Do guys know their own strength or do they have to be told?

Question

Ok so a little backstory to this is that last night a guy friend and myself were play wrestling because we were super bored and just got done studying for one of our midterms for one of our college classes we have together. Anyway, while we were wrestling, he grabbed my arms a few times, and it hurt quite a bit. I just let it go and didn't say anything about it because I didn't want to ruin the laughs we were getting out of it. However, I know have bruises all up and down my arms. What I'm asking is, do guys know their own strength or do they have to be told? And if guys do know their own strength, then was he just treating me like one of his guy friends that he would wrestle?

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

He doesn't know he hurt you. Guys wrestle rough with other guys so he was probably kind of treating you like one of his guy friends. I have bruises all over my right bicep right now from wrestling with one of my friends last Saturday. I've have had bloody noses, sprained arms, cuts, and scrapes from wrestling my guy friends. When we wrestle or hit each other we don't ever think about bruises because no guy ever yells, "stop that will bruise tomorrow" LOL.

What you can do next time this happens is yell ouch when he grabs your arm and then say "not so hard" as you laugh and playfully hit him or push him back. If you do that hopefully he'll get the message that he grabbed you too hard but you're not really mad and still want to play fight. If he does stop like he's scared to wrestle after your reaction just jump on him and he'll start fighting back again.

jaw_500 · Accepted Answer

Ya I have to be reminded quite often of my strength. Sad thing is that I am a large framed strong guy and I know it, I just forget. Plus when its wrestling around or whatever with a female its even worse. Because lets face it, yall are much smaller and weeker than a lot of guys. I'd like to kick myself for it but I just can't help it, I'm the youngest in my family so I always delt with older and bigger kids growing up so I am naturally using more force than I should :(

drjaydrjay · Answer

Ditto the boys; we have no idea and don't even think about the strength difference. Truth is nearly all men have never tried to brutalise a chick to the point where she's fighting back at full strength, so it rarely dawns on us that females experience life so incredibly differently to us. we only know what's normal to us, even more so your average guy who doesn't specifically strength train but is also naturally 2-3x stronger than an average female. i will carry all 10 bags of groceries with 1 arm while she wants to make 10 trips or I'll flip the bed with 1 arm to check underneath and she gets scared I'll drop it although it doesn't feel like much to me. Sports are gender segregated for a reason, so our concept of pitting our strength against others is nearly always sporting with other males & they generally match what we consider to be normal, give or take a bit, so there's never reason to consider it. this has happened in the bedroom with me often and i initially thought i was just dating fragile sensitive women, whereas I now know i need to seriously check my strength and behave as if handling raw eggs with females. the difference is just astoundingly surprising. I also started lifting to work off COVID quarantine weight and am 2x stronger than i already was. i don't even play wrestle any more bc even at under quarter strength she still complains about hurting, so it's just not feasible and i could only rough & tumble with other men, as it were

Minus · Answer

Sometimes guys can get carried away or really don't realize something like that hurts.

I didn't realize my size or strength until I noticed if I stepped on something I left on the ground, I would break it instead of hurting my foot.

Maybe just show him the bruises. It'll make him realize he can't rough house like he could with another guy.

Let him know that you're delicate!

THE_Godfather · Answer

I'm sure he'll see the bruises. Just say "we" got a little too rough. Next time say something like be careful I don't want to have a lot of bruises again. Then immediately go back to wrestling.

I was told that I have a lot of might in my fingers. You tell me what that means. Girls have their own language.

WhiteSteve · Answer

yeah, I'd say a lot of guys don't know they're own strength when it comes to wrestling with girls. I saw a few incidents in college where a guy and girl would play fight, and it would end with the girl being like "what the f*ck, assh0le!" and punching him in the head. they'd be over it 5 minutes later, but it was funny as hell to watch it go down, hahahaha. so just tell him to take a little off it next time!

SoberIrishman · Answer

Well no, not every guy knows their strength. I constantly workout, so my strength grows a lot, and I have to try and keep it in check, but I have hurt a few people I care about by accident, whether it be a joking punch on the arm, or restraining someone in a fight. He could of been treating you like a guy, but all guys should know to hold back with girls since we are more gentically taylored to being muscular.

Anonymous · Answer

You should have said something, but he probably just didn't realize because you didn't.  It depends on the girl too, but if you're a small girl for sure.  My girlfriend is not huge, but she's the type of girl who would throw on boxing gloves and mess up another chick rather than engage in a slap fight.  So she's tough and I like to tease her whenever she hits me about how weak she is, and she gets mad because when she does I just start laughing at her.  So yes, most girls are weak. haha

Anonymous · Answer

well I believe he might have not ever played around that way with a girl before, so he was probably unconscious that he was being too rough, as he is probably used to playing around like that with his guy friends. I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt you, so a reminder wouldn't hurt.

Anonymous · Answer

If it hurt you should have said something. We don't want to hurt you, but we also don't want to treat you like a fragile object that needs to be kept in a tower away from the world. No, sometimes we do not know our own strength or realize that what we can do others can not. We might pick up a few hundred pounds thinking it's easy and that others can do the same. We might be a little ruff and not realize it. Speak up next time and I'm sure he'll tone it down a few notches.

Love_is_in_the_air · Answer

suuuuuuuuuuuure "wrestling" ;D I see what you did there :D

taster · Answer

No..do not know our own strength..and do not understand how easily females bruise...(:

JayCutler · Answer

we don't know and women are so sensitive and feminine so sometime we just don't know

shumailkazimi · Answer

mostly they know it but they like to be told...every1 wants a pat on the back

Guysensei · Answer

speak up.. he prob doesn't realize

kaitlovesyou · Answer

Lol yea I'd think so I have to remind my husband

Alpha93 · Answer

I don't know my own strength

Do guys know their own strength or do they have to be told?

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