Other than abuse, what things in your honest opinion makes someone a 'bad' parent?

[Still-alive]

Just give your list of things that have to be in place for you to conclude 'yup thats a bad parent right there!' and i mean aside from abuse which is obvious.

[ohsheeT]

You don't have to yell at your kids. You don't have to hit your kids. With the parent has to understand is that child is an empty vessel from the moment that child was born he will look she will look at their parent and learn everything by their tone of voice the way they use their body the way they conduct themselves in every manner that's all they're going to know is what the parent shows them.

Through their daily lives their interactions with their friends their conversations on the phones and since that's all that child knows that's all that child is going to be not unless you put more time and more energy and communication into that child when you have a child you want that child to be better than you 100% better than you and in order to do that you have to put time and energy into that child in a positive manner

If you cannot do so you should not have that child if you make it all about you you should not have that child if you have to think your king s*** to discipline or take away from a child you're full you don't discipline you don't take away you give more responsibility. But you're going to have the parents out there that got hit they got yelled at they were treated like s*** so they think that's how they have to raise their child to I got news for you you're wrong you don't talk down to your kid you build your kid up when the kid does something wrong you use as little words as you possibly can to explain the situation and then you say do you understand okay great go have fun think before you do your kid thinks you're a God so teach your kid with respect and honor and trust and love and they will be exactly who you want them to be if you yell scream and I'll be above that's exactly who they're going to be

[Sweetsurprize]

Wrong. I never thought my parents were "Gods"! I knew they were HUMAN! But never thought of them like that no way! That would have been really awful to think of them like that.

Anyway, I'm late to answer this but in my view, abuse isn't always physical, it can be emotional too like neglect (physical and emotional), to put it in simpler terms. I also know that no parent is perfect and they shouldn't beat themselves up for that no way. I do know that parents are just human and they try their best with whatever resources they have to raise a responsible, matured, and capable (not to mention loving and caring) adult into society.

[Sweetsurprize]

And if they fail, well... look at the results in the news. From school shootings, to child/teen/young adult suicides, self-harming, bully victims, trauma, mental illnesses like being gay or homosexual, etc. It's very sad.

[JustinTheGreat]

I was just talking about this earlier. I hate when parents make their oldest children take care of the younger ones.

It’s not a teenagers job to raise your youngest child for you. A teen helping out here and there or babysitting once in a while is fine. But making it a teens job to care for YOUR kid constantly is fucked up.

I’ve even seen families with kids as young as 10 years old watching over toddlers by themselves. Let kids be kids and stop having children if you can’t take care of them yourself

[JustinTheGreat]

Random question, have you always been 40 years old? LMAOOO. I remember the age on your profile being younger. I swore you were younger than me

[Still-alive]

i just had a birthday July 29th :)

[JustinTheGreat]

Happy belated birthday!
I know we’ve been following each other for a while, I don't know why I thought you were younger. 😅 maybe I’m confusing you for someone else. Or it’s a Mandela effect 😳

[Sweetsurprize]

I didn't know parents did that. I guess it's because I was the youngest growing up. How sad.

[menina]

1 - Being too permissive: kids need limits, we can't let them do everything they want.

2 - Not telling them when they're wrong : that way they never learn from their mistakes.

3- Feeding the kids with unhealthy food.

4- Neglecting their feelings and needs.

5- Mocking them (but not in a good way).

6- Not making time to spend with their kids. Not making time to talk to them.

7 - Telling and showing them that it's ok to be a bigot.

8 - Not supporting their dreams.

9 - Not accepting them as they are.

10 - Not taking them seriously.

[menina]

I forgot to mention something obvious - not loving them.

[menina]

Thanks for the MHO.

[petitedollbabee]

Lack of discipline and boundaries. Letting your kid walk all over you, do whatever they want, talk to you however they want, without consequences - that makes you a bad parent. You’re turning your child into an awful adult who’s full of themself and acts entitled.

[Drewtate]

Neglect is a big one. There are many forms of neglect from not feeding, clothing or looking after a child properly or just relying on nannies, child care workers, babysitters and teachers to basically raise then for you. In 2023 a lot of parents just use the TV or tablet with their kid for 12 hours per day.

A lack of discipline and boundaries is another. I grew up with a few kids who had "cool" parents that allowed their kids to drink, smoke weed and have sex under their roof. An ex of mine her mother bought her a vibrator on her 13th birthday and put her on the pill. Let her throw parties etc. I used to sleep over a lot until my parents went crazy about it. Last I heard she was being put in a rehabilitation clinic, parents can't understand where they went wrong. Some of the stuff we were doing we shouldn't have been doing at such a young age, not even at college.

Another thing would be setting a bad example. Whether it be through say obesity or maybe immorality. Like stealing your mother's pension and home and putting her in an old folks home. What kind of lesson does that teach?

[BasedBaeBecca]

Here are some things that may make someone a bad parent, aside from abuse:

* Neglecting your children or not spending enough time with them.
* Being overly critical or overbearing towards your children.
* Forcing your beliefs and values onto your children.
* Treating your children unfairly or showing favoritism.
* Poor communication with your children.
* Lack of proper discipline or consequences for bad behavior.
* Failure to provide a safe and stable environment for your children.

[Sweetsurprize]

Damn, a lot of people here are matured for their age! You included.

[CloudScraper]

Probably countless possibilities here but at their core many answers might come from:

-Not loving their kid

-Not becoming emotionally healthy enough to model good coping and social skills.

-Trying to be right not listen and teach

-Not being there.

-Being selfish and trying to live a life through there kid, not helping their kid learn to live a great life.

But the reasons someone could fail are like the sands of the sea. Luckily kids are resilient especially when they know they are loved lol.

[Ninania]

In my case, emotional neglect. My emotions and experience were never validated. I was constantly criticised and told how to behave. I didn't know I had autism and adhd before adulthood, and my "symptoms" (for lack of better word) were all the things I was always told to correct or suppress.

[ProbablyClueless]

lack of discipline is pretty bad. I also don't like it when I see parents refusing to engage with their kid on things the kid is interested in. It doesn't matter how YOU feel about transformers. Your kid likes transformers. So just learn about the damn things.

[DarkLegacy]

Using their kid to make excuses for themselves or to make things easier, such as trying to get extra money off of the state or breaking the law, or taking up the disabled seat on the bus or disabled parking. Using their kid against the other parent.

A lot of women are guilty of the above.

[slatyb]

Everything that makes someone a bad parent is a form of abuse.

[Still-alive]

i mainly mean physical. other than physical what forms of 'mental abuse' makes someone a bad parent?

[Miah05]

Not supporting their child's dreams, if they are reasonable,

not taking interest in their child's education,

not helping to teach their child responsibility and morales,

[Sweetsurprize]

If I was asking this question, I'd pick your answer as MHO (one of them).

[DaisyM23]

just general neglect, abuse (i was hit for discipline as a kid but there's a difference between that and hitting for fun/anger), disrespect and spoiling them too much

[strateguy632]

depends which country some places crime. south korea and over 60 other countries forbade physical punishment. hit is not the only way to raise nor teach a kid.

[Sparkie460]

Being an alcoholic.

Doing drugs.

Always out partying and never home with your children.

Letting them have way too much freedom.

Not showing them any love.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Using shoes/ belts/ to spank kids is so wrong.

[strateguy632]

and even hands used spank, is crime in some states.

[Simslover92]

Neglect or does that fall under abuse?

[sheikalana]

Not caring for their kids.

[sirderpsalot123]

Not preparing their kids for the real world

[Sweetsurprize]

But what is 'real' though?

The 'real world' to rich and entitled blokes for one thing, is VASTLY different than the 'real world' for the poor and impoverished.

[Sweetsurprize]

Either way though, good answer.

[ShesRad80]

neglect.

[LazerBean]

Bad or no guidance.