How come my relative can phone anytime she wants but if I do it she will be rude towards me?

[Anonymous]

My cousin calls me a lot morning or night without notice but I did it once around 7pm and she said “some of us got work tomorrow!”

[rosemilk]

because she is self centered

[IslaTheWitch]

Do you say openly that you don't want her to call you at specific hours? Or do you expect her to guess?

[Asker]

I didn’t mind when she called me many times at first but when she got angry that ONE time when I decided to call when I wanted she got pissy

[IslaTheWitch]

so I don't understand. You said her nothing, because you don't mind, but when she minds and told you that you think it's rude? Why?

[Asker]

She no longer gets that opportunity to call at any time she wants now especially if she got pissy with one call

[IslaTheWitch]

lol... so you punished her for being open about her preferences

[Asker]

Just find it rude since I was being nice when she called at any hour she wanted and she gets pissy with literally one call at 7pm

[IslaTheWitch]

if you don't mind something it doesn't mean other people feel the same. Your cousin sees things differently than you and says it openly. Is it wrong?

[Asker]

She harasses people constantly and people have avoided her. Expects a lot from other but doesn’t do the same back for others

[IslaTheWitch]

set your boundaries

[Asker]

I have tried setting boundaries but she doesn’t take no for answer or guilt trips me to answer texts like she will send “are you ok?” And it was only 2 days that had gone by. What’s a 45 yr old texting 24/7 for and it’s usually about nothing

[IslaTheWitch]

set your boundaries and don't let her cross them. It's called being assertive. No one can do it for you. Or you are assertive or others will cross your boundaries

[Anonymous]

Have you asked her?

[Asker]

Just find it rude since I was being nice when she called at any hour she wanted and she gets pissy with literally one call at 7pm

[Opinion Owner]

That makes sense.