What do you do when a person you invited to eat at your home invites another member of her family without asking you?

[Amy10223]

I invited a couple and their daughter, and this one lady for dinner. Just found out the lady is bringing her son and I never knew it until today.
It would be fine, but there are six now, and I have a round table for 4 people. I can add another chair for 5 but it’s not very big, the table. About 48 inches across. So I guess two people will sit on the couch to eat. Am I being too fussy?
A note: the one who invited her son now once overstayed at my home. We went to lunch at 11:30, came back to my house to watch a bit of tv at 3:30, and she left at 7:30 when I had a class at 8:00. I never had her over again until this weekend. So

in my invite I said it’s from 4:00 to 7:00, just in case she decides to stay too long again.

[Nikki1989]

Explain your perspective: “When I invite someone over for a meal, I usually plan for a specific number of people in terms of food, seating, and sometimes even cost. It would be really helpful in the future if you could let me know if you intend to bring someone else along.”

[Amy10223]

I invited 3 people originally. The couple has a daughter, who I said could come along. That was enough at my table.,

[LauraJ00]

She already crossed your boundaries once in the past. Now she’s doing it again. You need to say gently “The invitation was only extended to you, not your sin, it’s ok this time but please don’t do it again”.

[Amy10223]

She is something else. If you can, please read what I told Ironman above.
She did that last April, when she wouldn’t leave. I am not good at telling people, “you know I’m tired T now now. Can you leave?” I have not had her over since then.
Sometime before this, when I had just had a knee implant put in, she came to stay and “help me”. I fixed the couch so I could lay my leg on it. She took it as a sign it was for her, She had a little scab on her shin about the foot that had been biopsied for cancer. So that night I finally went to bed and my knee had swollen up so much that I had to ice it all night.
This is why this time I told not her and the couple coming, from 4:00 to 7:00. But after this, no more.

[Amy10223]

* “I’m not good at telling people it’s time to go”
But I’m going to say, “Well I’d love to have you here longer but it’s that time when my body is saying I need to rest so…”

[Sevenpointfive]

omg if this were true! i'd have dropped them off at the bus stop. these don't even sound like people from your culture. who were they? if they were travelling that's another.

[msc545]

Learn a lesson and never invite this couple to anything again.

[Amy10223]

Had not invited the single woman after that other time. The couple are just friends of hers who I became friends with at a wine club I belong to. I didn't mind the couple and daughter, I would just pull up a chair (that I don't really have spares-- I have those cushioned chairs). I guess two people or one will have to eat alone on the couch.

[Paige90]

It's only one person. I wouldn't make a big deal or say anything.

[Amy10223]

It's just the table setting I am not prepared for. Yes, one person but I had 4 or 5 in mind. Now I have 6 and a table that fits 4.

[Ironic_Method]

That's just plain rude.

... and weird.

[Amy10223]

I think the lady is a little too forward. Not exactly rude. She once argued with me saying that Vincent Van Gogh, the Dutch painter, was born in Peru. I know he was born in Holland. She said she read somewhere he was born in Peru. I was in Holland once and in a Van Gogh museum, so I knew. She tried to brush it off but I could tell she didn’t like being in the wrong.

[Ironic_Method]

That's when you just Google it on your phone :P

[Amy10223]

Yeah but I knew he was Dutch. I don’t know where she got her info.
Oh, I think I looked it up on my phone to show her. She got all flustered.
I think I try to be more patient with her because she is very religious. Almost a fanatic.