How do you cope and set boundaries with an abusive parent?

[Anonymous]

This actually feels very hard to write but my parents have hit me before when i was a kid and i didn’t have the maturity to know it was wrong. I wasn’t a horrible kid either. My mother still has a violent side as she also attempted to raise a hand to hit me but i stopped her when i was an adult. Not sure why im writing this but i feel horrible being treated like trash. Even though she didn’t technically hit me she was walking towards me and saw her raising a hand either to pull me by the arm or slap me because we were arguing. Wtf? What is best way to deal with an abusive parent?

[EmmaMary]

At your age I had already left home, got married and set up our own home.

Obviously I'm not saying you should get married, but you should at least consider leaving home and making your own way through life... Good Luck.

[Asker]

Yeah i broke up w my ex so can’t really move in with him but im getting out of the house to rent an airbnb for a few days. I might just switch off my phone so she doesn’t keep harassing me

[EmmaMary]

Then Do It... And stand firm with your decisions.

[Staximus]

The next time she hits you you beat the shit out of her

[Asker]

Not that kind of person, plus i will look like a giant asshole

[Staximus]

When somebody hits you you hit them back or they will keep doing it

[Asker]

Yeah but she is my mother… and she technically she never actually hit me. She just threatened with her hand. She might use that kind of reaction against me to portray me as the bad daughter she already is trying to depict.

[beenherebefore]

You leave them. Period.

[Asker]

Yeah i think threat of physical violence is the last straw. She doesn’t think it is wrong because i have “disrespected” her in her eyes.

[Asker]

But im pretty sure because we were the only ones there she will pretend she didn’t do it if i tell my dad. So she will make me look crazy

[beenherebefore]

If you're an adult and no longer live with her you don't have to stay in touch with someone who treats you so poorly.

[Asker]

Actually im living with her but renting out an airbnb to leave rn, not decided on how i will proceed because i have to research for safe accommodation so it might take a while.

[beenherebefore]

Getting an airbnb and moving out is the best option.

[Asker]

💯💯💯