Girl complaining/venting to a guy friend means he's in the Friend Zone absolutely 100%?

[Anonymous]

Are there any exclusions to the old rule of how if a girl is complaining to a guy about her problems, that he is totally only in the friend zone?

Does it matter what kind of problems she complains about?

Is it an absolute rule? What I mean is, if there are existing Indicators of Interest, yet the girl complains from time to time, does it cancel out these Indicators of Interest, therefore it puts the guy into the friend zone?

Girls, please help me with some answers from your thoughts. Thank you.

Updates

+1 y

To reiterate, do girls ever complain and/or say they're depressed etc to a guy that she is interested in ROMANTICALLY?

Updates

+1 y

What should my next course of action be?

[purpleprincess]

Yes- she would if she felt she had a strong bond with you, that you understand her as a partner would and is seeking your support. If she is doing this and showing clear signs of attraction she is telling you because she cares about you a lot, she is sharing her intimate/private thoughts with you as a means of letting you know this- probably to re-assure you that her mood swings are not as a result of anything you have done to upset her. You're not at the top of her male friends list, and you never have been, you are someone she is being friends with in pursuit of a romantic relationship and she's probably thinking by sharing this with you, you'll get the hint how much she cares for you. But I could be wrong! x

[purpleprincess]

Also it is worth remembering, that if a guy doesn't take the bait as far as reciprocating the womans attraction she will assume she has been friend zoned by you, and will accept this if she cares deeply enough for you-it is better than nothing!

[Asker]

Hi PurplePrincess. Thanks for your insight. The line between friendship/romance is so obscure and blurry. I wish there was a better way to find out by looking at the situation. Would the type of complaints, how she talks, how often, etc. give more hunts?

[purpleprincess]

I'd say the more frequent the more likely it is a friend thing, like if it's every day, your a friend, if it's randon one offs occasionally, she'ss saying, it's nothing you've done and she feels a bond with youu. But in all honesty, I suck at figuring guys and women out, so take with a pinch of salt.

[steveguitar]

@purpleprincess Thanks for this answer, I know this question has been closed for a long time. The only bad thing I can say is that I understand cats better than human girls/women

[Anonymous]

Yes, I do. I vent about my problems to seek help. Even to the guys I like who are my friends. It doesn't mean your stuck in the friend zone. it means they look up to your opion enough to get your thought about something. Sometimes I purposly go first to my guy friend who I like to see how much he really cares.

[Asker]

Thank you for your answer!

[islands7]

Complaints = friend zone or married/long term relationship

Course of action to be Boyfriend =

1. agree with complaints & leap frog each other until one reaches absurdity

2. don't guess ... KNOW what will cheer up her depressions, act immediately

3. confide in her what your perfect Girlfriend would be (make sure she can fit the picture physically, et al.)

4. think always - she comes first, even before me

5. be patient

6. be prepared for disappointment & to begin shopping for a new Girlfriend someday

[Belgie]

It's interesting to read PurplePrincess's response there... I would have said 100% certain, to be honest.

If a girl is complaining to you (a guy) about her problems with another guy, then you're essentially a surrogate girl. You have been friend zoned.

But maybe there's a useful distinction there. Maybe if she's telling you about her problems and they are not problems about another guy... maybe that's a sign that she has a bond with you, as PuplePrincess suggests.

[Asker]

There has been good indicators of interest from the girl. The type of things she says and how she says them online... But then she complained about her boyfriend about once or thrice to me. For her to give off all the signals then to complain about her boyfriend was somewhat devastating, since I know they are strong signs of friend-zoning.

[purpleprincess]

Thank you Belgie, I agree, yes their would be avoidence of discussing another guy, I'd say most likely venting about other issues such as work, friends, kids if she's got any, the knid of stuff you'd moan at your boyfriend/husband about, she's practically in a relationship with you already if she's doing this. You just gotta step it up, next time give her a hug and lean in for a kiss, see how she responds. Then if you get a kiss suggest you take her out. Hope this helps

[BoobMan]

Ask her out on a date one-on-one, flirt with her during said date, initiate physical contact and then try to kiss her on the lips. Her reaction will tell you whether or not you're in the Friendzone.

[BoobMan]

^^^^ there's your next course of action.