Is it okay to avoid some family members that are toxic and not the right one's for you?

[DenizLikesTennis]

As much as it sucks, yes it is

No, feel empathy

[Guy13]

Because one avoids the negative in one's life and removes those people does not mean one lacks empathy. At some point, we have to look after ourselves and our own well-being. I do the same but I still feel for their situation, however, I can not be around him continually rehashing and hearing the same negative crap over and over again.

Distance can be a good thing.

[DenizLikesTennis]

Agreed, actually... I am highly intuitive person... INTJ... and what i felt was... I didn't really feel like visiting them... guess that was a small punishment for me

[Guy13]

Yeah, like that point of view. Small sacrifice for the growing of self UNTIL one just can't take it anymore.

[DenizLikesTennis]

The id, the ego, the superego (I am saying this to make sure I learnt something new)

[Guy13]

Yeah I recognized those Freudian components but will have to refresh on each function.

[ShiftingMonke]

Absolutely. They are family, but they're humans first. And if someone in your life isn't good for you, they need to go. You win no awards for needlessly suffering over semantics; your life is just harder. It's not worth it. Seek happiness by any means neccesary.

[DenizLikesTennis]

You are right. My well-being and health comes first!

[ShiftingMonke]

That's the spirit!

[douride2]

I am going with yes on this subject.

[douride2]

Thanks for a MHO.

[Moose304]

One of my sisters and two cousins I have basically disowned. I have not had any contact with my sister since my mother died over 10 years ago. I also don't allow them to live in my head either. I made peace with the fact I only have one sister now and give the other sister little or no thought.

[DenizLikesTennis]

My condolescents, dear! You have went through a huge and difficult phase. Hope you are doing better now

[Moose304]

Back in the early 80s I was going to school at Georgia Tech. I was also working several jobs. There were times when I had to make a choice to fill the tank of my VW bug so I could drive to work or eat. I was existing on one meal a day and trying to go to school and work. I asked this sister for some help and she told me to stop wasting my money. I never asked her again. I also got through those dark days. Then later this same sister asked me to help her out. That was the day I reminded her of what she had done to me. I never gave her a dime. It's not like I was asking for hundreds of dollars. I was asking for a twenty. When my sister asked me for money she asked for OVER a thousand bucks. Oh, I had enough to give her some. I still said no simply based on a principle.