As a Christain, is it a bad thing if the wife doesn't want children?

[Anonymous]

I feel as if I am not desirable enough to marry due to the fact I don't wish to have children (biological, adopted or foster).

I do have valid reasons for this. I don't hate children or anything. If anything, I love children but I have additional reasons as to why I don't wish to have any of my own.

What are your thoughts?
No children turn off or turn on?

Updates

+1 y

Thank you all for your answers to my questions. I think I will just remain single/celibate.

[BarryLiverstone]

I would not want to marry someone who is wanting a childless life. However you asked if it’s a bad thing and my answer is no because many adults don’t have children. Unless did you mean something else in your question?

[Asker]

Thank you for your reply 😃
True. There are a few people who don't wish to have children, however, it's rather rare.

[BarryLiverstone]

You are welcome. Are you specifically wanting to marry a Christian person or why ask Christian’s their opinions?

[Asker]

I am looking to marry a Christian 😃
I am Christian myself.

[BarryLiverstone]

Ty for MHO. Glad you are happy being single and enjoying freedom

[Berethor]

God said "be fruitful and multiply", what the point of marrying if you don't want children?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cultural_mandate

[Asker]

I feel as if God/Yahweh will understand my reasons behind why I don't wish to have children.

[Berethor]

Even if he do, then you should become a nun, children are the future, and it's a fact.

[Asker]

I agree with you. Children are the future. However, I am sure there will be others to take my place. There are a lot of women in the world.

Please don't misunderstand me when I say that I am doing my possible future children a favour. I don't wish for them to suffer as I suffer.

[Berethor]

You doing your possible future children a favour? really it's can't be that bad, right?

[Asker]

I have a list of reasons why I shouldn’t have children. My main reason is I am mentally ill and I don’t want my child to suffer a mental illness (it runs in my family- OCD, BPD, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia-)

[KrakenAttackin]

Correct, she has no business wanting to be a wife of she doesn't want to be a mother. This tells me she only wants a man as a retirement plan.

[LazerBean]

Most men who meet your standards will not want to marry you for that reason. But if you meet a man who feels the same way about kids and end up marrying him, there's nothing wrong with that.

[CrimsonAngel09]

Turn off for me.

Evwryone is different, plus I'm sure there's plenty of people like you who don't want kids.

They're out there.

[Asker]

Thank you for your reply 😄
Yes, I hope so. It seems like everyone wants children of their own someday.

[joenelson]

Be it Christian or anyone else, I would say having a childless life would also be meaningless.

Especially with women, I feel conceiving a child is what it makes them completely different from men.

And every woman that I have been friends with have always wanted to have children of their own.

I can understand situation where someone is not able to conceive or if its a life threatening risk. In that case, we would at least plan for adoption.

I am sure you would have valid reasons for this decision.

I have a nephew at home who is now 5 years old, when I am completely stressed from work, I come home and talking to him gets my stress relieved instantly.

[Brittanyroseee]

I don’t want kids and im religious 🤷🏼‍♀️

[Brittanyroseee]

Never had the desire to have kids

[Brittanyroseee]

I honestly would probably see it as a chore and i would be miserable

[Brittanyroseee]

Is not wanting kids simply cuz I don’t want them not valid?

[Brittanyroseee]

There is more to life than kids lol.

[Brittanyroseee]

Not everyone wants kids

[Brittanyroseee]

I have different interests and priorities in life that do not involve a child

[Brittanyroseee]

Ah i see. After a long day of work i like to come home to solitude and no noise and kick back, smoke some ganja and watch a movie🤷🏼‍♀️

[Brittanyroseee]

Coming home to a child at least to me, is more stress and more work

[joenelson]

I hope you find all peace in your life being alone and self concerned. Or if you decide to be with someone, may you find someone who's aware about your wants and needs. Moreover, he or she may have same mindset.

And please for God's sake stop spamming other's opinions with your comments. Write the whole story in your own opinion.

Your own opinion was a one liner.

Have some respect of others opinion as well.

[Brittanyroseee]

I love being alone. It’s called solitude. Also, who said I didn’t want a relationship or life partner? I just don’t want kids🤷🏼‍♀️i can find someone who feels the same way. Not a big deal. What is wrong with being self concerned? At the end of the day, it is my own life.

[joenelson]

Good for you. It's your life, live the way you want. 🙂👍🏼

[KrakenAttackin]

You are absolutely not as desirable if you don't want children. In fact, why get married at all unless you just want a man as a retirement plan. Women who don't want children are missing a core part of femininity that makes them seriously unattractive.

[Asker]

Thank you for your reply.
And no, I don't want “a man as a retirement plan”. I want to love, care and serve my husband. I want his love, leadership and companionship.
I do understand that having children is a core part of womanhood. I don't hate children at all. I don't wish to have children due to a number of reasons. My main reason is mental illness. I am mentally ill, and my family has a long history of mental illness (i. e. OCD, borderline personality disorder, bipolar disorder, and schizophrenia). I do not wish for my child to suffer under these conditions or see them.

[Brittanyroseee]

I don’t like kids🤷🏼‍♀️i have no interest in raising or being around them.

[Brittanyroseee]

I honestly find babies and toddlers gross and annoying and very demanding and clingy. I also just have no paternal instinct and no desire to have them. I prefer a solitude life, making money and having a career over being stuck at home raising kids. Not my lifestyle. That’s how i feel and it will stay this way.

[Unit1]

You need not to justify yourself for not wanting children.

[Asker]

Thank you 🙏🏻

[Static_In_The_Attic]

To each is own & there is nothing that says you have to have children in the first place so it’s not a bad thing if the wife doesn’t want to have children however she should of talked about it with her husband before they got married.

[Anonymous]

It IS concerning. It's like a guy saying "I don't want to work". Would you want to be with a guy who said that.

[Asker]

I do have valid reasons as to why I don't wish to have children. I have a mental illness. I don't wish for my children to have a mental illness. Mental illnesses run in my family (i. e. OCD, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, BPD)

[Brittanyroseee]

I don’t like kids so why should i have them?

[shortster]

Yes, we are commanded to be fruitful and multiply.

[Brittanyroseee]

I hate kids lol

[shortster]

Why is that?

[Brittanyroseee]

Kidding. I just don’t necessarily care for them or like them.

[Brittanyroseee]

I don’t have much interest in raising any

[Brittanyroseee]

Plus they are very expensive and extremely time consuming. It’s a huge responsibility and commitment for 18 years. Changes your entire life.

[Brittanyroseee]

Id rather have pets. They don’t require so much work and money and they don’t restrict your time

[shortster]

I think that is the point of having kids.

[Brittanyroseee]

And? There is more to life than kids. Not everyone wants the same things in life.

[shortster]

Are you talking about grandkids?

[Brittanyroseee]

Everyone has different interests and priorities in life. I don’t want the responsibility of a child. I only want to be responsible for myself. Nothing wrong with that. A child is a huge investment in which you should WANT and DESIRE. I don’t want that lifestyle 🤷🏼‍♀️sorry

[Brittanyroseee]

What? I don’t want my own offspring. What are you not getting? I don’t want to have copies of myself

[Brittanyroseee]

Your not understanding what im saying.

[shortster]

I am a biologist. Offspring is the very essence of life.

[Brittanyroseee]

No its not. Kids are not needed. Not everyone wants fucking kids. Fuck off with that bullshit.

[Brittanyroseee]

I would abort my own “child” if i got pregnant bro. Im on birth control for a reason… what do you not get? Humans are unique individuals that have high intelligence and everyone has different interests in life. Humans can make the choice to not reproduce unlike animals which MUST reproduce for survival. Humans, can make that choice and not everyone has the desire to have kids. I don’t. Respect that.

[Brittanyroseee]

Women are not breeders. We are humans with different wants and interests in life. I have no fucking interest in being a house wife and raising children. None whatsoever. Sounds like a prison to me honestly and I don’t like kids either. Bye