How do I handle parents pressuring me to live with them into my 30s?

[Anonymous]

My parents act under the assumption that im obliged to live with them. They helped me move in to the city that im currently based in and helped to buy the condo so now they never want to leave. I’m going to move out eventually just need to be financially independent. I mentioned wanting more freedom and my desire to live alone and they guilt-trip me highlighting things they did for me. They also excessively call and text me during the day including social outings. They discouraging me from going out saying they already cooked for me and it disrupts their sleep schedule when i come late. Im doing research to gtfo, any suggestions in transition?

[Travi186]

It sounds like your parents are either struggling with you becoming an adult or still want control but either way, no matter what they say you don't owe them an explanation. When you’re ready to leave, just leave. You’re not obligated to stay there just because they did the job of a parent, a job they are responsible for regardless so its weird they are trying to use that against you. As far as a financial standpoint, make a plan, research places to live, maybe get a roommate if needed. Until you get your finances in order the problem is the plan will just be a plan. When you get to that point i would have one last talk with them about moving out. Let them say their peace but if what they are saying isn't reasonable, just leave. At that point you will already have a place ready. They are grown they will be fine. You need to find your own way.

[Asker]

Yeah the idea was that my mother would back with my dad but then she never wanted to. She doesn’t even really leave to visit him, just very rarely once a year if my dad begged her to come for a medical check up. They are paying for rent and i thought about paying them just to get more freedom but they will be infuriated if i offer. Also, it doesn’t even feel like a good house to relax, since my mother barely leaves home and she is always in the living room. She only ever talks to me to assign housework, my work and food. One time i had a friend over she was complaining that we would take up the living room for a few hours so i never wanted to invite anyone again. Also, im a bit wary of moving out because i heard a lot of horror stories about landlords but i hope to find a middle ground

[Anonymous]

That’s the opposite of most parents. Can you afford to move out? If you can just do it.

[Asker]

If i find a secure accommodation, this is what i want to do as well

[Opinion Owner]

Good luck. Hope you find one.

[Asker]

Thank you! Yeah i hope. Going away to shirt trips have been good for me so far, as in their interest in my whereabouts drop when im not around though i heard some parents still call everyday

[MasterKS]

They need to grow up.

[jahaims]

By being an adult