Do you have an absentee parent?

[User2324]

i never had a father & honestly don’t plan on it either. now that i’m older and can understand things for myself.. it makes me angry because he’s not dead, in jail, on drugs, in a mental institution or anything else! he just has no excuse at all! it’s so unfair. he went to have kids with someone else, left my mother & i behind then pretends to be father of the year to the others but apparently i don’t exist? it makes no sense and it does hurt but whatever. how can a “man” do this kind of thing with no care in the world? has anyone else had this experience? did you ever get over it?

[unknownforever]

Somewhat yes. Firstly, I am so sorry you went through this. I know it can be really tough. It makes you have so many questions and feel abandoned. But just so you know, it wasn't your fault, and that you deserve a life that is so amazing. For me, my mum is heavy on drugs. I haven't seen her in almost three years. She was negligent when I w3as living with her. I know she loves me, but she is letting her life slip away. And it has impacted her being in my life. With my dad, he is in it, but rarely around. He doesn't live with me, and I see him every 3-5 months, for about 2-4 weeks. So I don't really have anyone. It's tough. I know it's not exactly the same as having an absentee parent/s, but it does suck. But I hope it doesn't impact too much of your life. You deserve the world.

[User2324]

thank you for that & im sorry you experienced that as well. i try not to let it bother me too much but i feel like the hole it left is gonna impact me in some ways like.. how i am with relationships (especially men). i feel like it has messed with my confidence somewhat along with other things but one day i hope to just be completely over it & love myself and my life no matter what!

[SlothySlob]

In my case, I've met my dad 2 or 3 times in my life. My mom on the other hand... from my teens I'd visit her only on the weekends.

In my mind, both your mother and dad are to blame for your family dynamic. Neither practiced safe sex, both knew the consequences of having "raw" sex.

[TenkRealist]

I'm so sorry. This is men's form of abortion. Leaving their child since. You shouldn't have to go through that at all. Anyone who leaves their child is trash.

[User2324]

complete trash.. some days are better than others though.

[TenkRealist]

Yeah I can understand. I believe that ideally, every child should have a father and a mother and should grow up in a household like that. At least if you decide to have children, marry someone who actually wants kids and marriage and someone you know will step up.

[Anonymous]

Mostly, yeah. My mother was around until I was 9, but she cheated on my my dad and they got divorced. Thankfully my dad got custody of me and my sister. I still see her some but she is not a significant part of our lives.

[User2324]

do you think there are different effects from no mother vs no father?

[Opinion Owner]

Yes I do. I think mothers and fathers love differently and teach different lessons.