Why my wife hates that I go to the gym? How can I handle this situation?

[monkey]

We have been together for 8 years and married for 5 years and I have been exercising for a long time to stay healthy and confident, she also knows that. I recently stopped working out because of my workload but I am back on it. However, she thinks I am trying to get muscular to attract other women. I’ve explained it’s not about that, but she says it’s “different” because she’s working out for herself too. I feel frustrated because I don’t judge her fitness goals, so I don’t understand why she’s judging mine. I just want her to understand it’s about my confidence, not attention from others. What would you do if you were in my shoes?

[MisterWack]

Asker: “ I feel frustrated because I don’t judge her fitness goals, so I don’t understand why she’s judging mine. I just want her to understand it’s about my confidence, not attention from others. What would you do if you were in my shoes?”

Totally understandable for you to feel the way that you feel, maybe try to find a compromise and or reach a place of basic understanding (a focal point). I know it boosts your confidence, your stride, and helps you stay healthy okay… Though it is worth repeating to your wife then once you establish that, you must say that you are willing to make a compromise so you can continue to stay healthy & confident without her believing that you just want to attract other women because you are devoted to her and her alone. Try to make time for her, talk to her more, do activities together, take her out on more ‘dates’ while staying fit on the side. You don’t have to break your back ‘appeasing’ her, just have to put in some effort to calm her and make her feel at ease.

[imtiaz45]

Your wife’s feelings about the gym may stem from several factors: perhaps she misses spending time with you, feels insecure, or worries you’re prioritizing gym time over her. Start by having an open, calm conversation to understand her perspective and express why the gym matters to you. Reassure her that she’s important to you, and consider creating a balanced schedule that gives you both quality time. You could even invite her to join you, making it a shared activity. Addressing her feelings, being patient, and making her feel valued can go a long way toward resolving the issue.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/gO-b9zxNNJM

[silvermoon84]

Good for you (and her) for taking care of your health and working out. I don’t think you’re going to the gym to pick up other women but there are some people (both men and women) who do use the gym as a pick up scene. Maybe if you wanted to, consider inviting your wife to come with you to the gym and maybe you could workout together. I know one couple who actually plan dates around going to the gym (I’m friends with the woman and she calls them “gym dates”). It sucks that your wife is insecure about you going to the gym, but I’m thinking maybe if you’re open to working out together once in a while it might alleviate some of her insecurities.

[Anonymous]

Seems like she’s feeling insecure that you might end up looking too hot that someone else might snatch you up lol. Either way, just go to the gym anyway, you’re not doing anything wrong. But I think you need to explain to her better that you’re doing all this not only for your own confidence but also for her. Tell her that you want her to have a hot husband that she can be proud of plus it’ll make things better in bed. Just give her reassurance that you’re doing it for yourself and for her.

[AI Opinion]

Hey there, lovebirds! Sounds like we've got a spicy mix of gym drama and insecurities on our hands. Your wife's concerns could stem from fear, not distrust—you’re becoming a gym shark, and she probably wonders what's swimming in your waters 🦈. Reassure her by spicing up your workouts together or cherish non-gym activities to build that special bond. Little things matter! Confidence is appealing, so keep communicating and lovebomb her with understanding. Before you know it, she’ll be cheering you on as your gym MVP! 💪❤️

[Finchie40]

It sounds like she is the one being up to no good and projecting her selfish behavior on to you , if she is working out as well?

[caitycat21]

Her fears probably irrational. Best case scenario would be to just somehow turn this into something beneficial for both of you guys, since she’s trying to better herself and you’re already experienced in the gym maybe turn going to the gym into something you both do together?

[fairytale]

As a woman, I think your wife is right. After marriage, you share a common life and she may want to spend time with you or she may be afraid of being cheated on. Have you had a trust problem before? If you have, you should agree with her. Or if this is a big problem between you, you should focus on a different sports field instead of fitness.

[Unit1]

Work out anyway. You ain't cheating, although that can be added to the list of what constitutes as cheating by now.

[PeachyPie93]

I would tell her "I am working out if you don't trust me there is nothing I can do especially since I always worked out except for when I was super busy." How can she tell you not to workout when she also works out too.. seems sus..

[solare]

Bro may not trust you, which is normal if she goes to the gym too. In fact, the reason for this is either that she has come across cheating incidents around her or that he is cheating on you. You can offer her to go together.

[jshm2]

Because she wants you to handle her tits and ass more than you handle those dumbells, you limp, daft ass!

Get a fucking clue, she wants your attention in person and in the bedroom. You're wasting all that effort in the gym instead!

[Anonymous]

I workout because I don't have much of a choice I go through surgical procedures once every 3 months for cancer and ot takes a month minimum for my body to recover but unfortunately the most 2 recent surgical procedures left me with massive internal inflammation and internal blood vessels that are ready to break and lots of internal swelling

[exitseven]

Going to the gym is a much better pastime than hanging out in bars like a lot of guys do. You had fitness goals when you met. ask her what is different now.

[soe11]

• Why don'tyou take her along with you?
• If you like her then problem will be eliminated.
• My cas, I go with my girlfriend.

[jonsnow]

I think you didn't understand the message here, she is actually jealous of you and wants to go with you. Which is very normal, why don't you go together? It will be an activity in your marriage and you will spend time together.

[Anonymous]

So turn it around.

"They can look all they want. The only one I'm coming home to is you."

[Opinion Owner]

Good for you putting the effort in to be fit. It feels good. Keep at it.

[LiamJHayden]

Could be that she is doing that or gets hit on while working out and is projecting that upon you.

[Pohjolan]

Sounds like a shit test. Just keep working out.

[seeyounexttuesday]

You tell her "I'm going to the gym. Your opinion is noted, but I'm going anyway".

[paledreams]

Why oh why do humans never pick compatible lol

[Jmmmfi4]

SHE SOUNDS LIKE A RETARD TO BE HONEST

[Anonymous]

Divorce.

[Anonymous]

Curl her