I think it’s ridiculous how single moms think they’re high value and have high standards. Especially those who were never married and have children with more than one guy. Anytime a guy marries a single mom, it’s because he’s desperate, lonely, and had no other options. That’s the honest brutal truth.
No man wants another man’s lifetime responsibility. You’re really not winning dating someone’s mom, regardless of how hot she is. Single moms are just looking for a dad. Single women are just looking for love!
Women with kids
Women without kids
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Who’s more desirable? Women with kids or women without kids?
It depends on the person, some people prefer women with kids, some prefer without. Same goes for women, some prefer a man with kids, and some prefer without. For those of you who see a women or man with kids as having baggage, that might be true but everyone has some form of baggage like emotional issues or trauma, financial issues, mental health problems, some form of disability or heal issue. No one is forcing you to be with someone, if you can't handle the "baggage" someone comes with then just move along and get on with your day. In a serious relationship with someone you really like you need to be able to accept them for who they are baggage and all and they need to be able to accept you because no one is perfect. If you don't want to date women with kids or any other baggage then don't that's your choice and you're entitled to it but at the same time other people have the same choice not to date you. Shaming people with baggage is pointless, it achieves nothing and you're just hurting people who may not deserve the ridicule.
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Yes everyone has different baggage that some accept and others can’t. But certain types of baggage devalues people in the dating world.
For example, I’m in special Ed classes. I fully understand that I’m undesirable to most females. No female wants an illiterate man. It sucks but I had to accept the reality.
Single moms have little value in the dating world. And they need to accept it and live with it!
Wow you clearly hate single moms. Were you not good enough for one?
Why are single moms 'the problem' and not deadbeat dads?
You ask some single moms why did you end your marriage, and your answers range from 'cheating, abuse, gambling, substance abuse etc.' Sure there are the no fault paper divorces but are you really lumping all divorcees in the same category like that?
No parent, male or female, should be expected to live in an unsafe environment. No parent should be forced to stay in a marriage where their partner is perpetually cheating on them.
Single moms and dads Are desirable for those who are interested in having or raising a family. It's not 'extra baggage', it's bonus joy around the holidays, extra birthdays, bed time stories, and watching someone else experience 'the firsts' in life.
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I don’t hate single moms. I just can’t handle a relationship with one. And yes deadbeats dad are pieces of shit. Which is the exact the reason I don’t wanna raise their offspring. You just gave me another valid reason not to date a single mom. Thank you🙂
The question and argument of the OP could be presented better, but I understand.
In general a blended solution is the better option - two single parents coming together to raise their children. Or, two single and untethered individuals couple. I believe that the reality is that the option of single men without children will always be an option to some women. It’s obviously not your choice and I agree that it’s not the choice of most serious men with other viable options.
The point to women for men (in a general sense) is that both parties settle and that men believe in a value proposition. In a worse case scenario it’s expected for a man to provide. From an evolutionary point he wants to know that the emotional, genetic and financial legacy he leaves behind goes to his heirs and not another man’s progeny. This is why may people (both) men and women have wills and policies protecting their finances for their heirs.
My Ash If he was truly that popular then you would have just named him. Unfortunately sounds like he was forced to settle for whatever he could get after his car accident.
Double standards again. You shame young and single women as undesirable for wanting a childfree marriage too. You call us "non feminine" for never wanting kids. Now you're shaming single moms. Shouldn't you be more attracted to them because they have maternal instincts? You are against abortions, but will f**k other women like dogs, then accidents happen, you all blame women and start controlling their body. Most of you are just sadistic monsters.
If a woman without kids is more desirable then I must be the happiest person because I never want to have kids with anyone but be married in peace. But then you'll start new protests against this too. You'll call us "weak genetic material, incapable and useless for having a female genitalia".
Without kids in my opinion. I wouldn’t want to date a woman who has to worry about who’s going to babysit her kids while we’re out, or wants me to be apart of her kids lives. I don’t want kids myself so I sure don’t want to help raise a partners kids, especially if they’re young. If they’re teens then not so bad.
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Exactly!!! It’s not a fair deal. What you mention is just bit of what you’d put up with marrying single parents, and raising someone else’s children.
I’m pregnant right now and married but if I hypothetically one day am single I don’t think having a child changes my value as a woman or person. However, I def understand a man being more hesitant getting serious with a single mom because you will also be coming into a child’s life and that can effect them if there is a breakup. That’s a lot of pressure and why I believe you should not have children meet your dates until you know and date the person for a while and are serious.
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Your case is different. You’re married before the baby is born. An “ex-husband” is different than a “baby-daddy”.
If you end up single in the future you should date single dads. Because in that case you’d hold a high value to a single dad.
I can get guys not wanting an 18 year-old who's got a kid thanks to unprotected sex in a parking lot with a stranger. But for older women who've perhaps been married you have to accept a little baggage. You don't buy an old car and expect a unused clean boot.
That's why most guys dont buy "old cars" It's much easier for an older man to find a younger woman than vice versa. One of the benefits of being a man is that you actually dont have to accept a woman w/ baggage.
According to statistics men in their 30s-40s cheat way more than women and men at this age are usually married and so no wonder why there are divorced single mums. I also dont understand the hate towards single mums. Not even rapists, abuser get the same amount of hate that single mums get on gag lol
Then it depends on the age. You can't find any childless women in your 40s except you want to date people who could be your kids which is disgusting since the maturity level ain't the same due to brain development and the divorce rate is high for people with big age gap. I also can understand when single childless (young) men want childless women.
That's because that is the mans prime and women decline. You should see that women are cheating more in their twenties with this category of men. Women cheat more then men for they always tend to be in relationships, while men who intend to fuck around doesn't bother with one.
I agree but cheating when married is worse in my opinion since he became the dad of your kids and so you are connected with him. You are also way more mature at 40 than in your early 20s. 20 years people are not even allowed to drink aka are seen as teenagers but a grown ass man in his 40s should know it better. None of this justify cheating of course but it makes kinda sense when young people cheat due to immaturity and stupidity. Their brain development continue till in their mid 20s and therefore they tend to have unstable personality and are way and way more immature than a grown ass man in his 40s
Well it's bad to go for married men, because what you at best can catch is a cheater. You also are a part of the problem that actually enables them to cheat.
I am not part of the problem. Wtf. I said nothing justify cheating. I just daid that there is huge difference between an 40 years old and 20 years old whose Brain-development ain't finished that has a huge impact on PERSONALITY and MATURITY. I expect from 40 years old people to be more immature than a 20 years old with unstable personality and immaturity due to not finished brain development. Scientificically it "makes more sense" for 20 years old people to cheat than 40 years old people. Of course nothing justify cheating but we can't ignore the maturity and unstable personality of a 20 years old
I just said that there is a huge difference between an 40 years old person and 20 years old person ***
I expect from 40 years old people to be more mature than a 20 years old person with unstable personality and immaturity due to not finished brain development.***
***Of course nothing justifies cheating but we can't ignore the maturity level and unstable personality of a 20 years old person
Single moms absolutely are allowed to have standards, but so are their potential partners which is why they are less desirable. For one how would a good single mother even have the time for a man? Or better question is why would any man choose a woman that can only give half her time?
No mom needs to be with their kids 24-7. For example, when kids are in school, that’s 30-40 hours a week she’s not physically with them. That’s plenty of time to do with whatever she pleases.
Agreed, however from the opposite POV what I hear is that "when they have time". That 30-40 hours a week coincides w/ the time a man should be working on his career and goals, and life missions, so that's not going to fit at least for any successful man. The problem w/ women in general and single moms specifically is this belief that they will just pick a man and any man is going to stop what they're doing for them. Not only is that unrealistic but it's hypocritical considering they would be unable to do the same thing. I've been w/ both single moms and women w/o children and the reality is it is wayyyyyyyyyyy easier to spend time w/ women w/o children which is all that is important to me, or any other successful man. Now there are plenty of men out there w/ no options that will accept anything and in my opinion those are the ones single moms have to target.
If a man cares about a particular woman enough, he’ll make it work. My stepdad did. I’m assuming you just weren’t interested in these women enough otherwise even outside of the time constraints so it likely wasn’t going to work out for the long term anyway.
That's just something that women have been trained to say to justify their actions. Your assumption is just that, but in reality no man is going to invest valuable time into a women that can't do the same. I'll fuk u but there's no reason for me to invest any more than that. The most likely reason why your stepdad did that is because he was unable to attract other women so he was forced to settle. There are a lot of guys like that.
No he was a very popular musician. He had a crush on my mom since high school. He loved her. Then, and he was in a car accident that made him unable to have children of his own. My sisters and I are his children.
Why are the questions that are always looked down upon by women, why? What are you want with women? Can we consider this for a man? Because although most men are widowed and have children, they always want single women, and these single women willingly and lovingly mother the children of widows and do not separate them from their own children. (Okay some women may not be one, but that's a very small part.)
Unless the father is dead or in prison, it’s largely the mom’s fault why she’s single with young kids in the first place, so why should that type of family-destroying behavior be condoned by dating them? She’ll end up resenting you, and so will the kids because “you’re not their dad”.
I like how single moms try to bring women who were abused or were abandoned or widows into the same pot when they are not the same lmao.
But yeah, without kids is way better.
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Lol that is so true! It’s not the same thing. People who were abuse, abandoned, or widowed beyond their control. Single moms had full control of getting pregnant or not!
I’ve been seeing this discussion more and more lately and it seems that because a woman doesn’t have children. She’s more carefree and less serious about being in a committed relationship, but also the opposite effect because she doesn’t feel comfortable with having certain people around her child so she’s only looking for a one night stand as well so it’s kinda hard to tell
As for myself, I don’t have children so I want a real relationship, but not really taking seriously
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