Is it selfish to not want kids after getting married?

[Anonymous]

My fiancee and I really don't want kids, we just want to be able to travel and do what we want without that kind of responsibility, we have different plans in mind for our relationship.

[Anonymous]

Nothing wrong w that. It’s your life. You only have one. So what makes you two happy. I love traveling. I wish I had done that more when I was younger. I travel a lot now that’s for sure w my wife. But traveling is a lot of fun. Take advantage of it. Better to live for moments than little things like shoes or a new hat that will only keep you happy for a little while.

[Purpleronnie]

It’s just a choice , and good that you have made that choice together , neither selfish or selfless.


My lady and I aren’t married but we decided at the start of our relationship that we never wanted to parent a child.


Having a child is a lifelong commitment and set of responsibilities, a choice that should be made with a loving partner fully educated on what it will mean for both of you.

[PBandJ_Nerd]

No, it's not selfish at all. It's worse to have kids and they have a crappy life because they weren't wanted. Not having kids because you don't want them is completely valid. Parenthood isn't for everyone (it's a lifelong job & difficult).

[DishLady]

I’d you both agreed to marry and NOT have kids then no it’s not. But if you married someone who you KNOW wants to have kids then you’ve done a pretty shitty thing…

[AI Opinion]

As a relationship coach here to add some pizzazz 🌟 to your life, let me assure you: it's totally OK not to want kids after getting hitched! You and your fiancé have the freedom to choose what makes you both happy, like spontaneous travel adventures or cozy nights in. Not following the script doesn't make it selfish; it's just customizing life's playlist to your favorite tracks. And hey, who can blame you for wanting to keep love in first-class, right? 😉 Live your best life!

[SteveSmith1985]

Absolutely not. Selfish... at whose expense? It blows my mind that anybody could even see it this way.

Who is it you're being selfish towards/against/in-favor-of? Who is harmed by you and your wife's choice not to have kids.

I remember being about 22, and at the bar with some friends. My buddy Andrew who was a decade older turned to me and asked this exact question. I remember thinink it was such a strange way for anyone to feel. That there was something selfish about choosing not to procreate. I couldn't wrap my head around it.

After telling him, "no, I think that's nuts, why would you worry there's anything selfish about that"... I had to chalk it up to some sort of weird biological thing, that I could look forward to when I got around his age (thirty).

Nope. I've always wanted kids. Life didn't turn out that way.

I'm 40, and I still think its nuts to worry there might (somehow) be something selfish in the choice to not have children. It's not an age thing. It must just be different ways of thinking. I can't even understand how a person could possibly feel guilt over this. It doesn't compute for me.

You and your fiancée... you live the lives you prefer. If that doesn't include being parents. Nobody on earth should have a problem with that.

🙂

[Asker]

We'd prefer just to travel and kids would get in the way of that, plus she's has many siblings and was stuck looking after them growing up, she's tired of looking after kids. I also don't feel I want that major responsibility, I just want to travel with her and be a good partner/husband, not a father.

[SteveSmith1985]

hahaha, Dude! I don't think it's selfish. You just made a case to me... but you don't need to explain your reasons... to me.

The only thing you need to justify not having kids is: "I just don't want kids" that's ALL. hahah, you really do have some guilt here. You shouldn't. It's just the choice you made because that's what you want for your life. I hope you get to be ok with this. There's no need to see it as selfish. It's not. 🙂

[Finchie40]

Not at all , if you both had this discussion and both agreed upon it , then not selfish at all.

[MzAsh]

Nope I’m right there with ya 🥂

[DrPepper12]

Selfish? No!! Your lives, your call. FYI the most happiest people according to every international survey are gay couples because they have two disposable incomes and no kids a lot of the time. Have fun!! Nieces & nephews are GREAT substitutes.

[Entertained_Adult]

It's very bigoted to assume that gays cannot have kids. But don't worry, i jork to bigotry regularly.

[Blunky]

Not selfish at all. It's referred to as the DINK lifestyle (Dual Income No Kids) and is actually more common than you think. There's quite a lot of people who aren't interested in having kids nowadays.

[DianaPearce]

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[trumpetplayerforlife]

Not at all some people don't wnat to be parents and that okay nothing wrong with that it's your life

[Ladsin2]

Yes. Clearly. It's bad for society and you'll drain other people's children's resources when you retire. This is why social security is failing. You're doing it all so that you can have more amenities. I can't see anyway around it being a selfish decision. It is your decision though. I don't plan to watch and make sure you're not pulling out. I also think that it is less fulfilling and believe that y'all will change your minds in a few years. You're still young.

[IslaTheWitch]

no, if you said it openly before you got married... and your partner agreed...

[Vevv123]

As long as you both agree on it. Nothing is selfish about not wanting kids.

[Nikki1989]

No, not at all. We wanted kids at first, but soon changed our minds.

[TheSpaceGnome]

Yes, but be selfish. People telling you not to, dont have your best interests in mind.
You only get 1 life. Do what makes you happy.

[Lliam]

Selfish according to who? It's your life to live as you choose. That's the life my wife and I chose. We're glad we don't have kids.

Have fun!

[MoonFace2]

No, I think it’d be selfish to HAVE kids, knowing you didn’t want them.

[Anonymous]

It's your life so do what you want and have fun together

[LiamJHayden]

No. What is selfish is having children and expecting the taxpayers to support them.

[fish5505_87]

Cheers, enjoy the ride. There is no law about having kids. Keep us updated on your escapades.

[NicholasRedone]

I'd never want offspring or kids 😋😋😋😆🙃🫠🙂 yet I sure donate a lot and act hospitable, so I can't be evil 😈 completely

[Hаwk_Tuаh]

This question again? Does the homepage feature it twice daily?

[Anonymous]

Yes it is selfish you need to do your godly responsibilities and raise a productive member of society that will work and pay taxes so old people can retire. You need to be a grown up.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

No. It's selfish to have kids and not care to raise them properly.

[Jamie05rhs]

No; absolutely not. Live your life. Who cares what the nosy conservatives think?

[MikeTheBartender]

I have a vasectomy so I hope not!

[aycosko]

This is yours decision Everyone should be respect.

[Dreamclouds]

Its okay do what you feel is natural to yoy

[Dreamclouds]

Some geniuses didn't have any kids so i think you should be safe

[Anonymous]

No, I don't think so.

[seeyounexttuesday]

yes it is.