My friends basically disowned me for being 37 dating a 21 year old, how should I go about this?

[Anonymous]

Basically, I met this 21 year old women about a month ago and we started seeing eachother. My "friends" had questioned it a few times, talking against me about it, saying that she was very young, etc. When I revealed that we were about to become serious, they essentially stopped talking to or messaging me except for one. I'm going to try to work passed this and find folks that would support me instead. I don't understand why they would do this. I need a little support and comfort in these rough times.

[anon171999]

Because most age gaps like that are from a pedophilic nature and your friends are assuming that that is the case with you. It's not always the case. I'm 22. My partner is 48. So I get it. But most of the time that age gap is because of pedophilia.
I don't know you. I don't know if that's the case with you. Nor do I need to know. You know and that's all that matters. So if you know that you struggle with that, then your friends were in the right and it's up to you to find a way to work through whatever pain you're dealing with. If you know that that is not something you struggle with and that the relationship is healthy and loving for both of you, then let those friends go and be grateful that you were able to learn that they don't trust you and your character.

[Asker]

21 is not pedophilia. It is a fully grown adult that is fully capable of making sound decisions

[anon171999]

Not a lot of the time, no it's not. Sometimes yes. But a lot of the time it's not.

[anon171999]

Physically 21 is grown, but not usually emotionally. Especially not in comparison to late 30s+. 21 is still growing into themselves and discovering their personality and who they are.

[SueShe]

Those people that stopped talking to you just because of an age difference are not real friends but merely buddies or acquaintances.

A true friend is not going to relinquish a friendship over a relation unless those "friends" do have serious motives to unfriend you. Perhaps that those friends are simply jealous or don't like to see you slip away from their circle of friends.

You are much better off without those superficial people. Those are not the type of people you want to be around anyway because if they leave you because you found someone, imagine how quickly they will run away if you are in serious trouble.

Let them go and concentrate on those that stick with you in all situations of life.

[horatiohornblower]

Sounds like you won all around. You got a girl you liked and got rid of horrible friends in one fell swoop. Just replace 21 year old girl with one the same age as you but a different race than you. Would you consider their actions at all acceptable or want to be friends with them anymore? If their harsh judgement was about race instead of age.

[mark000h]

Because your "friends" are either stupid, jealous or both. Absolutely nothing wrong with dating an adult. If I could get a 20-something gal, I definitely would. Screw em, enjoy and good luck.

[Leonharted]

I mean, she is really young for you. Have you stopped to actually listen to your friends' concerns?

[exitseven]

This really sucks. They were not very good friends.

[bean2k21]

enjoy that sweet girl like there's no tomorrow

[Asker]

Trying to make the best of it. We get weird looks in public and from both our family members as well. Man, if I tell someone I have someone that I have a girl and they ask me old how she is and I tell them, they give strange looks

[bean2k21]

I mean, it's like when you smell a deady body. People hate what they are the most.