What do you do when someone is spreading false rumours about you?

[Anonymous]

A girl that’s a year older than me started spreading fake things about me because she hates me, what do I do? I don’t want everyone to hate me and I don’t want the guy I like to think what she says is true? What am I meant to do?

[UghPleaseKillMe]

I was in the same situation a week ago.
Confront her and tell her she's mentally deranged. Make her ashamed of herself. Bonus points if you do it in public so that people know the rumors were false. She'll probably be like "what are you talking about?" so it's important to have some people who heard the rumor around, in case she contradicts her own story.
Some may still believe the rumors, but they're probably that girl's friends so they're not important to you.

[Asker]

I don’t want to confront her because she is insane

[Asker]

And also what if the boy I like believes the rumours since he has been friends with her for a while

[ak667]

I think ignoring it is the best option. Be the bigger person. That's unless you also possess guile and mean-spirited mindset to stoop to her level and fight her back that way. But if you don't, then I think it's better to ignore, not get defensive, and just demonstrate to those who pay attention that this obviously isn't the case.

[ak667]

Might require some extra contextual info but the thing about those types is that they usually do end up digging a hole too deep to climb out of if people don't play back at them. If you get on the defensive though, then that's sort of acknowledging the damage they intend to cause, and it can put you in worse footing than you started since it's obviously getting to you. Unfortunately those types will tend to do some damage being so underhanded and on the offensive (they might create a rift among your allies). But the strongest defense unless you have the ability to actually counter-attack is to ignore as I see it. Fortify yourself to be as immune to the harm they intend to cause as possible. That's going to typically accelerate the rate at which they dig their own hole.

[Asker]

I do ignore her but I’m worried because the guy I like and people that I want to be friends with I feel like she will purposely jerpedise my new relations

[ak667]

It's kind of damage control unfortunately as I see it unless you can confront her and have some effect that way. But those types are troublesome especially if you have no dishonorable fiber in your being. The damage control route as I see it is just ignore, keep your chin up, and let people see that what she says about you and the way you act seem very different.

[Asker]

Yeah you’re right, that’s the best way

[SydneyTW]

This happened to me in high school and ruined the year for me. The rumor was a very harmful one and she even asked if we could be friends still. We weren't even friends to begin with. She cried in the vice principal's office so the adults thought that I was in the wrong. Very frustrating. If you're in school, talk to the principal, because it shows her that you're not afraid to get her in trouble.

[Asker]

What was the rumour

[SydneyTW]

I'd rather not say. It's a tender topic. People don't know the whole story, so they judge harshly.

[luvstoned4him]

I figure if the guy really cares about you he will spot this fakeness from a mile. Gossiping is never cute and I find it to be really low of character. You can approach her and tell her to desist or you can just ignore and go about your business. When you try to fight against those kind of characters it gives them strength when you ignore they lose power.

[Asker]

Yeah I won’t say anything to her because she wants that to be honest

[Asker]

Also the thing is the guy has been friends with the girl for ages and he doesn’t know me very well so I’m scared he would just believe her without trying to get to know me

[luvstoned4him]

@Kazzza am guessing she is just jealous

[Asker]

She hates me because 8 months ago her boyfriend said to me he was single and we kissed and I didn’t even know she existed and now she hates me and she tells everyone that and tells people I’m a slut

[luvstoned4him]

@Asker sad life. thats why I do background checks on men. I just dont run in all at once. I had a ton of guys with girlfriends try to trick me into thinking they are single. "We breaking up", "I want you more", "I like her but I dont love her", "She was cheating one me" - I've it all and am thankful I didn't give into those BS even once.

[luvstoned4him]

@Asker but she is definitely holding a grudge and Women act like if women are the problem. Her man knew he was taken and he didn't respect her enough to keep from you. She should be glad for this experience which was an eye opener for her and she should consider talking to or dumping him.

[Asker]

Hahahaha yep he used the “she was cheating on me” 😂😂😂

[Asker]

Nope she got back with him and decided to ruin my life 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

[luvstoned4him]

@Asker smh well forget her. she can go to hell. Just try to live your best life.

[Asker]

Thank you ❤️

[luvstoned4him]

your welcome @Asker

[Annie26]

I’ve gone through this. Just ignore whatever she is doing. When someone throws dirt at you, you indirectly find out who your real friends are, coz at the end they’ll be the only ones standing with you. And that’s all that should matter. Real friendship instead of a fake circle.

[Asker]

But what about the guy she tells him things before he can get to know me

[Alice2398]

Once a girl speard a rumour but me and my best friend were lesbians together so I just said yeah we are, what it to you? Have you got problem with that or something? I'm not but I thought Itvwas so stupid of people to come up asking me if it was ture because if it was what would it matter anyway its none of their business and I just made them looked bad and exposed their homophobic ways to everyone else. I don't care what others think of me and usually if i hear something un ture about me I laugh it off and say "wow I didn't even know that one about myself"

[summit33]

Tell him the truth and if he doesn’t believe you then he’s not worth it and for the girl she’s trying to get a rise out of you and if she does then she won. Never pay attention to rumors once you do and you show her that it bothers you then she will get exactly what she wanted and bullies like that won’t stop if she sees that she’s winning

[Factshurt90]

Nothing. People don’t care about me. So why would I care what they thought of me?
In HS it was rumored I did something to this guy because He was dating me🙄
I didn’t dispel the rumor because I didn’t care. Even had people yelling “dick sucking whore” at me out the bus window. I was a Virgin at the time. 😂
My friends were surprised how calm and unfazed I was by the rumor.

[GoodManDave]

Try to both ignore it and show that it’s not true by trying to be the best I can be. Unfortunately some “friends” will believe it... and are quick to spread it, even when thy have an inkling it’s not true.

Then it’s high time to look for different (real) friends.

[Eryxx]

I don't give a damn. Someone spread something about me and the others just believed it? I mean, how do people know if it is relevant? If people can really be that dumb to hear what other's say then that's their issue. But if they bother to come up to me and confront me about it, I won't hesitate to clear it out. Otherwise, let the rumours spread.

[aaleena]

Spread even worse ones about her. I heard she breastfed her brother in a Walmart parking lot. I heard she had to use a cream on her lip every week because she grows a mustache. I heard she was in rehab for eating too much. Isn’t that sad. ...

To beat a bitch. You have to be a bitch

[Maguel]

Best comeback against her is to completely ignore her. She is getting exactly what she wants if you start getting nervous over something she tells thats not even true

[carbonnet]

I'm definitely I the same boat I worry sometime that someone might actually believe them it's quite sick what they were doing today with pictures of my daughter I wish I could locate them

[Asker]

That’s messed up

[andreasderjuengere]

Someone had tried that with me. I did nothing. Not long, and everyone knew that it was all lies. The man later lost his credibility, his business and his life as well. It wasn't me. But I thought it was fair.

[humor_me]

Same here! I would do absolutely nothing. Why would I waste my time or energy trying to 'correct' what some other @-hole created (and maliciously I might add).

Let the stones and slings fly. Eventually the dust will settle and karma will correct the situation.

[Asker]

Yeah you’re right 💗

[handyman129]

Just smile and live life happy. Its impossible to control what others say. But it is possible to look forward. Stay happy. And focus on the good things in life

[Paris13]

Explain your Pain if Anyone Asks you Here, dear. Nothing much you Can do for Now Somehow, But eventually Other Rumors Will Surface Where you Will be Put on a Back Burner. xx

[Paris13]

Just think of Poor Donald Trump who has to Face All of the Fake News. xx

[Asker]

It really hurts

[Kenni]

You be the bigger person and let them talk. There's nothing else to do. The right people will support you.

[ZELLxoxo]

Stay silent. Those who know u will never believe such things..

[sbnalenon]

Positive people always listen to their hearts, they barely can be influenced and things happens for good so dammn care and live your life happily 😊

[Asker]

Lol ok

[sbnalenon]

What's funny lol

[jirwin7979]

just ignore her and dont let her get to you people that are bullies or spread fake rumours are insecure about something in there life... hugs

[OnlyYouKnowThat]

Confront the person directly, in front of other people if necessary, and call them out on it.

[oldoldold]

Sadly the answer is to not care. Nice people will not pay attention to her. Bad people will never care for long.

[Asker]

Will the boy I like what if he believes what she says

[oldoldold]

Then he's a terrible person for not taking the time to learn how nice you are

[Asker]

But if he hears the rumours before getting to know me

[oldoldold]

Even then. A strong good man will make up his own mind.

[Asker]

Yeah true

[oldoldold]

You are lovely and should focus on those that know that and want to spend time with you. Better to have a few true friends than many acquaintances

[Asker]

Yeah true again

[oldoldold]

Sweet dreams pretty girl

[Anonymous]

Don't worry, the guy you like sees you just as an easy fuck buddy, won't matter what she is spreading about you.

[Asker]

Lol cool you must know so much

[Opinion Owner]

Its evident from your questions and posts, anyone who reads them one time will be able to tell you this

[Asker]

That’s nice Im talking about a different guy and the other guy we aren’t fuck buddies

[Rangers]

I'd take them outside and warn them that they'll be squealing like a rat if they don't shut their mouth.

[Anonymous]

I don't care if they wanna talk about me they can lol. They are just showing I'm on a higher level than them

[WildNekoWolf]

Confront her and rip out her hair. (Don't actually do that). I would say confront her and tell her to stop spreading rumors. If you have to, slap her.

[TheAceholeSupreme666]

Knock the bitch out, and knock out a few teeth while your at it. That will shut her up.

[_hottchocolatee]

I’d do nothing. If they’re a close friend of mine, I may ask them why they’re saying those things.

[BonnieBunny]

Nobody cares about me enough to do that, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[jimmy2]

Just explain the girl a bitch and dont worry what she says

[Knowmebetter]

Ignore it and remain you

[QueenofCups]

Tell the guy the truth.

[adolescentswede]

Shrug and continue day dreamming

[danielmeegan]

Ignore the swine they have nothing better to do

[TsubasaCorrupted]

Is it a sexual rumor?

[On_the_other_hand]

What did she say?

[Gottabsavagee]

Nothing you say gj

[jacquesvol]

Ignore her or him

[Kelly6]

Nothing

[SUMAIREBRAHIM]

Tall to her

[Sabretooth]

pray

[AlbanianYoungLady]

Confront them