisterDude007]

that happen to me a couple times when I was ur age lol

[Asker]

Oh boy. Did it ever end up with any sort of punishment?

[MisterDude007]

I was the dude in the closet.. n noo but I'm sure she did..

[Hannah233]

It's fine, I knkw any parents would do the same thing.

[tyber1]

Your parents need to chill the fuck out.

[Pink2000]

They are looking out for her well being

[tyber1]

No, they think they are. They are doing more to harm her than she was doing herself.

[fulloflife]

Why was he allowed to come in the first place?
😕

[Asker]

Well, he wasn't necessarily allowed to come over that day. I mean, we were going to go out later that day, but we had a half day at school, and I decided to bring him home rather than wait for my parents to come home so he can actually be there. As I said, huge mistake.

[fulloflife]

Oh ok

[Pink2000]

That's a good question

[Noxifer626]

Well, your parents suck.

[93stepsawayfromhome]

Your parents are too harsh.

[jmmmfi2]

It'll take time