Why is my mom so negative anytime I go to the gym?

Question

Anytime I go to workout at the gym she’s always adding her 2 cents in and saying that I’m overdoing it and that’s it’s dangerous to go bus it to the gym in the evenings…. secondly she’s always trying to push food on me anytime I come home

why is she so negative about me going to the gym for? I go because it good to move around and to be in shape

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

It’s time for you to move on from your Mom and get your own place , it sounds like your Mom is jealous of you for whatever reason, is she a single Mom? If so, she is probably jealous of the attention and compliments you are receiving from people your Mom talks to or a daily basis , she is comparing herself to you. Sadly their are Mom’s that do this to their daughters when they are single , I dated a girl that had a single Mom and her Mom was jealous , every time her daughter had anything positive happen to her , like she rained on her parade no matter what , her Mom also hated that I was a good boyfriend to her daughter , she would get jealous of the things I did for her daughter , basically thinking why hasn’t she received that treatment from guys’ she dated , It was one of the strangest mother daughter relationships I have ever witnessed. Very weird to be honest. So again you are best to distance yourself from your Mom and focus on yourself , You don’t have to hate your Mom just don’t include her in everything you do , keep somewhat of a distance from her , and when she questions you as to why you are being distant , just say because you always criticize me when I do something

patois · Accepted Answer

It’s pretty typical for mothers to want to feed their children when they look tired. If you look exhausted after doing a lot of physical activity, moms are going to notice that and try to offer you some food to regain your strength. You’re a girl, so you take it the wrong way and think she’s jealous. Sons on the other hand tend to experience this our entire lives. You go out and play sports as a kid, and mom takes you out to get something to eat after a big game. You move a bunch of furniture for your mom, or do some back breaking lawn work, or fix something heavy like a washing machine or the kitchen sink and mom wants to make you lunch in appreciation for all your hard work. You change the oil in her car, maybe change her break pads, and swap out some air filters, and mom wants to buy you a pizza and maybe get you some cold beers after she sees you sweating and covered in dirty oil and break dust. This is pretty typical mom behavior. Moms try to take care of their kids. As she’s already voiced, she is concerned about you riding the bus at night. She care about you kid.

Booklover_90 · Accepted Answer

Does she care about her own health? Usually, people who  don’t  take care of themselves will do things like this. I only bring this up because my mom is similar. I’m not a part of a gym, but I do work out regularly and she has made similar comments to me in the past. Unfortunately, my mom has been a smoker all of her adult life and she makes every excuse in the book to  not   exercise and eat healthy. She has made false statements about exercising as a way to dissuade me to stop. Honestly, I let what she has said go in one ear and out the other. Simply put, she doesn’t know what she’s talking about when it comes to this topic. Anyway, I encourage you to do the same. Don’t let  anyone  (mother included) talk you out of taking care of yourself. If anything, she should be supportive.

TheRealPepperPotts · Accepted Answer

Wait, you are 34? There is a lot more going on here than just her being controlling. If you were 18 I'd be concerned about an eating disorder, but sheesh. Girl, you gotta get away from home. I mean, I understand with the price of housing and everything, but that's where I'd start. Make a plan to disentangle in a safe and practical way. You need to get your own life and stand on your own two feet. Just do it sensibly and don't get a boyfriend until you can be independent happily. And there's no need to burn bridges with your mom. Just quietly build a support network, make preparations that will put you in a safe and healthy location, and then tell (don't ask) your mom. She'll blow up, probably, but you'll need to keep it cool. I suspect she'll come around.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

Because your mom is fat. How fat is she? She's so fat she wants her daughter to be as well. The punchline needs some work, I got you, but the general sentiment is there.

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

I voted she's jealous and I think that's most likely the case. Females are infamous for trying to sabotage each other. Ever see a 'not as fat' chick mention she's going on a diet around fat chicks? If you have, then you know EXACTLY what I'm talking about. They go right into shit-talking about it mode.

Be a dude and say shit like that, and the response is usually "good for you" or advice, or they'll mention their own desire to do such a thing and stick with it. At worst, they might crack a joke which is just jest.

It's just one of those major behavioral differences I've noticed anecdotally. Exceptions to the rule exist... as always. Shit... maybe it could be just because they view each other as some sort of competition? I don't know... I'm just throwing shit to see what sticks to the wall sometimes.

Why is my mom so negative anytime I go to the gym?

Sevenpointfive · Answer

it's hard to see your children make the same mistakes that they made. i'll take her side for a moment and think that she does this out of protection. sometimes genetics is the key to how you will look in the future regardless of your actions to prevent it.

but you aren't young. you know your situation and capabilities more than i do. if you want to achieve certain goals, then you are the only one standing in your way. i've seen mothers do the exact opposite for their overweight daughters. taken them back from morbidly obese to incredibly in shape.

what would be a challenge for both of you, would to do this together. she's probably feeling old right now and sees you on the cusp of it being too late and where she gave up. have you ever invited her to work out with you? to change her diet? to connect in a way that you could grow closer to each other?

normalice · Answer

I've met women who are trying to be more attractive than their daughter and it's always uncomfortable. I can say you got off a little lite, though - the worst case I met was a woman who all but force fed her 14 year old daughter hamburgers so she would stay fat.

Mr_twoface · Answer

Maybe she believes your excessiveness is an underlying problem of you having a disorder or mentally struggling with self-confidence. Other reasons could be that she feels in her eyes, that you are too “skinny” for your height and age and hence pushes you to eat more and give you her peace of mind. To overcome this, simply, have an open communication with her about why you enjoy going to the gym rather than what other states about gym like your doctor.

SotiCoto · Answer

Probably because the "shape" you're trying to get into... is a stick.
Probably because your mother has a better idea of what a healthy bodyweight is and you've been severely misled by modern trends.
And most likely because paying to go to a room full of metal contraptions and waste time and effort using them to brute-force your body to look like something you saw online is insane.

Your mother just doesn't want you to be a gymcel.

KrisKris81 · Answer

It might make her feel out of shape, or that you and her have less in common. She might be concerned for your safety or feel like your just trying to get someone's attention by slimming down and/or wearing tight gym clothing. There are too many possibilities to worry about - Ask her what's going on, or just ignore it.

Kiss_Me · Answer

Mother care about their daughters. She is most likely concerned about you riding the bus at night. She may also be concerned, in her opinion, that you are starting to appear less feminine, and will have trouble finding a man.

fordtruck · Answer

My mom does the same but I just rock my swimming jammers and my cycling shorts and I just do workouts at home but she is always telling me to take a break or I will hurt myself

dustybiker2 · Answer

She loves you? Hug her and tell her "thank you" for caring about you. Not everyone has a great mother, or they are no longer around to care/do her job.

OfMiceandMen · Answer

Sounds to me like she doesn't mind you going to work out, it is just the time you choose to go in the evening hours. Maybe she feels it is unsafe at that hour?

genericname85 · Answer

cause obviously her idea of "what's good for you" is different from yours. i think it would be weird if jealousy was the case here. honestly i'm a bit weirdet out even by you having that as an option in the poll.

Likes2drive · Answer

Worried about you but only reason that makes sense is going on bus at night, maybe you look to thin to her, she is probably out of shape and doesn’t know it and comparing you to her

OtterMan68 · Answer

she wants control, and wants you to remain dependent on her. She can't let go

Alex-Snow · Answer

I think she just wishes she was you and may be jealous. Maybe invite her to come along with you next time?

exitseven · Answer

Sometimes older people have outdated opinions about working out.

Anonymous · Answer

Well, obviously that is not your real age, or at least I hope not.

Unit1 · Answer

Some mothers simply don't support their kids. Your case is nothing special

RedInnocent69 · Answer

Jealousy, but probably more like you’re showing off to pick up guys.

Kimberly1979 · Answer

Sounds like she can’t keep up I guess maybe to do with aging.

lomnsa · Answer

My assumption is she want you close not leave her side cause selfishness

DizzyDesii · Answer

Damn is this my sister?

Anonymous · Answer

Why not just ask her what her issue is.

jahaims · Answer

She has mental health issues

Why is my mom so negative anytime I go to the gym?

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