My parents have never said I love you?

[Anonymous]

My mam and dad have never said I love you to me, my sister or even eachother.

Do they not say it because im too unlovable or what

I always thought it was normal until I heard my friends parents telling them they loved them

[SnowedIn]

I am SO sorry to hear this. I believe that our children need to hear this.

I understand: my parents never told me they loved me. My dad's dad died when he was 3 and his mom was a very stern, very strict woman. I'm not sure the word "love" was ever uttered in his house. My mom's parents were more affectionate, but for whatever reason she became cold. Never said "I love you". So, yeah, I hear where you're coming from.

...but...

This is in no way because you're unlovable or anything related to that. You are loveable. You are wanted by the world even if it seems otherwise. Your parents too, most likely, and they're not great at saying it or showing it. Why do I think that? You said they don't say "I love you" to each other. That tells me that it's not a you thing or a your sister thing. They're just not verbal about expressing their love. Doesn't make it easier on you, but I really believe it isn't personal.

One thought might be to ask them sometime in a non-judgmental way. You can say something like, "Hey, in a movie the characters in a family often say 'I love you'. I realize I don't hear you say that. How come?" Or something less cringey but you get the idea. It might make your parents think.

[Malgaran]

It's not you. I never heard it growing up either, heard it more in my adult years though. But I have a bit of a messed up relationship with my mother, or was anyway, she kinda hated me and kinda tried to kill me too but anyway. My father I just dont think it crossed his mind cause he wasn't expressive that way.

Some people just don't say or express these things, but they can learn. I too was shocked when I met more normal families, it really made my own stand out, how abnormal mine was. If you need to, you can always ask them, if they love you. If you love them, could always start saying it yourself, maybe break the ice that way, help it become normal. Cause some people who don't say these things could have never been told they are loved either. Maybe you all need to hear it

[WonderBell99]

That might just not be their way of expressing their affection. My parents never really tell me that they love me either, but growing up, they showed that in more ways than one. I can empathize with how you feel, but think about this: Would you rather have a parent that is all tell no show (ie tells you that they love you, but their actions indicate otherwise. they lie to you, manipulate you, hit you etc.) or a parent that does not say "I love you" often but shows it through their actions and behavior?

If you really want them to say those words, you could just ask them if they love you... or you could start saying "i love you" first!

[Sunflower19]

People have different ways of showing love. Maybe your parents were never told "I love you" when they were growing up... so they feel that it is normal. Be the change and break the cycle. Start saying it in your family and watch. 💛

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Sorry, you are facing this my parents weren't too loveable parents, but we managed

[Anonymous]

It's they show you they love, not just say it.

I dont have to do a thing, and dad will still love me. I am a loser still living with my mom and dad, and they still love me, or they would kick me out.

[Sensmind]

I suppose it depends on the household you grew up in , some say it others don't and most of the people who didn't say it did not feel any less love than in the house that said "I love You"

[exitseven]

My parents never said it to me either. I never heard them say it to each other either. As a result it was really hard for me to say it to my girlfriend.

[Anonymous]

I love you... ❤️

[Asker]

Thank you, you don't know how much I needed that

[Opinion Owner]

Aw come here..

Hugs ❤️