Guy friend doesn't want to talk to me anymore advice?

[Anonymous]

I ended up friend zoning my best friend and the guy I had no idea that I would have a crush on until he chose to date someone else. In my defense he never told that he had feelings for me and put me in awkward situations that everyone would ship or not like me. I need clarity and I need to feel secure. Friendship: 4 years. We always acted like husband and wife he was a super sweet gentlemen and always put me first and really help me if i needed him He is the kindest soul and has been there for me at my lowest, highs to celebrate me and always make me feel included in everything. My turn off was he kept talking about women and all the girls he dated when i was with him and his friends and i felt i was being disrespected either you like me or not. Not only that he was trying to invade my life like he was my husband. He used to show up at my work out of nowhere and drag his friends along to pretend he was shopping and bump into me (in his way maybe it was romantic but creeped me out) we got into a disagreement one time about my new job and this boy ran me down my entire resume of where i worked the last 3 jobs) One time I was hanging out with him in my friends group and my mom came by and he introduces himself to my mom trying to shake her hand like he is my boyfriend and meeting her for the first time all of my friends looked at him cause wtf? He used to invited me to hang out with his friends and i be the only one out of our friends group going so i would have to meet his friends on his terms and it just felt like we were dating when we weren't. Don't even get me started on jealousy one of our mutual guy friends gave me a hug once and he flipped his lid trying to distract me and make me laugh as if he did not have a crash out (never saw that guy again). Hugged another one of our mutual guy friends and now he has a girlfriend don't talk to me anymore and even moved to another community.

[AvaRay]

It sounds like your friendship became a blurred line between affection n control..

He may hv had feelings, but feelings alone don’t justify invading your boundaries, creating jealousy, or making u feel uncomfortable..

U were clear with your boundaries, yet he overstepped repeatedly showing up uninvited, treating u like a partner when u weren’t, n reacting possessively..

That behavior isn’t romantic, it’s disrespectful..

U can mourn the friendship, but understand that he chose his actions over your comfort..

Sometimes the kindest, most devoted people r not aligned with our lives n that’s okay..

True respect doesn’t wait for permission it honors boundaries, celebrates individuality, n allows space..

If someone can’t do that, their absence isn’t loss, it’s liberation..

[Anonymous]

He was playing u and another girl at the same time. He never came to the point and asked u to be his girlfriend

[OneViewpoint]

Wow, there's a lot to unpack here. It sounds like high school at age 30-35. So you were acting like a she-bro. And he didn't have the balls to tell you he wanted to be boyfriend and girlfriend. Sounds like two immature people squandered an opportunity because of fear / lack of confidence.

If you do everything to put him in the friend zone yeah, he's gonna treat you like a she-bro. You get to hang out with the guys and listen to them talk about other women because that's what the bro's do. You're just another friend, why would you care who he's dating / doing?

Now he's given up on you and moved on to someone else and you have a bad case of FOMO. Let it go. Sounds like you two were a disaster of immaturity and low confidence. You both wasted 4 years in each other's friend zones. Don't waste any more time.

[Anonymous]

Ladies, no man wants to be your best friend unless he’s gay. If a girl is cute, her male “friends” want to get w her. In your situation this dude hung around for 4 years, that’s sad. If I’m being honest sounds like he has no balls. I don’t see how you couldn’t see it yourself, especially when he was bringing up other women to try to make you jealous. I’d move on. Honestly this whole “friendship” was a sham. There was an ulterior motive on his side. A lot of sad, pathetic men will stay in that friend zone hoping that one day she will really see him as a good man who would make a good partner, or even just to nail her at the least.

[Staximus]

You missed the boat dude

[In_Trance]

ridiculous