I don't know if I can handle being pregnant, is there any comforting words you can offer?

[Anonymous]

I'm 9 weeks and 3 days.
One month before conception I said I wasn't ready despite our conversation initially where I said due to age if it happens. But that didn't mean not use protection we did. So it seems on his birthday when we were drunk thats when we conceived. Yawwwnn!

Anyways my moods have been so down as my every has been so low. I already suffer from low iron, and suspected it was low. After my blood screening it's highlighted its dangerously low. I also have a uti so I just feel shit.
My boiler is broken and I would love to just have a bath but I'm having to make di with using my kettle.
I'm due to go on holiday next week a family one where I've not told my mum about my pregnancy and I just feel so anxious.

It's quite overwhelming. My partner has been coming across a little distracted and not as attached...
I get that he's dealt with some grief and now his friend is getting ready to leave the country indefinitely. But I'm finding it annoying that time with him feels blighted by him planning time to spend with them when he's with me.
I feel incredibly selfish atm but I feel like I've been so understanding of him and his life that I'm fed up.

I'm working over time to earn more money because I have been struggling a bit, but the team aren't helping me despite me being there to support them.

I could have done with a whole weeks leave before this holiday given everything but I didn't as my team member took the days off.

I have diahorra due to the iron tablets and such bad bloating. Im eating better but it's so shit. I could scream right now!

[Oliverlogan263]

Oh girl, I feel you - that is all a lot to deal with! But you've got this, even if it doesn't always feel like it. A few things that may help:

- Take it one day at a time. Don't try to worry about the whole pregnancy, just focus on getting through each day.

- Lean on your partner and loved ones for support. Clearly state what you need from him right now. Maybe schedule special one-on-one time to reconnect.

- Talk to your doctor about better iron supplements or treatments. Feeling physically drained makes everything worse.

- Try relaxing activities like long baths (could you get a friend's bath?), meditation, yoga - find ways to relieve stress each day.

- When family vacation comes, tell your mum! Sharing your truth may lift a weight you've been carrying.

- Be kind to yourself. Growing a tiny human is seriously hard work! Don't saddle yourself with extra guilt on top.

You've got this mama! Tough days are always followed by better ones. This phase will pass - soon you'll be meeting your little bundle of joy. For now, prioritize rest and allowing others to support you. You've got this!

[Asker]

Thank you so much for this. You are so thoughtful and kind. Totally makes sense. 😊❤️

[Oliverlogan263]

Aw no worries at all boo, that's what we're here for right? This pregnancy stuff can get so overwhelming, so it helps to chat it out with people who get it. I'm real glad even just taking a sec to breathe and giving yourself some TLC is helping. And don't forget - your feelings are totally valid even when you're stressed. You just push through the tough parts however you can.

Definitely let that doctor know if those iron pills aren't working out, there's gotta be an easier solution. And your man needs to step up too, it takes a village and all that! Wishing you an easy rest of your first trimester. You got this mama, keep taking care of yourself and that sweet babe. Holler if an extra listening ear helps at all. You got this!

[In_Trance]

Live and learn

[ClaircognizantEmpath]

aaaww bless you, yes get through another a few weeks into the second tri and your bodies initial shock should settle... regarding men as the fathers im gonna be completely honest being pregnant is lonely.. its happening to you and you alone... the fathers role/life stays the same... his body, his mind, his life.. whilst you are being consumed by literally a parasite... scientific fact! lol so get your head in order you're the female soul whos portal ability is moving ahead with bringing forth another soul to this realm and take that and use it to give you strength to demand what you need from the father, because he won't do it himself.. because he has no clue... they never do never will... and as for the bath this is exactly what i mean, he should do this for you... dm me anytime if you wanna chat re babies pregnancy, im pretty good and had a god awful time of it too!!! lol

[Asker]

Thank you so much for this message. I have been getting so pissed of at him. He reads information online and then just keeps spewing this general talk. It's pretty normal to feel like this! Grrr! Can't you just listen to me and stop making my feelings feel less than they are?

I had to tell my mum because of our holiday and the new antibiotics I'm taking could have a really bad reaction. Anyways she's been amazing. The other night I was struggling to cook dinner - salmon and rice with veg just kept making me want to be sick. She came round and finished it for me. It was the best thing.
He has been taking so much time off work for his friend that the last 2 days we've hardly spoken as he's had to stay at work until after 8 to catch up on things before we fly out. It's ridiculous...
Now the friends gone ill be interested to see how he behaves because he doesn't seem to really understand.

[ClaircognizantEmpath]

sounds a bit like maybe avoidance too, have you had your holiday? how are you?

[Sophia00]

i’m sorry that u feel like that:(. i’m no doctor so maybe u can ask your doctor for treatment for nausea.

and also congratulations for your baby! ig women have to sacrifice a lot during pregnancy but u’ll give someone a precious life!✨

p. s. i’ve heard that the first trimester is the most annoying (nausea, vomitting,..) so hopefully u’ll feel better after that☺️

[Asker]

Thank you... Its a really weird period of time

[Sophia00]

hopefully it’ll get better:)) maybe also get some advice from other pregnant women because situations may be relatable and it will comfort u that u’re not alone☺️

[Asker]

The problem is because it's so early I haven't told anyone yet. My pregnancy is high risk as this is my 6th in the hope of going to full term. Please don't judge it's been a journey to get to this, miscarriage wasn't easy. Hence my panic a month before conception. I don't know if mentally I'm strong enough to do this.

[Sophia00]

i’m so sorry for your misscarriage🥺🥺 i can’t imagine how hard that was. do u go to gynecologist often to check your baby’s health? i hope this will be your rainbow baby🥰and u can do it!!

[Asker]

I'm still waiting for the obstetrician referral. There's a lot going on atm so I'm feeling incredibly stressed.

[Sophia00]

well i hope everything will be okay and u’ll feel less stress the next moths and that u’ll deliver your baby safely☺️ and it’s also okay to not be okay and to feel stressed✨

[Asker]

Thank you Sophia, I appreciate your kind words. They have been very positive and comforting at such a difficult time. ❤️

[Sophia00]

u’re very welcome🥰u can dm me any time u want if u jave hard times✨

[HelpfulWoman]

eh, abortions exist and honestly i'd suggest you use that. I can't offer comfort for pregnancy because i hated it (both times, because somehow i hoped the 2nd would be easier. fool me once...)

[jahaims]

Don't take actions you aren't willing to have the consequences for.