Is it clear to you when you get upset with a person, whether you are angry with them ABOUT something concrete, vs something about THEM makes you mad?

[VIVANT]

If you did know, would you be honest and tell someone they just annoy you if they asked you or would you pretend there’s an actual problem?

I see people get unhinged with otters and I think like, WHY?

if you’re mad say the problem so you can spice it, and if there’s no problem and that person just annoys you, you don’t HAVE to talk to them. Same as if you are having a bad day. Just keep it moving. 🤷🏻‍♀️

Too much fear/ avoidance of calm confrontation leads to unnecessary emotional explosion, in my opinion

Yes

No

I don't know/ sometimes

Other

Can he both 🤷🏻‍♀️

Updates

+1 y

😂 others not otters. 🧐 Who the heck gets mad at otters 🦦 🦦 🦦 so clever & cute!!!

SOLVE the problem not spice it.

Typo correction complete ☝🏼 🤝🤝🤝

[NathanDavis]

hmm, yes... usually I do tell people what do I have a problem with, and it is usually with something they're doing so I let them know that... is not you, it's what you're doing, lol

now, when people are annoying to me, I let them know that as well, but only if needed, I usually just keep my distance from them and that's a very easy solution BUT, if we have to get close or interact, engage... then it will be me the one to try and not to get riled up just because they're annoying to me

and then, there's a third thing... and that's about me and when I know I am moody "for no reason" just one of those days, and when that happens... I kind of let people know about it, I'm a bit moody today, just so you know... lol, fair warning

[VIVANT]

Yup you covered the three things, and it’s good you can communicate or keep calm & have self awareness. I wish this stuff was givenire importance in education than just dining prophecy to one up yourself. It’s super annoying people just holding grudges and getting mad like it’s some kind of conviction lol

in my opinion we should relate to every person as if they may be to our right in the middle of a hurricane. You never know who you may have to work with. You don’t need to be friends with everyone but it doesn’t help anyone to make enemies pointlessly.

[NathanDavis]

yes, that is very true...

and I think I actually learned over time, and while working with family and friends as well... lol

working with them can cause friction, and being familiar with them and having that familiarity can make it easier for things to escalate beyond the regular dynamics of work, so... I just learned how to deal with these kind of things over time, pretty much since I was a child as well

I just did not want to be so "high tension" like everyone else around me, in the family... lol

[Sevenpointfive]

otters smell but that's their thing. can't get mad at them for that.

but i do recognize quickly that i am mad or upset with someone. i do give them a chance to not piss me off but it usually exacerbates the problem so i don't do that anymore. i'd rather just talk it out

[Blackcosmo]

I usually ignore and avoid them. It is usually clear something's wrong since I won't talk to them but sometimes I'll just glare.

[VIVANT]

But they won’t know what the problem is — even if they pick up that you are angry

[Blackcosmo]

True but I'm too annoyed to talk about it.

[VIVANT]

Fair enough 🤔

[VIVANT]

Prob best in that case 😊

[WowwGirl]

I prefer confrontation then avoiding. I'd say something

[VIVANT]

Same same 😌😊

[WowwGirl]

Beautiful

[AmeerX]

I like upfront people tell me to my face they don't want anything to do with me with a simple I am not interested or I don't like you etc. Then just disappearing without telling me about the problem.

P. S. don't make a stupid excuse though

[VIVANT]

Agreed 👍🏼

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I don't get mad or annoyed with people but it does make me wonder about things I like to call myself a guy who likes to remain the peacemaker and not start up an argument

[VIVANT]

I can see tuat about you, very nice 😊

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

@VIVANT Thank You :-D

[humanearth]

depends on the person

Wife and kids I'm clear on why I'm pissed off

Strangers well that depends how well I can read them. (I'm too old to be getting into fist fights)

[VIVANT]

Sure thing, hard with strangers pretty awkward and prob not worth the salt 😌

[ChiTown33]

That's hard to answer because some people say they want clear communication, but then don't respond well to criticism.

So I TRY to be honest always. But some times you have to weigh honesty vs. The perceived overall response. Sometimes you have to give some people the truth in installments if you get what I mean.

Yes I want honesty but not at cost unnecessary discord.

[Anonymous]

uh huh. I'm practicing not saying anything to the person until I've had time to think and figure out what the actual thing is that I'm mad about.

[VIVANT]

I like that 👍🏼 deal with it but he thoughtful.

[Philyouup]

I am angry with my brother, and he knows as I am sure he is angry with me. The stress of taking care of my mother combined with two adult brothers trying to live together is very frustrating and stressing. I wish we wereI am angry with my brother, and he knows as I am sure he is angry with me. The stress of taking care of my mother combined with two adult brothers trying to live together is very frustrating and stressing. I wish we weren’t angry not angry

[Chazmatazz269]

I have no problem telling people their defects from my perspective.

[Guardian45]

I'm neurodivergent. I process emotions slowly and sometimes don't understand my emotional response right away. I have to go away and think about it before I understand my reaction.

[Jamie05rhs]

"Too much fear/ avoidance of calm confrontation leads to unnecessary emotional explosion, in my opinion."
Agreed 100%.

[Aakash_Hangargi]

Yo words donot match your actions young grass hopper lol 😆😹

[MysticDevice]

I tend to clarify after I've finished my ranting

[maximumpower]

What?